Jump to content

Happiness and relief... almost...


WhyYouWanna

Recommended Posts

I'm 21 next month and I've been in a relationship with a girl (Girl A, who's also my age) for 4 and half years. We've been going through a bad time since last christmas and just lately it's got even worse.

 

As well as this, my parents are currently going through a divorce, which involved my mom having an affair and me finding out and everything coming to the surface.

 

Girl A puts me through absolute hell if I'm being honest and up until now I've been too blind to see it. Valentine's Day this year was a classic example, I paid a small fortune to go out for a meal for the two of us in the best place in the area, and she did nothing but argue with me. No matter what I do, or how high she's makes me jump, it's never high enough and I'm fed up of having the crap I've had to put up with in the last past 9 months. I finally feel like I can think clear and realise the problem isn't with me.

 

I've always tried to be the one to make things ok with arguments because I didn't want to loose her. I never thought I'd get anyone I'd like or love. She's always moaning I don't do enough for her, which is absolute rubbish because I spoil her, but nothing ever seems to be enough. Reminds me of my mom if I'm being honest, and at this point I hate my mom for what she's done accross my dad, myself and my younger brother.

 

The toppers came about when her friend asked her to go on holiday a few weeks ago for a week with her and her parents and grandparents. I asked her not to go because I really needed her here and thought we could have gone away together, but in the end she went, which was last sunday.

 

I spoke to her on Saturday and she turned around and said "if we're honest this has been over for ages now" and "you're a free man" - to that the penny finally dropped.

 

I was on Facebook latter that night and got talking to a primary school friend (Girl B) who I used to live in the same street as. We lost contact when I went to high school and moved house at the same time. She's 19 in October and like myself, doing very well for herself.

 

She asked me to meet her in a club where she was going to be for a work college's leaving party, and I agreed.

 

The moment I saw her she hugged me and we got on like a house on fire! It was like the 9 years I hadn't seen her in hadn't existed. Girl A went on holiday and I've not heard from her since but I picked up and went out with Girl B the night after and we kissed. The same thing happened last night and I'm smitted it's unreal!

 

We have so much in common, we both have good jobs and are both very well driven, we enjoy the same things and the conversation never stops and even when we're apart we're constantly texting. She's very career driven (like myself) and hasn't had a hugely serious relationship, and tells me no one's ever treated her like I have.

 

She keeps saying to me that she thought I'd never look twice at her, but she's stunning and exactly what I find attractive in women.

 

I haven't been this happy in ages, but my biggest fear is that she'll think she's just the "rebound girl" when she's really not. Things genuinely happened in the order above, it was very much coincidence I got talking to Girl B. I really think a lot of her. Also, what do I say to Girl A when she comes back?

 

I want to finally end the relationship with Girl A because I told her, "me or this holiday" and she chose the holiday. I know it sounds selfish, but in my opinion I think it was selfish of her to go knowing how much I wanted to go away with her and what was going on in my life at home. I'm not going to say anything about Girl B because I don't want to hurt her, and I don't think I've cheated when she told me "I'm a free man" and "this has been over for ages".

 

It's almost like the final straw. The straw that broke the cammels back. But I almost feel a little bit guilty, but then I remember the sleepless nights not knowing what was going to happen next in the relationship with Girl A.

 

I've told Girl B everything and she's fine with it. I've told her that I can't make promises to her (as much as I think I will, but I said that just in case) but I really like her. A lot!

 

Any thoughts? Am I being a selfish ass?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Girl A already dumped you, and I think you're bitter.

 

Long story short, there's no need to contact girl A, give yourself a bit of time to settle before going for girl B.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with papercuts, besides girl be is fine with the situation and seems like she really likes you too so she most likely wont mind waiting for a bit while you sort this whole thing out.

 

Even if you dont want it to be completely over with girl A(and it seems like you dont or you still love her) you guys definitly need a break. She is being selfish by choosing the holiday over you but it shows that she needs space too.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Girl A doesn't appreciate you. She has taken you for granted.

 

Girl B is a rebound and you need to take a step back before you get to involved with her. Take it slow and find out if you really like her or if your just using her because of your bruised feelings.

 

Forget girl A. You owe her nothing.

Link to post
Share on other sites
rod_in_gtown

Forget girl A. what a waste of space she is... Enjoy Girl B and take it easy... Like girl A said, You're a free man.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Thanks for everyone's replies.

 

Had a great week with Girl B, but I'm set to meet Girl A tonight and "talk". She' unaware of Girl B, and I intend to keep it that way, but what on earth do I say?

 

I want to walk away, but it's so hard because every time I look at a photo or something it all comes back to me.

 

She has been texting me while she's been away, once was to say "enjoy life I hope your happy single", another was to say "I really love you" and then another was to talk about meeting up... it just doesn't make sense at all and it's driving me nuts!

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...