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Wandering eyes....


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Hi everyone. I've been dating my boyfriend for a little over 7 months now, and have truely grown to love him and vice versa. We have an amazing, loving relationship that is something I can honestly say I never experinced. In the beginning he was a little insecure over the fact that I had lots of male friends, but eventually that problem was resolved and the closer we've gotten the less threatened he feels about it. (Besides the fact that I no longer hang out with all these guy friends.)

 

I was never the one to be insecure. At all. In fact, I would point out other beautiful women and never get jealous if he did the same. He never enjoyed hearing ME comment on attractive men, however.

 

Lately, I HAVE grown insecure! It all began with a comment he made casually about his cousin's former gf and how hot she looked when they were all in his cousin's pool. He even went so far as to point out her 'hard nipples' and the fact he may have popped an erection as she emerged from the water.

 

I was outraged, much to his surprise, and nearly cancelled our plans for the night. He apologized profusely and eventually I got over it. I never minded his remarks over another woman's hotness but I felt he crossed the line with that particular comment. He later admitted he was immature and inappropriate and there are certain things you say in front of your guy friends, not your girlfriend.

 

The thing is, ever since then I feel myself get annoyed and upset when he checks out other women. Even if it's on TV! I don't even like holding his hand or displaying any kind of affection in public with him because I feel he is looking at other women from the corner of his eye and I don't want to look like a fool.

 

The lustful way he described that other woman really impacted me. And I was bothered to realize that he probably does see other women in a lustful light. I know this is inevitable, he's a guy and I won't lie and say I don't notice attractive men. And I am aware of the fact that he is very visually stimulated. The reason WE started dating was because he saw a picture of me at a mutual friend's house and insisted the friend introduce us. He is extrememly physically attracted to me, but I always feel the need to make myself better, like go on a diet, tanning and doing an extra set of lunges each night.

 

I know this is unhealthy and as silly as silly comes.. and he treats me with the utmost respect and love.. but I am nearly obsessed with making sure I stay pretty enough for him.

 

How do I get a grip and just get over it?

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