LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Platonic > Friendship

My friend talks about killing a lot


Friendship Having issues with a friend? Get it off your chest!

Like Tree19Likes
  • 2 Post By TigerLilly78
  • 3 Post By almond
  • 2 Post By KatZee
  • 2 Post By elaine567
  • 2 Post By d0nnivain
  • 2 Post By Rainbowlove
  • 1 Post By Redhead14
  • 2 Post By preraph
  • 1 Post By Ashley S
  • 2 Post By preraph
 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 3rd December 2014, 12:48 AM   #1
Established Member
 
Ashley S's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Maryland
Posts: 408
Exclamation My friend talks about killing a lot

Hi everyone! I made friends with this new guy that lives on my street. As I talk to him more and more he seems to frighten me a bit, but I don't know if it's just me. He is really into the "purge" where people can do whatever they want for 24 hours with no consequences, and he said he would love to just kill people if that ever were to happen. Then the other night he asked me if I was ever a "goth" or "emo" I said "Yeah I went through my Goth stage. I am still a metal head, but I wouldn't say I am as dark as I was" He said "Were you into wanting to kill people? Into blood and all of that?" He said something along those lines, and I said "No, I wasn't into that" He said "I was, and I still am"


I am a little concerned. He's the emo type. He has that emo look going on, and he is a very disturbed person, and he gets into trouble a lot. He witnessed his mother get murdered when he was 3 years old. He is actually on probation and went to jail. I don't know what for, but he is the "bad boy" type I guess you could say. Is he just looking for attention? Or is this something to watch out for? Like I said, I don't want to over-react but it kinda creeps me out how he is into killing, and what not. What do you think? Thanks!

Last edited by Ashley S; 3rd December 2014 at 12:58 AM..
Ashley S is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 1:11 AM   #2
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: In His Arms..
Posts: 1,248
Well its not healthy talk but unless he makes a direct reference to committing a specific act of public violence or hurting himself I don't know if there is much you can do I wouldn't want to be around a person like this but its up to you..
TigerLilly78 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 1:13 AM   #3
Established Member
 
almond's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,334
Pretty silly to make friends with and continue to see this guy, don't you think?


I think you should stop associating with him. No need to cause any sort of scene, just avoid conversation and fade out. A quick wave when you see him on the street for a while to keep things civil, then just forget he exists.
almond is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 7:32 AM   #4
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 4,499
You ever watch the news and see breaking stories about kids with guns running around shooting up schools?

Kinda sounds like this guy. Not gonna lie.
__________________

KatZee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 7:54 AM   #5
Established Member
 
elaine567's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 13,340
Perhaps you should alert the police here, this may be just bravado, but with his history, I guess you need to take this seriously. Is he into guns, knives?
Make sure you meet him public places only.
elaine567 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 9:33 AM   #6
Established Member
 
d0nnivain's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Northeastern USA
Posts: 24,693
He may be lost & searching for something & has come across this unhealthy obsession or he may be a serial killer in the making.


Either way I'd distance myself.
d0nnivain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 12:21 PM   #7
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Oz
Posts: 1,673
You need to report this behavior to the authorities.

God forbid he ever went postal on anyone, you'd have to live with the thought that you did NOTHING to prevent it.

Trust your gut. Go to the police and ask for anonymity.
Rainbowlove is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 12:58 PM   #8
Established Member
 
Ashley S's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Maryland
Posts: 408
Yeah, I am definitely going to distance myself. It's just really weird. See, I know about people that look for attention and what not. I thought maybe that might have been the case with him. That he might be looking for attention, but I don't know. I don't think that's the case. I feel really bad for him because of what he endured and him remembering and witnessing his mother being murdered when he was 3 years old. That is so heartbreaking and sad, but him talking about killing is also frightening. Thank you everyone. I am going to distance myself. I got validation on here that I am not being ridiculous and I have a valid reason to be concerned.
Ashley S is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 1:35 PM   #9
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 7,939
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ashley S View Post
Hi everyone! I made friends with this new guy that lives on my street. As I talk to him more and more he seems to frighten me a bit, but I don't know if it's just me. He is really into the "purge" where people can do whatever they want for 24 hours with no consequences, and he said he would love to just kill people if that ever were to happen. Then the other night he asked me if I was ever a "goth" or "emo" I said "Yeah I went through my Goth stage. I am still a metal head, but I wouldn't say I am as dark as I was" He said "Were you into wanting to kill people? Into blood and all of that?" He said something along those lines, and I said "No, I wasn't into that" He said "I was, and I still am"


