ExtraSpice Posted November 5, 2014 Share Posted November 5, 2014 I was very close friends with a girl during college. After college we decided to room together and in the beginning it went pretty good but close to the end we drifted apart quite a lot. It was a combination of issues, she was not fond of my ex (whom I was seeing on and off), her bf was over all the time so we stopped spending time together, I ****ed up on some household things which I did apologize for. Anyways after we moved neither of us contact the other at all. It was not as though we had a clear discussion and decided to stop being friends. Both of us just sort of let it be. After some months passed by I texted her saying that it was silly how we just grew apart because of roommate problems and it would be nice to reconnect. She agreed. Well after that conversation neither of us really made any plans to try to hang out or anything. I think I should have initiated making the plans as I did initiate an attempt to reconnect. Regardless I would like to make a real attempt at it this time. I would like to hear your opinions and suggestions regarding first of all whether it is a good idea to try to reconnect now at all. If it is then what would be the best way to go about it? Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 6, 2014 Share Posted November 6, 2014 It's hard to say how she would feel about it. Certainly it's not at the top of her bucket list. I think the best thing to do is if you have any common interests, just text her about something like that: Hey, have you heard the new ______ song? That band always makes me think of when we lived together. Just anything to connect about. If there is nothing like that, then probably you shouldn't even try because you need to have common interests to keep friends. Link to post Share on other sites
cerridwen Posted November 7, 2014 Share Posted November 7, 2014 Why not just suggest doing something specific together? Last time, you left it vague so offer to meet up for a specific activity. Text is probably fine since it gives her time to think about whether she wants to accept the invitation. A call sometimes puts people on the spot, though it *is* more personal. Either way, I think it's a nice gesture and worth doing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
purplesoccer34 Posted November 17, 2014 Share Posted November 17, 2014 (edited) Yeah, I would say text her again and try to make specific plans. Maybe get into a phone or texting conversation, and see what topics come up. For example, if you talk about a new movie that's out, you could ask if she wants to go see it. If she doesn't want to follow through with them, you'll know, and in that case you'll also know that it's probably best to remain distant. Maybe you'll become friends again some time in the future. And if it does work out, that'll be great for both you. Either way, I don't think you have much to lose. I made the decision to contact an old friend (hadn't spoken to him in two years) several months ago, and it ended up being a great decision. I quickly became integrated into his new social circle. You never know what'll happen, even if the two of you had roommate issues in the past. Edited November 17, 2014 by purplesoccer34 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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