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Can't forgive my friend for euthanizing her dog


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Her little Yorkshire was 9 years old. This breed lives easily up to 14-16 sometimes more.

 

A little bump appeared on her head and it occasionally bled. She took her to the vet and vet said she needed a test to verify if it was malign or benign. The operation and the test would have cost around $500-$600.

 

Now, my friend isn't struggling financially. She's a bank manager and vacations to Mexico and Cuba 3 times a year and she eats at restaurants every weekends.

 

She decided she was not gonna shed $500 on her 9 year old dog and had her euthanized.

 

She did not tell me. I learn it through my daughter. My friend knew exactly what I thought of her cold heart toward an animal she had own for 9 years and only needed a bit of medical care.

 

Last week to my horror, she got another dog. Another Yorkshire she bought at a breeder and probably shed 2K to purchase it.

 

She has the audacity to send me pictures of the new pup and tells me how excited she is.

 

I simply replied: why don't you purchase a medical insurance this time so when she needs care you won't have to put her down.

 

I have this huge ball of resentment in my stomach.

 

My BF tells me I am too sensitive when it comes to dogs What do you think? am I?

Edited by Gaeta
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honestly, I am usually quite conservative when it comes to medical treatment - my background is in farm animals before pets. Never been a been a big fan of invasive procedures or cancer treatments.... That said.

 

That is total bullsh't!!! Even if she didn't want the lesion tested / cancer treatments, they could have removed it for a small fee and just kept a watch / kept the dog comfortable. Doesn't sound like it was something that was severely affecting the animals quality of life.

 

I am surprised the vet agreed to euthanize.

 

And what puppy mill did she get the new dog from?! What the hell sort of breeder would sell to a home knowing they killed their last pet over a $500 vet bill?

 

Sure, she could have lied to the breeder, but good breeders require references, including one from her veterinarian.

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Are you sure the dog was not in pain/suffering or having other issues?

 

I saw her dog on regular basis, she was a happy little dog. Only issue she kept scratching her head and made her bump bleed.

 

The vet told her if it's cancer it would need an even more invasive operation and treatment etc, (of course) but my friend did not even want to know if it was cancer. She wanted the dog and her bleeding bump gone. And if it was cancer, she could have simply kept her alive during those last months, maybe couple of years where she would still have had a good quality of life.

 

Of course she got the new pup at a backyard breeder.

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lionlover1973

Ugh, that breaks my heart.

 

I would give one of my kidneys for my dog. But that's just me.

 

I could understand if the dog was/would be suffering, but jeez - that's kind of a rash decision when the issue could have been something completely benign.

 

Poor dog. :(

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I saw her dog on regular basis, she was a happy little dog. Only issue she kept scratching her head and made her bump bleed.

 

The vet told her if it's cancer it would need an even more invasive operation and treatment etc, (of course) but my friend did not even want to know if it was cancer. She wanted the dog and her bleeding bump gone. And if it was cancer, she could have simply kept her alive during those last months, maybe couple of years where she would still have had a good quality of life.

 

Of course she got the new pup at a backyard breeder.

 

yuck and yuck :(

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My dog had some healthy issues last year and it cost me a couple of thousands to have him diagnosed. Now he is ok but on 2 different medication for the rest of his life. The medications do not cost much. I remember her telling me she would not pay that kind of money on her dog and her dog could disappear she would not shed a tear, she can't get attached to animals. I wonder why get any pets at all then.

 

Then after she had her dog euthanized she went crying on FB for her loss. It was SO freaking fake !! I stayed off FB for 2 weeks just so I don't see this charade.

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lionlover1973

When my cat got sick, the operation she needed (which the doctor at the time informed me would save her life) was over $7K. I said go ahead with it, in the end, she died. I could have killed the doctor. :mad:

 

Anyway, I would do it all over if I had to. I would have taken the dog, ugh I'm mad at your friend and I do not even know her.

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Yeah, I can see having a negative feeling towards this. Sounds like an unusual pet owner to be sure.

 

I definitely would not let this friend make end-of-life decisions for me!

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I completely agree with you. I really can't be good friends with someone like that. My favorite old dog survived three types of topical cancer such as that (if her dog's was cancer) Usually they can just do a needle biopsy and send that off. Sometimes if it's the right type of cancer, just piercing it with a needle will make it go away. Her vet may have been trying to overcharge and overdo things.

