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Insecure men who like to cut women down


MeaganRaye

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okay, I knew a guy who said that whenever a woman had high self esteem he would put her down. I asked him why and he said, "I don't know. I just don't like females walking around with a big head."

 

If you were confident and made remarks like, "I am pretty and attractive." He would get very irritated. Once, I said something about how I had an hourglass figure and he said, "I know women who have better figures than you do you don't even have the most curvy body out there.":( I was taken back and he sounded so angry when he said that.

 

Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

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mr.dream merchant

He sounds like he just wants to rain on every strong attractive women's parade. Maybe one did him dirty in his past and he's taking it out on the rest of the bunch? Or he's just a dick.

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Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

 

That's just the way they are and that's their fault. IT'S YOUR FAULT for hanging around with them. The instant you find someone has this attitude, find the nearest route away from their proximity.

 

It's not an ego thing as much as it's a lack of class thing and an ignorance thing.

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I don't know..

 

But why are you going around telling people how hot you are, or describing your figure ? That seems insecure.

 

If I told women "Wow, I have a great body" I would expect some negative comments as well.

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I don't know..

 

But why are you going around telling people how hot you are, or describing your figure ? That seems insecure.

 

If I told women "Wow, I have a great body" I would expect some negative comments as well.

We were talking about weight and body shapes and I mentioned that I had an hourglass figure. I was not bragging at all

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If you were confident and made remarks like, "I am pretty and attractive." He would get very irritated. Once, I said something about how I had an hourglass figure

 

I guess it kind of flowed together, as you stated someone might make the remark "I am pretty and attractive". I mean who goes around saying that about themselves?

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AlektraClementine

Didn't her friend admit to liking to cut women down who have self esteem?

 

Isn't that that question the OP asked?

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I guess it kind of flowed together, as you stated someone might make the remark "I am pretty and attractive". I mean who goes around saying that about themselves?

What the hell does it matter to the original point? The guy admitted he was cutting women down. Stay focused here, man.

 

Oh, wait, I get it.... You're being ironic by doing the same thing!!!! Cool! Sorry dude, I totally missed that! Nice job...

 

Anyway, back to the OP, I think it goes back to what you said: insecurity. Someone who does not feel strong or confident feels threatened by someone else who is. Someone who lacks self-confidence can gain some - false confidence, that is - by dragging someone else down. He gets a sense of power, only it's power "over" someone else, as opposed to personal power, so ultimately, when he goes back home, he still doesn't end up with any more power or confidence within the sphere of his own life.

 

Essentially an emotional vampire.

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I guess it kind of flowed together, as you stated someone might make the remark "I am pretty and attractive". I mean who goes around saying that about themselves?

 

I don't go around saying things like that because I don't have the most self esteem in the world. But I can think of a lot of conversations where people have stated that they are attractive and have good qualities to find a mate

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There's also the whole PUA philosophy which stipulates that if you make a women feel vulnerable, she will therefore seek further validation from you.

 

Problem with that it's that it only works on insecure women - and yes, some women who put a lot of emphasis on how great they look can be insecure.

 

I don't think this is what you were doing by saying you had an hourglass figure however and i agree with Tony: avoid people who feel entitled to cut others down and the quality of your life and social networks will greatly improve.

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Jersey Shortie

This isn't a simple matter or the normal male ego. Male ego is when your boyfriend tells you he just washed your car and you gush all over him about how great a guy he is. This guy is a moron with very low self-esteem. Any person, regardless of gener, that puts other people down, feels more hate about themselves then others. People who make fun of fat people, people who make fun of people of different nationalities or religion, girls who are catty about other girls..I don't care what it is. Anyone who feels the need to make derogatory comments about people, regardless of their looks or station in life, has alot going on inside that makes them feel bad about themselves first. They hide it very well.

 

I hope you are not hanging out with this guy.

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okay, I knew a guy who said that whenever a woman had high self esteem he would put her down. I asked him why and he said, "I don't know. I just don't like females walking around with a big head."

 

If you were confident and made remarks like, "I am pretty and attractive." He would get very irritated. Once, I said something about how I had an hourglass figure and he said, "I know women who have better figures than you do you don't even have the most curvy body out there.":( I was taken back and he sounded so angry when he said that.

 

Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

 

I would put down anybody (man or a woman) who walks around telling people "Look at me, look ar my hourglass figure", literally or figuratively.

 

Perhaps you're just pissing him off :). There is a big difference between having an actual self esteem and being a cocky mess;).

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I would put down anybody (man or a woman) who walks around telling people "Look at me, look ar my hourglass figure", literally or figuratively.

 

Perhaps you're just pissing him off :). There is a big difference between having an actual self esteem and being a cocky mess;).

Why would you need to cut that person down though for saying that? Are they making you feel bad by pointing out their own positive attributes?

 

Besides, that is not even how the scenario played out.

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Why would you need to cut that person down though for saying that? Are they making you feel bad by pointing out their own positive attributes?

