dunnowhat86 Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Hi, I really need someone's advice……… You see, I only see my boyfriend(of 2 years) in the weekends. And it is not like I spend every single minute with him even in the weekends. He is really busy at the moment because he is studying for his exams (he has a study group with two of his best pals). Anyways, I have been really understanding and take the opportunity to see him late, laaate at night (basically just say hi and just sleep together) and then the next day he gets up early to see his friends to study together (they even eat breakfast, lunch and dinner). However, I have become really frustratred now because it seems like when other things come along (such as a guy’s night out or gigs etc) he takes time off and spends good time with his friends drinking and partying. So that leaves me a bit clueless, because I thought the reason why we could not spend quality time together was because he was so busy? For the last 3 weeks, whenever we spend time we have been doing so by studying together. Even last weekend I spend time in the library studying, whilst him and his friends (the ones he study together) were in the other room next to me. But then again, he is not “so busy” when it comes to his friends? We also prior to this, havent gone out much because he says that he does not have much money, but then again he does have money to go out with his mates and buy people drinks? can i emphasize that this is not the first time that this problem has come up. Anyways, I was not going to say anything, but then this week has been a bit stressful and it slip out. But I said it in the nicest ways – i said that i have been really understanding but that i have been hurt because he doesnt seem to have time to relax with me, but that that only happens with his friends. he first said that he understood, but then the next day just did not text me nothing. when we later talked he complained that i always do this: make him feel guilty for wanting to spend time with friends, also saying why cant i spend time with my friends(which i do! i see my friends more than i see him!). I dont understand why he says he loves me and all and that he misses me during the week, when the actual weekend comes he does not prioritise me even for a couple of hours? I do understand that work is important and i study hard to- but it just makes me so confuse to see that actually does take time off....but not with me... Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 well, either he is just no longer that into you but still wants sex or he's got himself a woman on the side. also, unless he's very immature his ignoring your texts was a power play on his part. mature people do not ignore their partners when in a relationship on purpose. they talk it out. I've had GF pull that crap on me after i'd called them on bad behavior & learned the hard way once they start doing that it's a power play & they were usually cheating on me. one day on the weekend is not too much time when it comes to a GF. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki Sahagin Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 My ex towards the end of our relationship NEVER went out with me on weekends at all. He said that was 'his' time althought prior to this we had spent time together WHENEVER we wanted to. He ended up dumping me. If your partner does not want to spend very much FREE time with you, its an indication they are either cheating or uninterested. Its a very cruel way of dragging you along. I would keep either: 1) address this issue with him or 2) dump him or 3) keep yourself busy all weekend so that the tables are turned and see how he reacts. Be less available and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted March 14, 2010 Share Posted March 14, 2010 I agree with the other posters. People in relationships make efforts to see each other no matter how busy they are. Yet when they put others as priority over their SO, there's definitely something wrong. In this picture, I think your boyfriend doesn't love you as much as he used to, but he's not ready to officially break up with you since you still contact him to sleep with him. He's complacent enough with the sex to keep you around. Sorry to say this, but if I were in your position I don't see the point of being with him despite a history of 2 years. You may have the title of bf/gf, but aside from that, he neither treats you nor respect you as his gf. Link to post Share on other sites
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