carealothugs Posted August 25, 2010 Share Posted August 25, 2010 :oI have this guy friend and obviously were in the "friend zone" but having "fun" and I really like him and the past few times i've been with him it's like being a couple he strokes my hair, holds my hand,teases me, cuddles me esp when were watching a movie and yes weve slept together twice i've had "fun" before and normaly its just a quickie over and done with but this isnt I stay over with him he brings me Coffee and cooks me meals also and makes sure i'm fine i'm confused just now and when we speak on msn were hot and cold he makes an excuse to fall out with me an keeps it a few hurs then speaks again when were around each other its differnt is he wanting to give it a shot or is he too scared to say it incase he thinks I don't want too it's sooo confusing any adivce would be good i'm seeing him again soon and this time i'm going to be the one in charge to show him what hes missing to get him going. Link to post Share on other sites
angelj Posted August 25, 2010 Share Posted August 25, 2010 I think you really need to confront him and ask. It's scary but it sounds like you like him... Or the idea of him and you a lot. If you don't find out where his heads at, you risk the chance of him finding a girlfriend :/ Link to post Share on other sites
Author carealothugs Posted August 25, 2010 Author Share Posted August 25, 2010 (edited) I think you really need to confront him and ask. It's scary but it sounds like you like him... Or the idea of him and you a lot. If you don't find out where his heads at, you risk the chance of him finding a girlfriend :/ I'm hoping the 3rd time of the "fun" stuff will make him see what he can find in me we get on really well apart from msn convos and he makes an excuse to fall out apart from that everything is great, its just so confusing I do like him alot but he doesn't know I like him alot dont want to freak him out this soon I also don't want this wrecked and want a way to keep it going without being to needy to him otherwise that will ruien a friendship as well as the "fun" my stomach also goes funny around him since this has happend and hasnt been while we were just mates. Edited August 25, 2010 by carealothugs Link to post Share on other sites
callingyouuu Posted August 25, 2010 Share Posted August 25, 2010 Have you heard of the concept of "friends with benefits"? To be honest, I don't think having a third "fun" time will help him see that he wants to be in a relationship with you. I think that if you let him have "fun" with you without being in a relationship for a third time, that will set a precedent that makes him think that he can just have noncommittal sex, which puts you in a really bad position if you're looking for more. Link to post Share on other sites
curlygirl40 Posted August 25, 2010 Share Posted August 25, 2010 Have you heard of the concept of "friends with benefits"? To be honest, I don't think having a third "fun" time will help him see that he wants to be in a relationship with you. I think that if you let him have "fun" with you without being in a relationship for a third time, that will set a precedent that makes him think that he can just have noncommittal sex, which puts you in a really bad position if you're looking for more. I've never quoted before so hopefully I did it correct but wanted to say 'DITTO'. What you're having is no strings attached sex. If it continues that way I'm willing to bet that it won't develop into a relationship at all. I know this might not be true all of the time, but I think usually once you start that way it's hard for you to be 'the one in charge'. He's in charge. You're having 'fun' with him w/o defining the 'relationship'. Which might be o.k if that's what you both want. BUT when you have feelings for him and want it to be more than just sex, you can't continue the FWB or 'no strings attached' sex and expect that it will grow into a relationship. You've already defined it otherwise. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
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