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Was I right to be mad at my friend? (Long sorry)


Andrew85

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My (now former) close female friend of 2.5 years randomly made rude remarks about my sisters appearance a few months back. All though I think she was just giving me her opinion and not deliberately trying to be harsh I still found it very rude. She said my sister was not that pretty, not ugly ugly but not pretty or beautiful. She also went on to describe the shape of her head as being really round. Afterwards I think I realised why she gave me that opinion. Someone else we know had told me she thought my sister was pretty and she obviously disagreed and thought she had to tell me. She has a habit of insulting other girls looks a lot so I think it's an insecure thing too.

 

I let it pass and we went home shortly after. That evening I told another friend about her comments, and my friend found it really rude and told me to tell her to not be so opinionated to your face, otherwise she will think it's ok and get worse. This coinciding with other recent comments she made about my life made me think I should tell her.

 

Here is where it all kicked off. I texted my friend to say "hope you had a good day :) .. blah blah... can I just say when you gave me your opinion on my sisters appearance today could you not say it to my face next time? I don't think it's good to get that personal thanks :-)". I then sent a picture we had taken together to change the subject and expected her to be ok with me.

 

She immediately responded with "looool why didn't you say this to my face? I haven't done anything wrong mate.. I just don't think something is pretty".

 

I was calm and said I thought it was not nice to say and to keep it to herself and others. You're entitled to your opinion but can you respect me? She said "why didn't you say this to my face?".

I said I had thought about it after we saw each other and she said well she's entitled to say what she wants about my sister.

 

I got a bit mad with her and called her selfish, immature and spoilt. I then said "how have you been raised to think that is socially acceptable?" And she claimed I had insulted her and her family terribly by my comments. She then got her boyfriend involved who defended her comments and insulted me. I said that she comes across insecure when she insults other girls appearances all the time and she shouldn't. They both said there is nothing to be jealous about, about you or your sister.

I blocked her and let her have the last say.

 

2 days later at work she confronts me going mad calling me a coward for not saying it to her face and calling me a horrible person. I walked away without saying a word.

 

2 months later she tries to get my attention on Instagram, I messaged her asking why and she started going mad yet again and the first thing she said was "oh btw I'm not jealous of you or your sister there is nothing to be jealous about". But this makes me think she is?

 

She then insults me several times calling me a loser and that she doesn't think about me, that I am nothing but the enemy to her and hates me with a passion.

 

At work all I get now are hilarious looks of contempt toward me. Sometimes I find it hard not to laugh. She has also slandered me to several people and shown them our argument as well as approaching one female she thought I fancied and tried to put them off me. The people that know are all baffled by her reaction to me.

 

What do you think? Sorry it was long. :-)

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You should laugh. And if she pulls anything at work, bust her on it loudly but with a big smile on her face while you loudly repeat back what she said, "Did you just say I'm a coward?" something like that. She has self-esteem issues probably. They get a little boner each time they tear someone down, but take comfort because it is fleeting. They have a hole inside that can't be filled without a lot of work on themselves.

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