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Super complicated friend/cousin/other friend cheating...long


Friendship Having issues with a friend? Get it off your chest!

Old 14th March 2006, 3:54 PM   #1
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Super complicated friend/cousin/other friend cheating...long

So my cousin, Adam, has been dating Trish for just over 2 years. I have never really liked her. There's nothing in particular, we just have nothing to talk about. We by no means hate eachother or anything. I never thought their relationship would last. They've been having problems since month 3 of their relationship. She never wants to have sex and he absolutely has to have it every day. He informed her of this before they started dating. He's had problems with girls in the past because of it. She said she would NOT have that problem and never has(that was a lie).

Katie is one of our friends. She is married and has a son. She just left her husband 11 days ago. There were major problems and she needed to leave.

Adam invited her to come stay with he and Trish until she could get things sorted out and get back on her feet. Katie consideres Adam her best friend, and vice-versa. Katie and I have become very close and that is how I am in the middle of this situation.

The day Katie left her husband, she went over to Adam's house with her things. Adam and Trish were fighting about the same things as usual. Adam decided not to go out with all of us that night(we were going dancing). At the bar Trish drank WAAAAAYY too much(as per usual), and was being totally inappropriate with guys there and we though we saw her kiss one, but we don't know for sure. We brought Trish home and she passed out. I went home, and Katie decided to tell Adam what Trish had done that night. Trish left and went to her mom's the next day to avoid the fighting.
While Trish was gone Adam and Katie ended up having sex....not just once, but pretty much pretending they were a couple. Adam was telling her that he was going to break up with Trish and that he love Katie so much and wants to be with her. Then Trish came home....

Katie, me and a couple other people went out for the day. When we came back to Adam's it was as if NOTHING had happened. Katie was crushed.
Adam didn't know anyone knew except Katie and him.

Adam talked to Katie later on and told her that he was now confused and didn't know what he wanted, but that they could NOT tell Trish. She is not a very strong person and he feels guilty and feels like he now owes it to her to try to make their relationship work. Meanwhile, Katie is having to live with the both of them!

When Trish is gone Adam makes moves on Katie and tells her he "can't help it", it "feels so right", etc... He says he doesn't regret any of it.

Katie has now been standoffish to Trish and Trish is getting REALLY upset. I think she might think Katie's being like that because she's been hanging out with me more or something.

Adam has been leading Katie on, at a time when she has WAY more important things to worry about. He tells my boyfriend(they've been friends FOREVER), that he never had any intention of dating Katie because she has a kid, and he never wants any. Everyone knew that already, including Katie, but Adam told her that that was not the problem.

It has been over a week now and Adam is still leading Katie on and acting like everything is fine with Trish, when she's around.

I don't like hanging out with them anymore. It weird and uncomfortable.
I've tried telling Katie that Adam may not have the intentions he says he does.
Adam even asked Katie to have a 3-way relationship. She took it as though he were kind of kidding. I really don't think he was.
No one is going to tell Trish. I may not like her, but I don't think anyone deserves this, whether you don't want to have sex or do.
Adam just yells at me if I try to talk to him about it.
What should I do?!?!?! I don't want to lose Katie as a friend, and Adam's family. I am at a loss. It is putting a huge stress on our group of friends! we are all sooo close and this could ruin it.

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Old 14th March 2006, 4:54 PM   #2
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Adam is a jerk and he doesn't deserve neither Trish nor Katie. If you truly care about Katie (and Trish to a lesser extent), you guys should get all of them together and uncover Adam's lies. The girls deserve to know what kind of man are they dealing with.

-E
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Old 14th March 2006, 6:19 PM   #3
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If it gets back to Katie's husband that she did this, before they were divorced or anything, can it effect custody or child support or anything like that?
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