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Online Dating: Relationship gone "sour" Being friends afterwards...?


JMAY24

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Hi

 

I don't know if anybody here has gone through the same feelings & experiences I'm having now so it would be great to have some feedback.

 

I've reached to a state of numbess over relationships after my breakup , but It still hurts thinking about how i got treated and how i treated my ex.

 

So heres the story I met a girl online I'm in London and she's in Los Angeles and she was dating someone at the time she actually left him to pursue a relationship with me. And things were great we spent time talking to eachother on the phone and online for about 5 months and we constantly sent pictures and so i think its fair to say there was alot of physical and emotional attraction on both our parts. I also helped emotionally, i gave her alot of support to achieve what she wanted to do in terms of her career as she went back to school and my family in L.A. helped her with a job position which she took up and even gave up smoking for a while even though i didn't force her to.

 

Until one say she comes out and says she shared a moment with one of her friends and she decides she can't continue our relationship. I was upset and distressed and then after a week of trying to i guess make her get back with me i decided to stop and accept she didn't want to be with me. But i wanted to see if things would be different if she physically saw me. So i flew out 2 weeks after to Los Angeles and she turned up at the airport and the first day i saw her we kissed shared afew moments and bonded. After a week of doing that and getting lost in the moment she tells me how guilty she feels getting close to me even though shes with a new guy (the guy i mentioned before) and i just flip out and lose it and to make matters worse i got high and drunk that night with her and her friends so then i got deperate and burst into tears telling her my feelings when i was alone with her. (i blame that on being high though! :laugh:)

 

That was the last time i saw her i said a goodbye there and then but then i left 2 weeks later to go back to London. But before i took my flight she sent me an email asking if we could be friends and that she wanted me to meet her new boyfriend which made me angry for some reason. That was really hard and for some reason 3 months on i'm feeling really lousy i replied to her email saying we could be friends and asking her if she wanted me to tell her whenever i'm in L.A. since i'll be back ther in 3 months time. And i haven't heard from her. I haven't tried to contact her since my email reply about 2-3 months ago. I know Los Angeles will be a big part of my life in the future as i plan on spending time studying there in about a year and since i have alot of family there i intend to visit every 4 months or so, so that makes things abit harder.

 

A part of me wants to be friends with her, a part of me still really loves her but a part of me hates her aswell, and a big part of me just wants to find out how shes doing... I know today i'm feeling lousy because i got curious and visited a playlist site we built together online months ago and saw she deleted it so i guess i think i know where i stand but i would love some advice and feedback?

 

Thanks!

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You'reasian

I've been told that women in the L.A. area are shallow and flaky, but otherwise fun and attractive.

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xpaperxcutx

I think you'll find new potential gfs in LA. Letting someone who's not physically present in your life affect you is too weak on your part.

 

Edit: And no, you cannot be friends with her. Letting her go would mean moving on. You have a future ahead of you, and you don't want your feelings about her get in the way.

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