Jump to content

What do you think of people who look through your phone?


disneyfan90

Recommended Posts

disneyfan90

One of my guy friends has been liking me for more than 4 years now. He asked me out many times and every single time has told me that he's always had very, very strong feelings for me. But I rejected him every time, because I never wanted to go out with him. He always insists that some day, my feelings for him would change, but I've always been firm about it--I have no feelings for him, never will, and I can't possibly imagine going out with him. I'm actually really averse to the idea, as mean as that sounds.

 

So I made it clear that I'm not interested in him and never will be, and he said that's fine. But he never stops interrogating me about my love life. Every time he sees me, one of the first things he asks me is, "So, any new guys in your life?" If I am dating anyone, I do tell him, but he gets completely worked up. He asks me nonstop questions about the guy, and when I say something like, "We're not dating anymore," he says, "Oh thank goodness."

 

I can deal with all of that, but there is one thing that really annoys me. Whenever there's a guy in my life that I'm serious about, this guy (the one mentioned above) grabs my phone and reads through all my texting conversations with the guy I'm dating. I ask him many times to give me my phone back, and sometimes even demand it, but he does not give it back. I then reach in to grab my phone myself, but he still does not give it back. Pretty soon, we are playing tug of war with my phone. One time, my best friend stepped in and yelled at this guy to give me my phone back. I was eternally grateful for her.

 

Would you be annoyed if this happened to you? I personally think he has no business trying to find out about my love life through my phone--that stuff can be personal, and really, I think it's nobody else's business except for the 2 people who are dating. What do you think?

Edited by disneyfan90
Link to post
Share on other sites

Your case here seems to be that of an obsession, you can only imagine what happens with you get in a relationship with him.

 

Now i will process to tell you about my experience but before that i will state that in no circumstance is it cool.

 

My now Ex, she used to lock her phone, i never did lock my phone. She would always jump on my phone looking through my logs, texts. Sometimes she will claims she just wants to look at my pictures (I don't take pics). From pics she goes to text, calls, emails. I never touched her phone. Need less to say she was having an affair.

 

They do this because of their insecurity and projection. Before the affair she had that ran for 8 months, she probably (definitely) had guys texting and calling that's why she was invading my phone trying to see if i was doing the same. You know the saying "its the cheater who always accuse the other of cheating"

Link to post
Share on other sites

Gosh, you need to learn to set some boundaries. You're just letting him do all this and keep tabs on you. You need to run him off because no guy you do date will put up with him. He will stop you from having a bf. Why would you LET him even hold your phone? It's none of his business. You need to TELL him "It's none of your business" anytime he grabs your phone or asks you about your dating life! He is obsessed, and you need to cut him off and block him every way possible.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

OP, you've created your own problem. He grabs your phone and goes thru it because you allow him to. He keeps asking you questions about relationships because you keep answering. Forget all the psychobabble about boundaries. Tell him to keep his hands off your property and tell him yoour relationships are none of his business. Otherwise put up with his BS. The choice is yours. It makes no difference if we would be annoyed - that question is silly.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

That's not your friend, that's some guy who's waiting to rub his dingy on you- and he's becoming impatient.

 

You should (not anymore) have a warrant to go through my phone, otherwise it's going to fracture whatever relationship we have, friendships included. It'd be wise to keep your distance, and post on social media that if anything happens to you that it was probably this guy.

Link to post
Share on other sites
whichwayisup
One of my guy friends has been liking me for more than 4 years now. He asked me out many times and every single time has told me that he's always had very, very strong feelings for me. But I rejected him every time, because I never wanted to go out with him. He always insists that some day, my feelings for him would change, but I've always been firm about it--I have no feelings for him, never will, and I can't possibly imagine going out with him. I'm actually really averse to the idea, as mean as that sounds.

 

So I made it clear that I'm not interested in him and never will be, and he said that's fine. But he never stops interrogating me about my love life. Every time he sees me, one of the first things he asks me is, "So, any new guys in your life?" If I am dating anyone, I do tell him, but he gets completely worked up. He asks me nonstop questions about the guy, and when I say something like, "We're not dating anymore," he says, "Oh thank goodness."

 

I can deal with all of that, but there is one thing that really annoys me. Whenever there's a guy in my life that I'm serious about, this guy (the one mentioned above) grabs my phone and reads through all my texting conversations with the guy I'm dating. I ask him many times to give me my phone back, and sometimes even demand it, but he does not give it back. I then reach in to grab my phone myself, but he still does not give it back. Pretty soon, we are playing tug of war with my phone. One time, my best friend stepped in and yelled at this guy to give me my phone back. I was eternally grateful for her.

 

Would you be annoyed if this happened to you? I personally think he has no business trying to find out about my love life through my phone--that stuff can be personal, and really, I think it's nobody else's business except for the 2 people who are dating. What do you think?

 

Stop hanging out with him. He is NOT your friend, he "likes" you and is jealous/nosy and bossy. This is not a healthy friendship for you, he is rude, disrespectful and asks too many questions (not out of concern but to cause issues for you!) and to be blunt, he's an immature jerk. Why are you friends with him?

 

Tell him if he ever touches your phone and invades your privacy one more time, the friendship is over. Tell him to respect the boundaries and not be such a pain in the a.ss and if he can't handle it, then it's best to not hang out anymore. Really, he needs to grow up.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...