My Anxiety in my relationship

[hugznkisses21]

HI Everyone…

 

First and foremost I want to say that I have been diagnosed with anxiety issues and have seen a canceller to help me with these…

 

I have been in my relationship 4 mth now as of Monday. This is a very different relationship then what I was in before for 3 years because I see my bf now 3-4 times a week. Which is great. The one struggle I am having is anxiety within my relationship.

 

Is it normal for him to slip into a comfort zone after 4 mths – it seems he doesn’t get super excited and affectionate when he sees me like he used to and I find he doesn’t go out of his way to really tell me how he feels or compliments me. Due to my anxiety I worry that I am no longer attractive to him or he is pulling away.

 

He told me he loves me about a mth ago and it was wonderful. I think this all started around after that – mentally is he at that stage where she knows how I feel – I can settle now? I believe in communicating with him and he thinks that is very important as well – so I expressed this to him and it hurts him to think that I would think he isn’t interested – as much as he said he would try I think deep down he doesn’t understand.

 

He is the type that likes things to be just so and doesn’t like upset – so he is comfortable with us and if there isn’t a huge upset he thinks everything is fine

 

Can anyone help me with these feelings?

 

I want to say I love him with all I have and I want to have a great future with him. He is a wonderful man 

[Cyrus9789]

Keep seeing your therapist. You are thinking wayyyy too much.

[caring guy]

Hi Huggznkises

I empathise with you, i suffer General Anxiety Disorder & see a therapist & a doctor that supplies my anti anxiety meds that work to an extent with side affects!

Anxiety & panic attacks ended my previous relationship as i was thinking too much, & wasn't always emotionally there! Anxiety can make you think about your needs to make you feel ok & therefore distancing yourself from your partner.

My ex had kids & that made it worse.

Keep seeing your therapist & try & talk to your guy about your issues & if he's realy the one for you he won't back off & will understand!

take care

cg

[elijahBailey]

hugznkisses, what's happening with him is absolutely normal.....and it's absolutely normal.....and it's absolutely normal !!!

 

As for me, the excitement usually dies off anywhere between 2weeks to 3months. Ask anyone who's been in a long-term relationship.

 

If you seek only to preserve the initial excitement in the relationship, you're bound to be disappointed. You should look into exploring other areas that can build the relationship up.

 

Just curious, is this your first relationship?

[evan]

Due to my anxiety I worry that I am no longer attractive to him or he is pulling away.

Let's put it this way, if you know it's because of your problems with anxiety, do you think you really have anything to worry about?

[hugznkisses21]

Hi there,

 

Thanks for your replys they have been super helpful

 

This is not my first relationship. I was with my ex for almost 3 years prior - in between my currrent relationship and my ex I just casually dated.

 

Ive just been keeping busy and trying not to over think it too much

[GiftGuide]

The first few months you are in the honey moon stage. I did the exact same thing to my girlfriend. I used to get her small thoughtful gifts or put off work to meet her an hour away. These things slowly stopped happening after a while and work started catching up. I knew I was not going all out like I used to but didn't seem like a big problem to me. I still love her just as much.

 

I over think things too; so I can see why this would really bother you. Like other posters have said it's just normal. Try to focus on other things in your life to get your mind off of it.

 

Good Luck