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How often are you willing to drive your friends around?


emerald86

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I'm curious to see what people have to say about this. I live in the same city as many of my friends and we all live pretty close to each other. Generally when we decide to hangout, there are times when they offer to drive, and there are times when I offer to drive. It's all 50-50, and we've never had any problems with who takes turns driving. Occasionally, there may be 1 or 2 people who always offer to drive everyone everywhere, and in this case, one of us will step up and say that we'll drive the next time, or pay for gas/parking.

 

I have one friend though who just recently started driving about 8-9 months ago. And whenever we hangout, it's pretty much the expectation that I'm the one driving. I didn't have a problem with this at first, but we go out pretty often, and many of these places aren't anywhere close to where we live. I'm still not too bothered by being the one driving--after all, she doesn't live too far from me. But I find it strange that she never offers to drive. She usually just says, "so what time will you pick me up?" I think maybe it's because she's a new driver, and she may be nervous driving, but when I think back to personal experience, I was mostly comfortable with driving after doing it for everyday for 9 months.

 

How about you? Do you drive your friends around, and if so, how much of it are you okay with doing?

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uh, is she interested in you? saying, "what time are you picking me up" sounds like, to me, she's making a "date"??

 

anyway, we don't know if it's fair, or if it's just a lack of driving experience on her part but that is how i'd play it.

 

just say, "no, i'm not picking you up, you are picking me up, you need the experience".

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could you try to beat her to the punch sometime and say "could you pick me up" - if you feel bad doing that could you sort of make it sound like you can't drive like your car is in the shop or some other reason you can't drive your car. I am not an advocate for being dishonest but occasionally it is justified if it will help someone see something they may not realize :)

 

As for myself - i find myself driving people often but i don't mind it. It is usually because i am the DD since I don't drink as much/can't handle a lot of alcohol so it makes most sense. But i do have a friend who seems to never drive especially because we go on a lot of road trips where it would be nice to offer to switch or even offer to drive once in a while. I think it has to do with her comfort level of driving though similar to your friend you described.

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I tend to generally prefer not to drive. I just have trouble being social while driving, hard for me to focus so it makes me a bit nervous. Also, often in my circles, the person with biggest or nicest or cleanest car usually ends up the default always driver just cause we all like the leg room and all. So I do offer, yet I also explain I rather not, but am completely ok if they don't want to. I also always either offer gas money, but since that often gets refused, I end up insisting on paying for their meal on occasion or such. I certainly would have no issue if someone said they are sick of driving or such, and I would gladly drive so they feel things are fair.

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