I am a little concerned. He's the emo type. He has that emo look going on, and he is a very disturbed person, and he gets into trouble a lot. He witnessed his mother get murdered when he was 3 years old. He is actually on probation and went to jail. I don't know what for, but he is the "bad boy" type I guess you could say. Is he just looking for attention? Or is this something to watch out for? Like I said, I don't want to over-react but it kinda creeps me out how he is into killing, and what not. What do you think? Thanks!
This man is either a narcissist or some other disturbance in his sense of self. The fact that he witnessed his mother's death would certainly have caused this kind of break. Are you aware of any history involving animal abuse? This is a huge indicator. He is emotionally unavailable as well. I promise you. I'd steer clear of him.
Ashley S likes this.
Redhead14 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 3:45 PM   #10
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 17,447
I was gothy before there was a word for it, since early 70s and for decades after. I also liked, among many other things, bands like Megadeth and Queensryche. I was in the business end of the music business in the late eighties hair band days and met so many metalheads and of course goths, and I never met any that were seriously deranged or took all the "devil" crap seriously (most weren't even religious enough to take any of that seriously. But I did meet one who was pretty far gone and believed in all that. One out of all those is pretty good considering "outsiders" assume they're all like that.

Abnormal psychology became a hobby for me from the time I was in my teens in the 60s. FBI's pioneer profilers John Douglas and Robert Ressler did research in the 80s by interviewing criminals that easily quadrupled the amount of knowledge we have about criminals. Perhaps the most surprising thing to come out of those studies is just how predictable each type is.

This new acquaintance of yours is desperately wanting to kill. Usually the onset of this is mid-teens with the increase in testosterone and most who act on it begin doing so between the ages of 15 and 25. As you've probably heard, they often begin with killing animals. Then they may start to do home invasions or spying on people. These half-measures will eventually present an opportunity and they often use them for excuses. "I was only burglarizing. I wouldn't have attacked her if she hasn't surprised me" or "We have a relationship. It was just a quarrel." They begin small and if they are successful, they keep escalating.

Many of those kids who went and gunned down schoolchidren were talking exactly as your friends is now. There are people who will never forgive themselves for not giving a heads-up to the school and to the police (in some instances they did tell the school, who chose to ignore it.)

Your friend is dangerous. You don't go talking about wanting to kill people until you're looking for someone to validate the urge in any way. You need to call the police and ask to remain anonymous and give them his name and address and tell them what he's been saying. The sooner you do it the better, because if you cut him off now and then do it, he'll know it's you. If you let the police know he can't know it's you, they can question him in such a way that he won't know. Also, you might get on his social media and see if he has written any blogs about this and you could just anonymously point them to that but give them his name because it's hard to get that info online, takes months and a reason for a warrant, so give them the info. I call 911 on small neighborhood stuff, and they always ask me IF I want to leave my name. But for this, don't call 911, call the homicide division and you'll have to leave a message and wait for a return call. Since you're not reporting an actual crime, they won't need to use you as a witness, but they can maybe make a little file on him and do some investigating and keep an eye on him.
__________________
"I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not better for it." -- Abraham Lincoln
preraph is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 4:20 PM   #11
Established Member
 
Ashley S's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Maryland
Posts: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by preraph View Post
I was gothy before there was a word for it, since early 70s and for decades after. I also liked, among many other things, bands like Megadeth and Queensryche. I was in the business end of the music business in the late eighties hair band days and met so many metalheads and of course goths, and I never met any that were seriously deranged or took all the "devil" crap seriously (most weren't even religious enough to take any of that seriously. But I did meet one who was pretty far gone and believed in all that. One out of all those is pretty good considering "outsiders" assume they're all like that.

Abnormal psychology became a hobby for me from the time I was in my teens in the 60s. FBI's pioneer profilers John Douglas and Robert Ressler did research in the 80s by interviewing criminals that easily quadrupled the amount of knowledge we have about criminals. Perhaps the most surprising thing to come out of those studies is just how predictable each type is.

This new acquaintance of yours is desperately wanting to kill. Usually the onset of this is mid-teens with the increase in testosterone and most who act on it begin doing so between the ages of 15 and 25. As you've probably heard, they often begin with killing animals. Then they may start to do home invasions or spying on people. These half-measures will eventually present an opportunity and they often use them for excuses. "I was only burglarizing. I wouldn't have attacked her if she hasn't surprised me" or "We have a relationship. It was just a quarrel." They begin small and if they are successful, they keep escalating.

Many of those kids who went and gunned down schoolchidren were talking exactly as your friends is now. There are people who will never forgive themselves for not giving a heads-up to the school and to the police (in some instances they did tell the school, who chose to ignore it.)

Your friend is dangerous. You don't go talking about wanting to kill people until you're looking for someone to validate the urge in any way. You need to call the police and ask to remain anonymous and give them his name and address and tell them what he's been saying. The sooner you do it the better, because if you cut him off now and then do it, he'll know it's you. If you let the police know he can't know it's you, they can question him in such a way that he won't know. Also, you might get on his social media and see if he has written any blogs about this and you could just anonymously point them to that but give them his name because it's hard to get that info online, takes months and a reason for a warrant, so give them the info. I call 911 on small neighborhood stuff, and they always ask me IF I want to leave my name. But for this, don't call 911, call the homicide division and you'll have to leave a message and wait for a return call. Since you're not reporting an actual crime, they won't need to use you as a witness, but they can maybe make a little file on him and do some investigating and keep an eye on him.