 

My vet at first didn't suggest a needle biopsy, so I asked her about it and unbelievably, she had to go look it up and from than on, that's what we did. So some vets may try to do everything the expensive way. I was also recommended to do radiation on one of my dog's spots that was a bad type, and I didn't do it more because she was so afraid of the vet and it would have been a lot of visits, and I made the right decision. She never did die of cancer. She lived through all that. Especially with external ones, as long as you catch them early, there's such a good chance of a full recovery.

 

I sympathize. I have a friend who never liked dogs until she saw how much attention one would bring her. She mistreated her dads dogs because she was jealous of them (she's diagnosed narcissistic) and I pleaded with her not to get a dog. She got a chihuahua and next thing I knew its back was broken. She was taking it to A&M to get it treated, and I had no way of knowing what happened (she acted like she didn't know). She doesn't even have a fenced back yard for it, has a yard she doesn't bother to fence, and she let it crap all over the house instead of taking care of it. Then recently she got two high energy herding dog pups and I just washed my hands of her. I mean, she will hate those dogs and they need exercise they will never get and they'll destroy her house and she'll abuse them. I haven't been there in years because I'm afraid of that I'd see. I wish I could just have Animal Services check on her, but she's such a good BSer that it wouldn't do any good. She can charm anyone. I am hoping her adult son is keeping an eye on it, the son she wouldn't let pet puppies or kittens growing up. Ugh.

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You're not being too sensitive. A good pet owner is supposed to look after their pet when it's ill. Obviously there are situations where euthanasia is the best choice, but your friend went ahead with it for no good reason. She's an irresponsible pet owner.

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I agree - irresponsible pet owner for sure. Honestly I would be nearly as pissed about supporting a backyard breeder as I would be about an untimely euthanization.

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I would have a hard time too. I have had my first ever dog for about 6 and a half years now. She is my best friend. I could not imagine having her "put down" for something that could have been nothing.

 

You bring a pet into your life to add to your family. My dog was hit by a truck a few years ago, it cost a LOT to get her back up and running. We had to pay that off for a year at least. And the healing process was rough, we dealt with her pulling her stitches out, having to wear a cone for 6 months, changing wound bandages daily for her and lots of check ups at the vet.

 

I would do it all over again. I have 2 kids too, and I would do as much for my animals as I would for my children. If you aren't ready for the responsibility and potential cost of adding a FAMILY member to your life, don't do it. I don't blame you at all, OP. I take a second look at who a person is when they can be so cavalier about something like this.

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Aww, poor puppy.

 

Listen, you pet lovers have got to ease up. Every life has a value, whether we want to confront that reality or not. A dog before a frog, a person before a dog, a child before a person, etc.

 

The owner of this dog has decided that $500 is worth more than the life of the dog. I'm sure that if I polled you, and asked you each "How much money would you spend before you'd euthanise the dog?", each of you would come up with a different answer.

 

So, really, should whichever of you would bid the highest of my hypothetical question start casting judgment on the rest?

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Aww, poor puppy.

 

Listen, you pet lovers have got to ease up. Every life has a value, whether we want to confront that reality or not. A dog before a frog, a person before a dog, a child before a person, etc.

 

The owner of this dog has decided that $500 is worth more than the life of the dog. I'm sure that if I polled you, and asked you each "How much money would you spend before you'd euthanise the dog?", each of you would come up with a different answer.

 

So, really, should whichever of you would bid the highest of my hypothetical question start casting judgment on the rest?

 

Yeah but...... When one dog's life isn't worth $500, but a "new toy" aka the new puppy is worth a $2,000 investment I take issue.

 

I don't think I would go into any sort of significant debt to save an animal's life. I made a hard choice to euthanize a horse because I didn't want to spend the money for a surgery - but I didn't run out and buy a new horse for 4x as much.

 

While I am all for having limits, but pets shouldn't be treated like disposal objects.

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Yeah but...... When one dog's life isn't worth $500, but a "new toy" aka the new puppy is worth a $2,000 investment I take issue.

 

I don't think I would go into any sort of significant debt to save an animal's life. I made a hard choice to euthanize a horse because I didn't want to spend the money for a surgery - but I didn't run out and buy a new horse for 4x as much.

 

While I am all for having limits, but pets shouldn't be treated like disposal objects.

OK, so that's you, but even if I limited the hypothetical to "vs. how much it would cost to replace the pet" you might end up on the "cheap" end of the spectrum.

 

The question remains. If you have a less expensive threshold than the next person, are you worthy of disdain? Is that where we draw the line?

 

I'm not saying it's right or wrong, OP can do whatever she wants. I'm just wondering if it's right to judge.

