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Did I sound crazy or something?


JoeyPotter86

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JoeyPotter86

I texted my friend who usually comes into the gym where I work on Tuesdays

 

"John are you coming tomorrow? Things happened to me this weekend & im scared. I don't feel safe telling anyone else but I know I should tell someone & I really value your advice"

 

He knows I've been having trouble with my dad & has helped me before but its been 5 hrs and he hasn't responded BUT he's been active on Facebook & he started following someone on Instagram 30 min ago. The last time I saw him he was being like an annoying little brother & He asked me why I'm so cranky but I just received bad news and didn't want to tell him so I just told him to "leave me alone" could that be the reason? Of course now I realize if he does come tomorrow I didn't really need to send the text but what happened over the weekend was really bothering me & I wasn't thinking clearly & I guess needed to reach out. I don't know why he'd ignore though

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JoeyPotter86

Oh and he knows about my ex who used to abuse me. In fact before him & I dated he had told me to dump him so yea he knows a lot of personal things about me

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ChickiePops

I mean..it seems like a lot to dump on someone..and that's a whole lot of mood swings. I'd say back off for a good long time.

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JoeyPotter86

I didn't tell him this all at once. This was over the course of 3 years. Almost all our interactions are fun & flirty & we laugh a ton but nevermind I guess he wants nothing to do with me now

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>>The last time I saw him he was being like an annoying little brother & He asked me why I'm so cranky but I just received bad news and didn't want to tell him so I just told him to "leave me alone" could that be the reason? <<

 

Sure it could be the reason. He may well have taken it to heart and is now very much leaving you alone.

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From what you've said, I don't think he's that into having you lean on him about stuff and doesn't want to encourage it.

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JoeyPotter86

Ok so he texted this morning at 8:00am "Oh **** my bad I don't check my messages after work helps me relax lol....I don't know about tonight may be tomorrow but we can always talk on the phone" Does that sound sincere? I Know I used the excuse of "sorry passed out" before just because I wasn't ready to answer someone's text but "I don't check my messages after work?" That sounds like a lie but such a bad one that it might be true? I don't know I'm thinking of just not texting back. Thoughts?

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Ok so he texted this morning at 8:00am "Oh **** my bad I don't check my messages after work helps me relax lol....I don't know about tonight may be tomorrow but we can always talk on the phone" Does that sound sincere? I Know I used the excuse of "sorry passed out" before just because I wasn't ready to answer someone's text but "I don't check my messages after work?" That sounds like a lie but such a bad one that it might be true? I don't know I'm thinking of just not texting back. Thoughts?

He's offering to talk to you on the phone or see you tomorrow maybe, that sounds pretty sincere and genuine to me. Who cares why or how long it takes people to text- life was so much more simple before we had to worry about text etiquite!!

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JoeyPotter86

Mrs rubble, I agree 100%! I hate this texting thing! And thank you thats what I thought too, I just responded "Nah it can wait. Sorry bout that was really upset. Lot goin on" I figured give him his space and night and then when I see him we can talk. Thanks so much!

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Ok so he texted this morning at 8:00am "Oh **** my bad I don't check my messages after work helps me relax lol....I don't know about tonight may be tomorrow but we can always talk on the phone" Does that sound sincere? I Know I used the excuse of "sorry passed out" before just because I wasn't ready to answer someone's text but "I don't check my messages after work?" That sounds like a lie but such a bad one that it might be true? I don't know I'm thinking of just not texting back. Thoughts?

 

I can easily go for an evening and not think to check my phone. Or emails. And I've got friends who reply the next day when they've just seen my text. Sounds totally normal to me.

 

The more alarming thing to me is that you're analysing texts from a mate. Do you do this with your other friends too?

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JoeyPotter86

basil67 Thank you for your input that makes me feel better knowing that its normal and others do it. But you're right, he's not just a mate, we dated for a short while but I wasnt ready for a relationship so we ended it but decided to stay friends. I still care about him a lot & would like to rekindle things if the timing is right, thats why Im analyzing his texts lol

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JoeyPotter86

preraph, that occurred to me too which is another reason why I backed off, . I was confused as to what the hell he meant lol so I figured to just play it safe and respect his space

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There are lots of mixed signals here. He is treating you like a sister, which is definitely in the friend zone category. You are sending the wrong message by telling him to leave you alone when the chips are down. I'm not judging, just saying if you have feelings for him and want to rekindle the relationship, pushing him away isn't the way to go about it. Shocking news and events in our lives contribute to haywire decisions and knee-jerk reactions. Sounds like a heart to heart is in order. Good luck! I hope things are better.

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JoeyPotter86

Methodical thank you for your input. Did I really push him away? I mean I came to him but since it didn't seem like a good time for him I backed off. plus he's giving me mixed signals too. It just seemed itd be too forced so I figured I'd wait til he comes in. which he always does. Usually 2-3 times a week

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