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Old 7th January 2010, 6:29 PM   #1
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relationship struggles?

So ive been with this guy for almost 7 months now. Im twisted on weather i need to break up with him or not. He is a really nice guy and all but im sensing that he is lying to me. He seems to always rather be with his friends. I confront him and he always has excuses to why he couldnt do anything with me. But then when we are together everything is perfect and he seems so into me and i can tell that he really wants to be with me. he has said he loves me but im not sure if I truly beleive it. I love him so much that i really dont want to end it. He tells me he will change and has promised me that we will spend alot more time together so many times but nothing has really changed. I dont know what to do, ive run out of options
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Old 7th January 2010, 6:41 PM   #2
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Maybe an example or two of what he does? Or a little more info, please. Like, what excuses does he give? How many times a week do you all see each other and how many times a week does he give the excuses?
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Old 7th January 2010, 6:44 PM   #3
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He comes home on the weekend from friday to sunday.. if im lucky i see him twice. He will tell me things like he didnt have his phone with him or that he fell asleep , or is sick.. i usualy get an excuse once a week
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Old 7th January 2010, 6:55 PM   #4
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So I take it he works out of town, and is home on weekends? Out of Friday, Saturday and Sunday you see him, maybe, twice? And out of those two times, at least one of them he gives you an excuse?

This has been going on for all 7 months you have been dating it sounds like, but your just sick of it, is that correct?
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Old 7th January 2010, 7:05 PM   #5
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Yeah he goes to school during the week , comes home friday, and most likely one of the days (either friday or saterday) he has an excuse to not see me. Im tired of his excuses, i feel like he doesnt like me and likes me at the same time , its weird.
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Old 7th January 2010, 7:09 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by miss0o View Post
I dont know what to do, ive run out of options
you have two options:
  1. stay with him knowing nothing will change
  2. find some one else
__________________
Indeed
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Old 7th January 2010, 7:15 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by miss0o View Post
Yeah he goes to school during the week , comes home friday, and most likely one of the days (either friday or saterday) he has an excuse to not see me. Im tired of his excuses, i feel like he doesnt like me and likes me at the same time , its weird.
So who initiates the date? I guess you know he's in town so you call him and then you all go out? Or do you you all talk all week and plan something for the weekend? (um... don't think so but still)

Does he ever call you and say "hey, let's do this together?" Sounds like you're taking the initiative and doing all the work...
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Old 7th January 2010, 7:20 PM   #8
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We text pretty much all the time... tells me things like cant wait to see you this weekend..and miss you... but yeah i guess im usualy the one to say so what are we doing tonight.. i feel like he likes me alot but just doesnt want to hang out that much? I dont know why ..doesnt make sense to me
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Old 7th January 2010, 7:27 PM   #9
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I think you should chill out one weekend and wait for him to initiate the date. Also, after all this time,it doesn't sound like you are in a steady relationship. I mean it doesn't sound like you can say, "Yes, he's my boyfriend." It's just this weekend situation that is leaving you insecure.

So is he your BF or is it not quite there yet?
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Old 7th January 2010, 7:34 PM   #10
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We say we are bf / gf . Its on facebook i guess ahah. When we go out together in public with firends or at a party we hold hands, kiss act all lovey dovey.. Its just the whole hanging out problem.. he is with his friends more then he is with me on the weekends i just dont understand
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Old 7th January 2010, 11:30 PM   #11
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if i were you i'd cool it a bit. don't initiate texts. do text back though. for a weekend or two defo do NOT initiate plans. see how he responds to this...if he fails to make plans with you after stating that he misses you etc., you have a right to be annoyed. go have fun with your girls. let him know what hes missing. if he doesnt miss you, hes doesnt even deserve you. then its decision time xx
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Old 7th January 2010, 11:44 PM   #12
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I think some of you are being a bit harsh. Fri/Sat/Sun and you're together two days out of three? I think that's pretty reasonable.

Yes, he should be courting you in the beginning...But I think at 7 months in, you start to get past the point of "who initiates what".

Maybe there's another reason underlying that's causing you to feel insecure??
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