That is awesome that you are a fellow metal head However you are right. And actually now that I think of it he did tell me a story when he lived in Florida he would throw stones/rocks at birds for no reason. He said he killed one, with the stone, and he was laughing about it. I kinda just laughed out of fear with him, but i'm thinking in my head "WTF?? Sick!!" He does spy on people funny you mentioned that because there are things he pointed out, that my dad did. Like he said "Why was your dad mad and screaming at his worker?" Then another time one of my brother's friends through a brick at the double door because they were drunk and acting like *******s, and my parents are way too lax about things, but anyways one of my brother's friends threw a brick through the double door because they thought it would be funny. He knew it verbatim. When none of us told him how that happened, and he works night shift, and he supposedly wasn't home, so that is pretty alarming. He seems to come over my house when he knows either my brother or I am there. You are very informative and I appreciate you commenting, and informing on this. It all seems to add up. Thanks.
preraph likes this.
Ashley S is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 4:23 PM   #12
Established Member
 
Ashley S's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Maryland
Posts: 408
Quote:
Originally Posted by Redhead14 View Post
This man is either a narcissist or some other disturbance in his sense of self. The fact that he witnessed his mother's death would certainly have caused this kind of break. Are you aware of any history involving animal abuse? This is a huge indicator. He is emotionally unavailable as well. I promise you. I'd steer clear of him.
He told me that when he lived in Florida he would throw stones and rocks at birds, and he killed one doing that, but he was laughing about it. He might have other stories of abusing animals, but that is all I know so far, and I thought that was utterly sick and cruel. I want nothing to do with him romantically. I am just friends with everyone, I am that type of person. However, I am going to steer clear of him because I knew there was something weird about him. Everyone is validating it. He also has a history of stealing, but I don't know what he is on probation for, but I do know he stole a lot. Thank you for commenting, and for your feedback.
Ashley S is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 4:29 PM   #13
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 2,816
Why do you keep getting involved with all these ******* type of men for? And you still wonder why you keep having problems with men. It seems you keep attracting all these bad guys, but you need to change that.
NJ123 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 4:29 PM   #14
Established Member
 
Ashley S's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Maryland
Posts: 408
By the way he is 20 years old. He does steal a lot, he bragged about that to me. I don't know what he's on probation for, but I assume it's because he stole so much, but I am not sure. He told one story of animal abuse. One, he said he lived in Florida, and he would throw rocks and stones at birds and killed one with a rock, and he laughed about it. It's sick. But that's all I know so far, and he does know things that we never told him. He also comes over when my brother or I am home, but he knows when to clock it. It is very alarming, and I got validation on here, that I am not being ridiculous and I have every reason to be alarmed and frightened. Thank you!
Ashley S is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 3rd December 2014, 7:08 PM   #15
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 17,447
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ashley S View Post
That is awesome that you are a fellow metal head However you are right. And actually now that I think of it he did tell me a story when he lived in Florida he would throw stones/rocks at birds for no reason. He said he killed one, with the stone, and he was laughing about it. I kinda just laughed out of fear with him, but i'm thinking in my head "WTF?? Sick!!" He does spy on people funny you mentioned that because there are things he pointed out, that my dad did. Like he said "Why was your dad mad and screaming at his worker?" Then another time one of my brother's friends through a brick at the double door because they were drunk and acting like *******s, and my parents are way too lax about things, but anyways one of my brother's friends threw a brick through the double door because they thought it would be funny. He knew it verbatim. When none of us told him how that happened, and he works night shift, and he supposedly wasn't home, so that is pretty alarming. He seems to come over my house when he knows either my brother or I am there. You are very informative and I appreciate you commenting, and informing on this. It all seems to add up. Thanks.
You're very welcome. Start writing down dates and times when you find out he's been creeping, or just circumstances like the ones you just wrote above. Just write it all down and let the police know that you know he's spying on people and has tried to hurt animals in the past. Right now, you don't have enough for them to arrest him, but if you get someone who is good at what he does, he will see the guy is dangerous and take it seriously and start checking on him, like pulling him over to see what he's up to and maybe question him. It's okay if the cops know who you are as long as they realize you're in a vulnerable position and be clear you don't want them saying "Ashley says this."

Oh, also, be sure and tell them he lived in Florida and where there if you know. They might have a file on him, maybe just a juvenile file, but they may have something.

Last edited by preraph; 3rd December 2014 at 7:11 PM..
preraph is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Messed around with my guy friend and now he barely talks to me avaemilia Friends and Lovers 1 1st March 2013 7:23 PM
A friend that talks too much... redfathom Friends and Lovers 1 22nd March 2009 2:50 AM
My Boyfriend Talks to His 'Girl' Friend More Than Me oneconfusedgirl Friends and Lovers 2 9th June 2005 3:18 PM

 

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 6:27 AM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2013 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.