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I have no close friends/best friends. Am i normal?


newlywedder

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I don't have any really close friendships or even a best friend. I do have a sister that I am close with and a husband. I just feel like I don't need many close friends to be happy. A part of me thinks that is wrong and that I need to be more social and meet more people.

 

The problem is that I am a huge introvert to the core and find meeting others exhausting and difficult. I feel stressed and my heart beats very fast if I am in a room with lots of people who are talking together. I also bet I come across to people as "off" and do not seem interesting.

 

I would love to have some close friends to do activities with from time to time but sadly, I do not. My sister only wants to do something with me if a friend cancels on her like the she did last Saturday. I feel like a loser and am envious of those who can meet friends so easily and develop long-lasting and deep, meaningful friendships with others.

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"normal" is such a loaded word. If your situation suits you & you are happy with your choices, you are fine. If you find yourself wanting more friends set out to make some.

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I think its the normal if it works for you. Marriage and work will also dictate "close" friends. My real close friends are still out their but now there is my marriage and friends I work with. What is your passion? find that and you might find close friends. If you like to dance take classes ect. Also when you have a child you will meet many new moms eventually, there will be opportunities. Go out more and eventually your heart won't beat so much and you will get more comfortable with people.

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  • 1 month later...

I used to have about 5 super-close friends and a bunch of acqauntinaces. I've lost contact completely with 3 out of the five now and the other two we message each other from time to time to check in, but don't really chat or hang out.

 

I probably have two friends that I see now and again but the only people I can really rely on to do things with are my two sisters. My work colleagues are pretty cool but we don't hang out much outside of work.

 

So you're not alone.

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If pressed, I would say it is not normal to only have a husband and a sister, but I also realize these are friends to you. As someone in her older years, I would just say that the more good friends you make, the less alone you'll feel when everyone starts dying off. You said nothing about kids, but I will predict that if you have kids, there won't even be time for friends unless they are other mothers and you're basically able to lean on one another for childcare, but that may be an opening for you to bond with someone, though the couple of mothers I know say those aren't her "real" friends, more like they're dependent on each other with not so much in common except for kids, but a person could get lucky and meet someone who they did like on multiple levels.

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That makes two of us.

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I find that there is a difference between wanting friends because of society's so-called expectations, and wanting friends because you genuinely want them. I used to seek out large social circles because I thought that having a ton of friends made me look "cool." In reality, I'm also an introvert to the core, and I'm really much better off having just a few close friends. I'm happier, and my life is simpler that way.

 

Think about what makes you happy, instead of what is considered "normal." Do you want a few close friends because it would make you happy? I do understand this, because humans in general are social beings. If so, find local groups in your area. You are likely to meet similar-minded people that way.

 

Some people just don't need a whole lot of friends to be happy, and that is perfectly okay.

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Well introvert doesnt mean a loner with no friends.

 

So i think some things we all have to learn and work on.

 

Maybe you dont want close friends, but its good to have at least freinds.

People you can socialize with at least.

You cant be 24/7 on your husband. Some times both need a little space and

fun.

 

So as introvert you can also choose a club of your interest and get there so you get to do something and socialize at the same time.

Like art club, charity organization, craft club, etc. what you like to do.:bunny::cool:

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So as introvert you can also choose a club of your interest and get there so you get to do something and socialize at the same time.

Like art club, charity organization, craft club, etc. what you like to do.:bunny::cool:

 

this way the pressure to socialize is less and it may go more natural cause you doing something you like so conversation will start soon or later lol.:D

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