SciGuy Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 About a month ago, I started hanging out with a girl in her lower 20's. She had recently broken up with her ex when we met and she stayed the night at my house on a few occasions...no sex. We saw each other ALOT the first couple weeks. The last couple weeks she started to become very flaky (not calling back when she said she would, failing to show up places, etc). Anyway, I called her out on it and asked her if she considered us "dating" or "friends". She said that she would rather stay friends at this time as she just got out of a relationship. She did tell me that she is "interested" in me. I told her that I didn't want to be only friends and that she should get ahold of me if/when she is interested in dating. So, the ball is in her court. But, I'm wondering if I made the right decision. Maybe I should hang around as a friend for awhile and see how it plays out. She did JUST break up with her boyfriend and that's understandable. But, she is young and I'm not sure that I can put up with the games. It's been about five days and I have yet to hear from her. Any suggestions? Is this behavior expected from a girl her age? Should I stand my ground here? Link to post Share on other sites
moman Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 The fact that you had to ask that question shows major trouble. She's just not into you, so I'd forget about her and not contact her again. Link to post Share on other sites
lora22 Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 I'd say you probably made the right decision (just curious, but how old are you?). It sounds like maybe you were something of a rebound - she was possibly having a tough time with her break up and you were there for her (sleepovers, no sex?? I bet there was cuddling though). So, you're absolutely right that to put the ball in her court, just make sure you LEAVE IT THERE. Don't contact her again. Wait and see. Better yet, start looking elsewhere (possibly for someone closer to your own age?? IDK??). Link to post Share on other sites
Author SciGuy Posted June 25, 2009 Author Share Posted June 25, 2009 I'm 31. Yea, I thought about the whole rebound thing. I guess I was just being a bit naive. But, she was only with this last guy for a few months and rarely saw him so I'm not sure she was that affected by the break-up. Actually, she acted as if she couldn't stand him...hmm. I agree with dating closer to my age. This kind of just happened. Link to post Share on other sites
lora22 Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 I'm 31. Yea, I thought about the whole rebound thing. I guess I was just being a bit naive. But, she was only with this last guy for a few months and rarely saw him so I'm not sure she was that affected by the break-up. Actually, she acted as if she couldn't stand him...hmm. I agree with dating closer to my age. This kind of just happened. Even though she was only with him for a few months, you don't know how strongly she felt about him (I'm guessing strongly if she was with him for months, but rarely saw him); and how long she knew him before they started dating. Also (she'd have to be crazy to lie), but you don't know that she told you the truth about him and their relationship. Acting like she couldn't stand him MIGHT be a "cover-up" - again, you don't really know anything other than what she chooses to tell you. I don't think there's anything wrong with dating someone younger than you, but in this particular instance it sounds like maybe she's a little immature for what you're looking for. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted June 25, 2009 Share Posted June 25, 2009 The fact that you had to ask that question shows major trouble. She's just not into you, so I'd forget about her and not contact her again. Agreed... When you have to ask, forget about it. That has nothing to do with age- it's life. People in general can be flaky- but young 20's is flaky at its best. Link to post Share on other sites
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