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todreaminblue

i would have got the treatment done but this woman isnt me.You said the dog was a happy little dog.....so obviously she looked after her dog..i dont know what the vet said to her or what she thought or what her thought processes were in having her animal put to sleep and honestly neither do you to make rash judgments on her character....or on her postion to put out for expensive vet treatments.....i would take it as ...it was her responsibility to decide......any animal put to sleep is sad, sick or healthy its still sad......if she forked out 2 grand for another(which you dont know either) chances are what the vet told her was not good...i spent three thousand dollars on my rottweiler at the vets one time...she was old and sick.and suffering.and guess what happened she ended up being put to sleep and if the vet had rung me and not my mother i woudl have begged and begged for him to fix her....you really dont know what was said..either ask her...or hold your judgements to yourself and realize this was her dog and not yours....she did what she thought was best for the dog and maybe for her herself and her family.....even though it is sad.....deb

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OK, so that's you, but even if I limited the hypothetical to "vs. how much it would cost to replace the pet" you might end up on the "cheap" end of the spectrum.

 

The question remains. If you have a less expensive threshold than the next person, are you worthy of disdain? Is that where we draw the line?

 

I'm not saying it's right or wrong, OP can do whatever she wants. I'm just wondering if it's right to judge.

 

Yes, it is. I'm sorry, I judge people who treat their pets like they are accessories.

 

If you aren't willing to put your own dog's medical needs before your vacation to Mexico, you shouldn't even have a dog. And then just replacing it wth a fresh model? Gross. OP, I completely understand you, I wouldn't want to be friends with someone like that either.

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Eternal Sunshine

Honestly, for my cat, I would go into as much debt as it is possible for me to save his life. I am talking selling my house, borrowing up to the limits of what I would have been given by any financial institution .

 

I realize that I am probably crazy but what this woman did would make me beyond disgusted :sick::sick::sick::sick:

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It sounds to me that you are not getting all the facts about the diagnoses...

It might be the vet said it was terminal and in order to start chemo they would have to do the test first.

 

The lady sounds like she is a pet lover and we have all had to make those tough decisions..

 

Maybe she just isn't telling you all the info...

 

The new dog is a replacement.. she obviously needs a dog in her life as many of us do so she went out and got a new one.

 

IMO, if she just got rid of the problem, yes that would be something terrible but it sounds like she just didn't tell you what was going on with the dog.. if that is true then you are judging her for something we all have had to go thru.. if it isn't true then you are right to get rid of the friendship.

 

How right are you about all the facts of the dogs health ?

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Aww, poor puppy.

 

Listen, you pet lovers have got to ease up. Every life has a value, whether we want to confront that reality or not. A dog before a frog, a person before a dog, a child before a person, etc.

 

The owner of this dog has decided that $500 is worth more than the life of the dog. I'm sure that if I polled you, and asked you each "How much money would you spend before you'd euthanise the dog?", each of you would come up with a different answer.

 

So, really, should whichever of you would bid the highest of my hypothetical question start casting judgment on the rest?

 

This actually makes alot of sense and I also think as others said the OP didn't get the entire story she didn't even get the story from her friend she had to hear it threw the "grape vine" we all know how that old game telephone went..stories change as they pass from person to person.. another thing to consider is she prob paid more then 500 for the new dog if its a purebred even at a back yard breeder they usually dont sell them that cheap I think there was more to it ive never herd of any reputable vet just killing a dog cause the owner didn't want it anymore surely that's not what really happened..OP I think you should apoligise to your friend and try asking her what really happened..

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I did not hear about the dog's health issues through the grapevines. My friend told me several times about her dog health issues and I have seen myself her dog several times after she got that bump on her head. I have learn through my daughter she had euthanized her dog -- my daughter called me and said: mom don't go on FB because F euthanized her dog and I know that will get you upset. I speak to that friend on daily basis, even the day she euthanized her dog she didn't speak a word of it to me because she knew my position on the matter.

 

I fully understand that $500 may be a lot to a lot of people but my friend isn't tight on money, she is management for a bank, she travels several times a year, $500 is pocket money to her.

 

My friend told me herself she did not want to know if it was cancer or not, she just wanted to put her down. The dog wasn't suffering, she was energetic and happy. There is no mystery to it.

 

Anyway, she got the new pup and now she's calling me to get advice. How ironic.

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I agree that there seems to be a lot of second hand information floating around and if you consider this person a real friend then before you go judging her everywhere maybe at least have a conversation with her about it and get the reasoning behind getting the dog put down right from the source. Or maybe you don't really see her as a friend but as someone you enjoy judging and feeling morally superior over?

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