LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Romantic > Dating

He hasn't responded to my text in 4 hours


Dating Dating, courting, or going steady? Things not working out the way you had hoped? Stand up on your soap box and let us know what's going on!

Old 22nd September 2010, 1:34 AM   #1
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Highway to Hell
Posts: 2,430
He hasn't responded to my text in 4 hours

4 hours and counting.

I am so sick of this. I texted him today if he would prefer to catch upo on Friday or Saturday night. My friends are organizing a girls night and I needed to know when I am free.

My worst fears are coming true and I am being abandoned without so much as "there is no chemistry" or similar lame line.

I do know that he doesn't owe me anything after 3 dates and leading me to beleive that there is a fourth. But I did think that this guy is better than that. I guess not
SadandConfusedWA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:37 AM   #2
Established Member
 
USMCHokie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Northern California
Posts: 15,280
Oh...em...gee...

Here I rely on the standard 24 hour "grace period" for responses when it comes to modern correspondence...seriously, four hours is nothing...if it's been four days, then maybe you have an issue...
__________________
Ad hominem - attacks on a person rather than on the validity of evidence or an argument
Reductio Ad Absurdum - argument that an extreme of a position must be true as well
False Dilemma - giving two extremes as the only alternatives to a position
Confirmation Bias - considering only evidence favorable to one's own position
USMCHokie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:45 AM   #3
Established Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 46,273
Journal Entries: 39
Probably late to this dynamic, but, after three dates, just *call* him. A voice can be a more powerful motivator than text, IMO. You can debate the value of motivation, but I'm reading here that you would enjoy a fourth date and my advice is offered with that in mind. Good luck
carhill is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:45 AM   #4
Established Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 5,917
I agree with Hokie. You really need to chill. Four hours is nothing.
tigressA is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:46 AM   #5
Established Member
 
florence of suburbia's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Stopping by the mirage.
Posts: 1,196
Quote:
Originally Posted by USMCHokie View Post
Oh...em...gee...

Here I rely on the standard 24 hour "grace period" for responses when it comes to modern correspondence...seriously, four hours is nothing...if it's been four days, then maybe you have an issue...
I agree...not everyone is a slave to their electronic devices. Some people actually..... turn their phones off!

Sorry, but, get a life. (and I'd be telling myself the same thing if I was obsessing the way you are right now.)
florence of suburbia is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:47 AM   #6
Established Member
 
USMCHokie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Northern California
Posts: 15,280
I must agree with carhill on this one...you should call for more important matters such as this where urgency might be required...
USMCHokie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:52 AM   #7
Established Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 46,273
Journal Entries: 39
*If* the OP isn't/hasn't been calling her intended on the phone, such an effort would, IMO, be greatly appreciated and valued by a man who has genuine interest. Like I said, I don't know all the details but I do know the value I place upon hearing the voice of a woman I like over the phone, even across the world. It has impact no text can achieve.

However, as she has sent a text, I'd give it a *day* and then call, predicated on the reality that they have had three productive and enjoyable dates. I'm in the OP's part of the world right now (Singapore) and the weekend is a little closer over here so I understand her wanting to firm up plans. Hope it works out!
carhill is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 1:56 AM   #8
Established Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 210
Quote:
Originally Posted by SadandConfusedWA View Post
4 hours and counting.

I am so sick of this. I texted him today if he would prefer to catch upo on Friday or Saturday night. My friends are organizing a girls night and I needed to know when I am free.

My worst fears are coming true and I am being abandoned without so much as "there is no chemistry" or similar lame line.

I do know that he doesn't owe me anything after 3 dates and leading me to beleive that there is a fourth. But I did think that this guy is better than that. I guess not
Please tell me this post is a joke?

You've just had your third date.. who exactly do you think you are to command his full attention? You sound incredibly needy and possessive.
Allisha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:00 AM   #9
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 26,423
Quote:
Originally Posted by USMCHokie View Post
Oh...em...gee...