 

Besides, that is not even how the scenario played out.

 

Well, I have a lot of positive attributes too, but I wouldn't walk around telling people about them because I'd think that it's distasteful; and so that'd be my reaction if i saw somebody else yapping around about how awesome they are. I would not necessarily say anything, but will certainly roll my eyes and be "Beyootch, puhleeze" :).

 

I'm speakink in generalities, of course, there sure are some instances where it may be approrpiate, but still, other than jokingly saying "Yeah, baby, I'm a badass", there aren't that many situations where you could go on and on without running the risk of irritating most people.

 

And then there is also the "Sex and the city" personality, which really needs to be put down - and I mean literally, in the vet clinic :lmao:.

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Well, I have a lot of positive attributes too, but I wouldn't walk around telling people about them because I'd think that it's distasteful; and so that'd be my reaction if i saw somebody else yapping around about how awesome they are. I would not necessarily say anything, but will certainly roll my eyes and be "Beyootch, puhleeze" :).

 

I'm speakink in generalities, of course, there sure are some instances where it may be approrpiate, but still, other than jokingly saying "Yeah, baby, I'm a badass", there aren't that many situations where you could go on and on without running the risk of irritating most people.

 

And then there is also the "Sex and the city" personality, which really needs to be put down - and I mean literally, in the vet clinic :lmao:.

 

To mention that you have an hourglass figure is bragging? How so? Is it because an hourglass figure is a desirable shape? I don't get it. We were discussing weight and exercise and I mentioned that I was an hourglass and talked about the areas that the weight goes when I gain lbs. I was NOT bragging, just stating a fact. If I were an apple, I would have said it, if I were a pear I would have said it and so on..

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Ok the guy is a jerk. Thread closed. lol

 

I mean nobody was there. Some people to brag about themselves constantly, and it gets old. Obviously if someone puts you down for no reason they are a jerk.

 

I think women are going to put you down 100 times more often than men would.

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Chicago_Guy
I don't know..

 

But why are you going around telling people how hot you are, or describing your figure ? That seems insecure.

 

If I told women "Wow, I have a great body" I would expect some negative comments as well.

 

Yes, a woman who goes on and on about how hot she thinks she is can very annoying.

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You'reasian
okay, I knew a guy who said that whenever a woman had high self esteem he would put her down. I asked him why and he said, "I don't know. I just don't like females walking around with a big head."

 

If you were confident and made remarks like, "I am pretty and attractive." He would get very irritated. Once, I said something about how I had an hourglass figure and he said, "I know women who have better figures than you do you don't even have the most curvy body out there.":( I was taken back and he sounded so angry when he said that.

 

Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

 

Beautiful people know they are beautiful. They usually don't talk about it. Women are more self-conscious and might need a little external validation - but it can come across the wrong way depending on the person involved.

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Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

 

Some of these PUA dickweeds say that's a technique to use, for whatever that's worth.

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if a man ever does that just turn it back on him and see how he reacts. that's a pretty good way of judging whether he is really a tosspot.

 

a guy once turned to me on a second date and said 'of course you know that you are pretty, right?' in an accusing tone and when I didn't respond (since it was a stupid thing to ask) he repeated the question. so I just said 'why, do you think you are ugly yourself? what's your point?'

 

he dropped that nonsense after that. it's insecurity and it's ridiculous

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Trialbyfire
okay, I knew a guy who said that whenever a woman had high self esteem he would put her down. I asked him why and he said, "I don't know. I just don't like females walking around with a big head."

 

If you were confident and made remarks like, "I am pretty and attractive." He would get very irritated. Once, I said something about how I had an hourglass figure and he said, "I know women who have better figures than you do you don't even have the most curvy body out there.":( I was taken back and he sounded so angry when he said that.

 

Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

Why wouldn't you have challenged him on it, the times he did this? The easiest way to do that is to straight out ask him why he's so insecure.
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You'reasian

If your girl is making a comment about her curviness, use it as a chance to flirt with her. I don't know about you guys, but life is busy and hectic and all the little things count - so if she were to say something about herself being curvy, you could chime in with

 

"Ma'am, I'm gonna have to search those curves. Are you sure you're not a terrorist...because you've got some BOMBS strapped to your chest!!!"

 

or

 

"Your curves are staring at me and I can't stop them. What should I do?"

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Ruby Slippers

This man is deeply insecure and threatened by attractive, confident woman. He thinks that by insulting them he can "bring them down to his level". The sad thing is his behavior will only alienate him from quality women.

 

Though he was supportive for the most part, my ex occasionally made these mean comments about me, just out of nowhere. Months later, he admitted he was jealous of my intelligence and talents and was worried he couldn't keep up with me. :o

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Why are some men insecure that they feel the need to tear down women who realize their worth? Is it an ego thing?

 

You answered your own question, they are insecure.

 

It's not the sole province of men, however. Many PEOPLE are like this.

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