Kaiten Posted January 18, 2016 Share Posted January 18, 2016 My friend Anita's boyfriend one day up and left her after 2 years of a rock-as-hell relationship. I actually know the bf, and saw them break up twice in a 4 month period. When Anita's bf left suddenly, she had nothing but bad things to say, and we spent several long hours talking about it. The bf hadn't had a job in 2 years, and never helped her with anything other than dog-walking according to her. They never even went anywhere together. Everyone in Anita's circle agreed that him leaving was for the best. Now, 6 months later, she suddenly tells me, "I bought a plane ticket for Howard to come back. We're getting back together and the ticket's already bought." It's so hard to watch. And it makes me not want to date. Sorry, just venting. Can anyone relate? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 19, 2016 Share Posted January 19, 2016 Of course, I think we can all relate. We all have some friend who has someone treating them badly who isn't bright enough to get out of that relationship and stay out. I've even had friends I only heard from when they were fighting with their bf and then disappeared the rest of the time until the breakup. It's asinine. I think you're within your rights to tell her, Well, I don't want to hear about it anymore, then, because it's like standing here waiting for a bus to run over you. And you can say, I never heard you say anything really good about the guy, so not sure why you're wanting to get back together, but it's your business. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
deckard11 Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 I ended my friendship with my best friend of almost 20 years because he ended up marrying a woman he had broken up with twice already. They weren't even together a whole year. Stupid people. I'm way better off now without him and others in my life now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sexylovinghim Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 My friend Anita's boyfriend one day up and left her after 2 years of a rock-as-hell relationship. I actually know the bf, and saw them break up twice in a 4 month period. When Anita's bf left suddenly, she had nothing but bad things to say, and we spent several long hours talking about it. The bf hadn't had a job in 2 years, and never helped her with anything other than dog-walking according to her. They never even went anywhere together. Everyone in Anita's circle agreed that him leaving was for the best. Now, 6 months later, she suddenly tells me, "I bought a plane ticket for Howard to come back. We're getting back together and the ticket's already bought." It's so hard to watch. And it makes me not want to date. Sorry, just venting. Can anyone relate? That is the worst situation EVER. I mean EVER. I had an "associate" ( I don't call people my friends) who got back with her man after he slept with her cousin. I'm all about giving my opinion when it comes to other people's relationship, when they ask. She asked me for my advice many times, and I made sure that I told her that she needed to move on and stay away from him like the plague. Well, guess what? She got back with him. I hated seeing her do that to herself, but at the end of the day it's not my life, or my relationship, and I told her that. I also told her, she better not come talking to me about what he does because I don't want to be apart of it. We are still cool. no need to break off association, I just know how to deal with her. Link to post Share on other sites
Wewon Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 It's so hard to watch. And it makes me not want to date. Sorry, just venting. Can anyone relate? Sure, its like the friend that is constantly complaining about their weight and then orders a pizza. The problem is, people do what they want, but it is self centered for them to constantly put others in the emotionally draining position to both have to be supportive and then sit back and watch them contradict themselves. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 When people get dumped, they have a tendency to bad-mouth the ex, rail on about their innumerable flaws (real and imagined), and paint the person as the devil incarnate with all sorts of personality disorders...to anyone who might listen. It's part of letting go. (It's the flip side of what happens at the start of the relationship when the person walks on water and is the best thing since sliced bread.) Recognize what's happening, be sympathetic, but stay relatively uninvested during the ranting phase that follows post-breakup. Then you won't feel so emotionally torn, drained, upset when your friend reunites with Captain Wonderful for a time, before repeating the cycle all over again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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