Here I rely on the standard 24 hour "grace period" for responses when it comes to modern correspondence...seriously, four hours is nothing...if it's been four days, then maybe you have an issue...
I think I took 2 hours once to respond to one of your recent texts. I'm so glad you don't react this way.
Star Gazer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:01 AM   #10
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 26,423
SAC...did you read my thread in the self-improvement section? I think you should. This reaction isn't healthy at all.
Star Gazer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:02 AM   #11
Established Member
 
sugarmomma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: closer than close
Posts: 1,362
Why didn't you just plan your girls night out and then let him get in where you can fir him in??

Why are you planning your life around a man??

Why are you initiating??

Let him do more of the work since it makes the man feel more in control.

He probably feels like you're sweating him.

Relax. Follow his lead.
__________________
Easy is an adjective used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man. ~Nancy Linn-Desmond
sugarmomma is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:05 AM   #12
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 26,423
Quote:
Originally Posted by sugarmomma View Post
Why didn't you just plan your girls night out and then let him get in where you can fit him in??

Why are you planning your life around a man??
Great questions.
Star Gazer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:10 AM   #13
Established Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 17,330
Quote:
Originally Posted by SadandConfusedWA View Post
4 hours and counting.

I am so sick of this. I texted him today if he would prefer to catch upo on Friday or Saturday night. My friends are organizing a girls night and I needed to know when I am free.

My worst fears are coming true and I am being abandoned without so much as "there is no chemistry" or similar lame line.

I do know that he doesn't owe me anything after 3 dates and leading me to beleive that there is a fourth. But I did think that this guy is better than that. I guess not
Quote:
11pm me: "hey how are you?"

11:30pm (no reply) so me again: "Do you want to catch up sometime?"

11:33pm him: Yeah, I can't do this week though so how about next?

11:34pm me: Cool, I am free towards the end of next week, let's grab a drink

11:36pm him: Sounds like a plan!

11.37pm me: Awesome!

-------------------------

Here it gets even worse. Note: still drunk

12:01am me (somebody shoot me): Actually you can think about it by next week, the last thing I want to do is pressure you into it.

NOTHING for 30 minutes

12:30am him: I am going to bed, goodnight

12:31am me: good night

12:41am me: sleep well

12:45am him: you too

12 47am him: how is your project going? (he is talking about work)

12:48am me: blah blah blah blah

12:50am him: blah blah bah blah (just some work stuff, boring)

12:51am me: I have another 5am start tomorrow

12:52am him: Jesus go to sleep then!!!!!!!

12:53am me: good night (again)
it's Tuesday... so go ahead and plan your girls night.

since he never actually stated when or IF he'd see you - don't expect it. IF he wanted to see you he would have nailed it down when you were texting, but he didn't. now you're pushing him... chasing even.

he's just not that interested but you keep pushing. IF he asks you eventually for the night you're busy - just tell him you're busy and suggest a night for the next week.

stop chasing him = he's running faster than you.
2sunny is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:12 AM   #14
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 26,423
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2sunny View Post
it's Tuesday... so go ahead and plan your girls night.

since he never actually stated when or IF he'd see you - don't expect it. IF he wanted to see you he would have nailed it down when you were texting, but he didn't. now you're pushing him... chasing even.

he's just not that interested but you keep pushing. IF he asks you eventually for the night you're busy - just tell him you're busy and suggest a night for the next week.

stop chasing him = he's running faster than you.
The guy in THIS thread isn't the same guy as the texts you're quoting. Those are from her old Politician guy. Two different people.
Star Gazer is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 22nd September 2010, 2:18 AM   #15
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Highway to Hell
Posts: 2,430
2sunny it's a different guy....
SadandConfusedWA is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Beyond Mortified! Responded to wrong text when talking to 2 guys..UGH Kerri_29 Dating 6 13th September 2010 4:51 PM
Responded to him EricaH329 Coping 35 2nd December 2009 4:43 PM
He responded katty774 Breaks and Breaking Up 7 19th October 2008 12:19 PM
She Responded... kizik Coping 64 18th June 2008 12:45 AM

 

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:04 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2013 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.