I'm not in love anymore :(

[justsotiredofitall]

I've been living with my boyfriend for over a year now. I thought he was 'the one'. From the beginning I've had a lot of problems with his past (not necessarily all the girls he's been with, but the way he treated them). I truly believe he is a narcissist. He doesn't care about anyone except himself and will admit it.

 

I was so just so happy to have a boyfriend (he's my first 'real' boyfriend) that I overlooked a lot of his flaws. I feel like I've grown up so much and I just don't even respect him anymore. He constantly begs to borrow my credit cards to purchase things and throws a temper fit if he doesn't get what he wants. I've told him I feel more like his Mom than a girlfriend. I clean house for him. I do his laundry. I cook for him. I do everything he wants and I get nothing in return. No affection, no time, I'm lucky if he even notices me at all. He seriously comes home from work asks where his food is and plays video games until it's time for bed. He's 24 years old!

 

I've recently decided to go back to school. He told me that I'm stupid for doing it and I'm just a loser that will never finish. The only reason I'm with him is because I need a place to live. I don't make enough money to support myself (hence why I'm going back to school for a better job). I don't want to move back in with my parents because I feel like a failure for this relationship not working, even though I can't find anywhere that I'm at fault. I've tried and tried, but obviously he is too immature for a serious relationship.

 

Has anyone stayed in a relationship like this until they got on their feet enough to move on? I don't love him anymore...I don't even like being around him. His jokes aren't funny anymore. I don't even think he's attractive anymore, he's just so ugly on the inside that I can't stand it when he touches me. But there is a part of me that really wants him to change and things to be the way I thought they could be...I know it isn't possible...It just hurts when you realize the person you feel in love never really existed and you're left with such a jerk!

[kribby]

I've been living with my boyfriend for over a year now. I thought he was 'the one'. From the beginning I've had a lot of problems with his past (not necessarily all the girls he's been with, but the way he treated them). I truly believe he is a narcissist. He doesn't care about anyone except himself and will admit it.

 

I was so just so happy to have a boyfriend (he's my first 'real' boyfriend) that I overlooked a lot of his flaws. I feel like I've grown up so much and I just don't even respect him anymore. He constantly begs to borrow my credit cards to purchase things and throws a temper fit if he doesn't get what he wants. I've told him I feel more like his Mom than a girlfriend. I clean house for him. I do his laundry. I cook for him. I do everything he wants and I get nothing in return. No affection, no time, I'm lucky if he even notices me at all. He seriously comes home from work asks where his food is and plays video games until it's time for bed. He's 24 years old!

 

I've recently decided to go back to school. He told me that I'm stupid for doing it and I'm just a loser that will never finish. The only reason I'm with him is because I need a place to live. I don't make enough money to support myself (hence why I'm going back to school for a better job). I don't want to move back in with my parents because I feel like a failure for this relationship not working, even though I can't find anywhere that I'm at fault. I've tried and tried, but obviously he is too immature for a serious relationship.

 

Has anyone stayed in a relationship like this until they got on their feet enough to move on? I don't love him anymore...I don't even like being around him. His jokes aren't funny anymore. I don't even think he's attractive anymore, he's just so ugly on the inside that I can't stand it when he touches me. But there is a part of me that really wants him to change and things to be the way I thought they could be...I know it isn't possible...It just hurts when you realize the person you feel in love never really existed and you're left with such a jerk!

 

 

You are kidding me! Are you really economically dependent on this man or are you deluding yourself????

 

You have clearly stated that you have a place to go (your parents). Are you going to let your pride get in the way of you making necessary (good) changes for you life?

 

What makes you think that just because this relationship (from the way you describe it) is a dismal failure that you are automatically a failure? Do you have any idea how unlikely it is that your first relationship would be the 'forever' one?

 

And you know... if you really don't want to go back to your parents there are other options... talk to friends-- talk to family...get their take on things...

 

from my quickie thoughts....

 

you could-- apply for school--- get student loans and get a place...

 

get a roommate and a place...

live with another family member and pay rent...

look in the newspaper for a room for rent or apt. for rent...

 

Good lord-- have you heard the saying 'the world is your oyster' lately???? It truly is, you know, your oyster.... though oysters are a bit grimy and gross... how about 'the world is your apple-- so take a bite out of it?'

 

 

-K

[Guest]

Seriously. You are correct in how you feel. Get out now. Nobody who loves anybody would ever do this to their lady. Hey, I'm all for video games, but you don't treat your lady bad EVER. This has abuse written all over it and you need to go while you can.

 

Why would you even think about staying with somebody who makes you feel sick when he touches you? You feel that way because of how he's been treating you. You are a beautiful woman with a future and a whole lot of love to give, so why not give it to a man worthy of it? You WILL find that guy, I am confident. You are too. Do not waste anymore time with this guy. It is a no-brainer!