Mizz Layta Posted May 13, 2015 Share Posted May 13, 2015 How can you tell if someone doesnt like you and just pretends too and is just being polite but really doesnt vs. someone that does truly like you..... For me I find they don't say hi or initiate a convo? What are other signs? Link to post Share on other sites
StalwartMind Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 You won't find any definitive answer to that question. Even the people that seem the most easy to read can have deeper layers of personality no one will ever know, and as such deceptiveness and the likes can never fully be guarded or deciphered. At best you will have to trust your own judgement and if possible confront someone if you are brave and assume they may be misleading you. This is why I love people that are brutally honest and just say what they think, even if it may offend most. Good thing I'm not one to be easily offended I guess. There's just too many different character types regardless of what similarities we all may share. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Taramere Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 Unless you're aware of something you did that affected them in a way that would piss off any reasonable person, I think it's best to just not really give it much thought. Particularly if they're at least putting the effort to be civil in their dealings with you. Some people just take time to feel comfortable around new people. Then there might be people who dislike you because you don't get along with one of their friends. Or they might dislike you for factors totally out of your control (if they have a prejudice for instance). If you're getting an instinct that they just aren't comfortable around you, I think it's best to keep your responses to them civil and muted - and generally limit your interactions with them. If your gut tells you somebody doesn't like you, then watch your back a bit around them but don't get too caught up in thinking about it. Confronting them with your sense that they don't really like you isn't likely to achieve anything other than to create an embarrassing situation. People can't necessarily do anything about their feelings, and as long as the person's being civil then that's all you can really ask of them. If the dislike is translating into unacceptable behaviour, then that's something different obviously....and you might have to do something about it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
minime13 Posted May 15, 2015 Share Posted May 15, 2015 How can you tell if someone doesnt like you and just pretends too and is just being polite but really doesnt vs. someone that does truly like you..... For me I find they don't say hi or initiate a convo? What are other signs? I think, generally speaking, the best indicator is communication - or lack thereof. If you always say hi first and initiate conversation, and the other person simply answers your conversation with as few words as possible, then they probably don't really like you. Like, if you ask how their weekend was, and they respond 'fine' without asking you about yours - they are just being polite. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loverboy69 Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 How can you tell if someone doesnt like you and just pretends too and is just being polite but really doesnt vs. someone that does truly like you..... For me I find they don't say hi or initiate a convo? What are other signs? There are a million ways to answer this. I've been accused by many for years of being stuck up or unapproachable. I'm the nicest most generous guy you'd meet if you were in my circle. But being more of an introvert it's true that I don't go out of my way to say hello to everyone and some take that as me not liking them (especially co-workers). I've even heard people say that I "hate them," when in reality I'm totally indifferent towards them. They think I hate them because I'm not social with them yet see me talking to other people. Not to confuse you but in a nutshell don't mistake someone's indifference for not liking you especially if that person is just like me. I'll be everyone's best friend but they usually have to approach me first. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted May 16, 2015 Share Posted May 16, 2015 If in southern California, check to see what they said behind your back while being nice to you. If in New York, open your eyes and ears because they're going to tell you to your face... and they'll probably be yelling. Link to post Share on other sites
sportygirl89 Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 A few examples that might help you. The ex best friend who left me when I was sick (she's super bipolar and other mental issues) just completely stopped talking to me altogether. No problem with that since I've had less drama since she departed from me. I had another friend where the fiance was controlling and no response from here it was via the male fiance. I had been friends with this girl since we were little. Another girl I met at a gym and we were lifting partners. We started hanging out outside of lifting. After awhile I got the vibe she wasn't wanting to hang out anymore. She would say oh she doesn't have the cash, or she doesn't want to become adjusted to the town, and even did get an "I didn't want to hang out (only part time friend thing)." There is a girl in my program who gave the excuse she was focusing on program and family this past semester (yet she was always hanging out with other girls in the program). I was extremely close to her the semester before. Her click adopted some other girl in the program that took my place. So I'm just doing what I need to do get through program. Ultimately I've learned that people are selfish. Nothing really you can do if people don't like you. If you've had a gut feeling about someone or a situation you're probably right. It's better to drop certain people so you don't have so much stress in your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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