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Friend signed up for sports after school. Now I'll never see her.


Area57

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TL;DR

New friend of three months that hung out five times a week signed up for after school six days a week basketball so I won't see her anymore really ever. I'm hurt. She didn't ask what I thought first. Am I justified to feel hurt or am I making a big deal out of nothing. How do I let her know I'm hurt? I wrote "too bad I won't see you" she wrote back "I know :("

 

Hi. I haven't had one close friend in a while. About three months ago I met a new reined and we have been hanging out together 5 times a week. We joined a gym and I'll often pick her up and we will go there and then do their stuff. Or we just do whatever whether we go to the gym or not.

 

She had been talking about signing up for swimming after school and then found out it was for an hour five days a week. I told her we wouldn't ever see each other. She didn't sign up. She said they had basketball instead and that it was three days a week and would try that. So I took her to get a physical this weekend and last night after basketball she writes me.

 

She writes that basketball is two hours and it is SIX days a week instead of three. I wrote back late last night "too bad, I'm not going to see you much anymore". She wrote back ":( I know. But thanksgiving is soon "

 

How should I feel about this? Is it ok to be hurt and offended? I liked our routine. I know she liked going places with me too because she was the one that most of the time asked. So I wasn't pushy. SHE would write me in the morning

 

"Hey, are you picking me up today?" or ask if I want to hike on the weekend or whatever.

 

So I'm thinking she just isn't the kind of person that thinks about how other people feel that much and maybe she isn't very "deep" and I really don't know her that well because it hasn't been very long.

 

Is it likely that I thought we were becoming close but she was just doing stuff with me but wasn't forming this great bond?

 

How do I feel and how do I react? I am hurt because I liked seeing her and now I really won't almost ever. Not only did the time change and all our warm weather fun is done. But now she gets done with her day at 6 at night instead of 3:30. At 3:30 we still had time to do stuff. Not at six. Why would she want her entire day and almost her entire life taken up by school stuff? And one day on the weekend too?

 

How do you go from hanging out with someone most days to not at all. And for basketball. She barely even plays basketball. It's not like it's her favorite sport.

 

Mostly I just don't know how to react. And want to know if j am being petty by feeling hurt or if that is normal. This sucks.

Edited by Area57
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GorillaTheater

Dude, you're 35. This strikes me as extraordinarily needy.

 

 

She's a young person doing normal young person stuff. Be glad for her and maybe find useful ways to occupy your time without being so dependent on her.

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I don't know. Don't be embarrassed about it but don't overthink it either. I don't see where it shows your age, but whatever. It sounds to me like she is just young and trying out a lot of stuff. I doubt she even thought about you when she signed up. Sorry to say. But probably true. Don't worry about it.

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