FaKe Friends!

[love1336x]

I feel frustrated yet conflicted. To make a long story short, my supervisor and I got into a conflict which ended in a lawsuit. I felt my friends who work with me completely and utterly sided with our supervisor. Oh course I felt my friends should be on my side, but on the other hand, I guess it was fear of losing their jobs, however, she’s not that powerful position where whatever she says, people get fired. I work in a supermarket.

I guess if I were in their position I would be on their side. I would make them feel it’s okay. My boss brought the suit to me. I’ve been there for them, and they have told me really deep dark personal secrets. So, I know we’re “friends”, but after this whole thing. Ehh.

One of my friends don’t even bother to say hello to me if my supervisor is inside the building. It’s like how immature is that? Another stupid event, where a close friend of the supervisor was basically yelling out how she was going out with my friends to the bar to have a good time with the supervisor, for winning the lawsuit. Later that day I am bothering my friend saying, “OOO you’re going out to have fun with my enemy?!” She acted completely dumb and said that Lee (the woman who was yelling) was lying. A couple hours later…. Lee was posting pictures with my friend on fb.

To me, I want to completely cut them off, and move on with my life. Too harsh? I sort of want to talk to them about this, but at the same time, eh what’s the point? It’s clear they have picked my supervisor side over mine and now I’m no longer their friend. I never saw this coming personally. :/

[basil67]

Could it be that they are on the supervisor's side because they think she's right? Their choice to support her may be due to ethics. If this is the case, they don't owe you support if they think you're in the wrong.

 

Have they given their opinion on the lawsuit?

[love1336x]

Basically at the time when it was happening, to give up, don't even bother fighting someone who knows so much about the law. I don't believe they thought I was wrong morally, but I guess being young they felt like I didn't have a standing chance and why even bother to make a case.

[preraph]

It's called survival in the workplace. Never expect anyone to stand by you when it's you against the workplace! It's their livelihood, and you are just a work friend. They don't want to be seen with you at all.

[LydiaLong]

I concur with Basil that it's possible they feel you were wrong. It might help to know what the issue was/is.

[love1336x]

It's called survival in the workplace. Never expect anyone to stand by you when it's you against the workplace! It's their livelihood, and you are just a work friend. They don't want to be seen with you at all.

 

I thought I was a friend outside of work, but you're right. It would seem I am nothing more than a work friend. They care about there livelihood. Basically put the scarlet letter on me!! ugh!!

[love1336x]

I concur with Basil that it's possible they feel you were wrong. It might help to know what the issue was/is.

 

eh i don't think that, it wasn't a serious issue at all.

I think it more of what preraph said. I was nothing more than a work friend, now the supervisor hate me, and they simply don't want to be associate with me.

[Emilia]

I never take work friendship seriously, lessons learned years ago.

[preraph]

I thought I was a friend outside of work, but you're right. It would seem I am nothing more than a work friend. They care about there livelihood. Basically put the scarlet letter on me!! ugh!!

 

If you end up leaving, one or two might try to be friends, or not. I had people (business associates who sold to me) who were fake friends to me and once I was no longer working there, some of them were kind of nasty. I have never been fake like that with people to that point. I mean if I was going to be fake but not really like them and they moved on, I'd probably think enough of my own reputation not to show my colors by then being a jerk.

 

But with the workmates, literally, there is too much at stake for them to associate with you more than necessary when your job is in danger, and you shouldn't hold that against them. It's just a lesson to take with you. Good luck.

[love1336x]

I never take work friendship seriously, lessons learned years ago.

 

Truth. I dunno? You spend so many week days, and weekends with people you think you know them. I only did ever hang out with them once out of my job because they're busy people. But I don't wanna dish there secrets... but they have told me really deep and personal stuff, and I don't think they made up the stuff they said to me. But as you said lesson learned...

[love1336x]

If you end up leaving, one or two might try to be friends, or not. I had people (business associates who sold to me) who were fake friends to me and once I was no longer working there, some of them were kind of nasty. I have never been fake like that with people to that point. I mean if I was going to be fake but not really like them and they moved on, I'd probably think enough of my own reputation not to show my colors by then being a jerk.

 

But with the workmates, literally, there is too much at stake for them to associate with you more than necessary when your job is in danger, and you shouldn't hold that against them. It's just a lesson to take with you. Good luck.

 

That's the thing though, this supervisor does not have the power to fire people, let alone write them up. A woman who work in my department who was always, late, always calling out, always not doing her work for years stay in the department and my supervisor she wanting so badly to get her out, but people above her wouldn't let this girl go.

 

So to me that tells me she doesn't hold much power.

 

But whateva, not my lost. I am good friend. If they can't see that oh well.