friend/co-worker

[Irene]

..I have this friend although she calls me her best friend, I have to tell you she is my friend JUST not a best friend.although we can speak our personal guts out to one another (I don't) she in return believes she is right on some personal issues..She' single, in AA and has a grown child with diabilites (has ADD ) and in the 12 grade..thing is, she always complains on how lazy her child is and how he just want to stay in the bedroom (they live in apt) ..She says he hates brushing his teeth,hates bathing, has acne and hates taking care of his face and justs promises he'll do things if she buys him (coca-cola),his addiction is drinking sodas..She is a petite lady and small..her child is a growing kid and I figure if she complains about him,first of all she doesn't give him any chores to do and doesn't have enough comunication because she says he doesn't want to hear it,YET she doesn't press him on going anywhere on errands to stores and such because she makes him feel insecure about his face and so he rather not go anywhere as I hear it..What I did tell her is that a child's character/demeanor refelects back on the parent...She doens't even have hi take out the garbage or check mail so I don't feel it's his fault that his mom is embarrassed, she just doesn't sit and have a heart to heart talk with her son now 19 (mentaly 15) or have lunche or dinner together if she cooks at all sometimes..it's sad ..all she tell me BUT i still say she didn't guide him in the right direction nor did she lay out any rules on growing up nor did she show a bonding of mother-son relationhip ..all I ever hear is her complaining that he doesn't want to do anything.and that he says he is 19 and old enough can't wait to live his own life YET she is all he knows and he is mentally a little kid with no direction..He can work BUT she doesn't even try to even attempt him to apply himself ever and now 19 he says she cannot make him to work..hmmmmmmm..Plus she rather he be home too,so I am puzzled..When she is fed up with him she says she can't wait for his to be on his own..BUT how?..she is all he knows in life..nothing outside the home other than school and home..thanks for lettin me vent!