Jump to content

His phone has been turned off for a week! What should I assume?


Recommended Posts

I've been casually seeing this guy for almost a year. We went out on a few dates last year, and we both decided it was best to just be friends. So, we've been hanging out and stuff. The last time that I saw him was 2 weeks ago, and he told me that he'll see me either next week or sometime after that, he usually says that and we do see each other. In the last few days, I've been texting him- with no response and I called him and his phone doesn't ring at all, it goes straight to voicemail. I thought maybe he blocked me, so I called from another phone and it also took me straight to voicemail! It's just odd his phone is turned off, I know he must use it for work, his friends must call him. Why would his phone be turned off? I was thinking he might be on vacation and left his phone, his battery died or something...What should I assume?

Link to post
Share on other sites
Art_Critic

Email him ....

 

It sounds to me that his phone got lost or stolen or even broken.

 

This doesn't sound to me that it is about you...

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
Why would his phone be turned off? I was thinking he might be on vacation and left his phone, his battery died or something...What should I assume?

 

Stuff happens. Do you know any of his friends or family? If so, perhaps they might have news.

 

I wouldn't assume anything and simply go on with my own life, inquiring as appropriate.

Link to post
Share on other sites
The Way I Am

Don't assume anything. Just let it go and if he calls you back, he calls you back.

 

That you put so much energy thinking about this and trying to find out if you're blocked, it seems like you might still be hung up on him and the agreement to be friends wasn't entirely mutual.

 

If this were any other friend who didn't reply to your texts right away, would your reaction have been the same?

 

It could be any of the things you mentioned. But does it change anything in your life whether he went on vacation without his phone or changed his number to avoid your calls? Either way, he's not communicating with you right now. Just go about your life. If he wants to contact you, he'll get in touch when he's able to.

 

Caveat: Unless you happen to be the only person he ever talks. In which case, you should probably try to find out just in case something bad has happened to him. But you mentioned he has friends and presumably, he has a family. So they should be able to handle it if it was something like that.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

I guess I need to stop stressing over this! It's just causing too much stress. But it's one of those things that I can't stand if I did something wrong and the other person gives me the silent treatment, I would just prefer if they told me why they wouldn't want to talk to me anymore. But I'm just going to chill out and if he wants to contact me he will...

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

One aspect to consider is that, in general, men relate to their platonic friends in a different manner from women, with regards to communication. I had to drastically modify my natural communication style to have effective relationships with males, simply because they don't generally need to be 'connected' constantly to their male friends.

 

If you're a platonic friend, regardless of any past interaction, the possibility for that essential mindset that consistent contact isn't a necessity, nor are expectations of it a necessity, can exist and you're simply 'not on his mind' as is the case with most platonic friends until something comes up impelling contact. Change and distractions can intrude at any time. He could simply, as I have, had shut off his phone and is living other aspects of life. It happens. Done it many times.

 

If I had a friend whom I've known as long as you've known this man and he suddenly went silent on me, my first thought would be injury, illness or death and I'd simply contact his family (spouse/siblings/parents, etc) or another of his friends to see what's up. I can't think of one friend where that would be impossible to do. YMMV!

Link to post
Share on other sites
The Way I Am
I guess I need to stop stressing over this! It's just causing too much stress. But it's one of those things that I can't stand if I did something wrong and the other person gives me the silent treatment, I would just prefer if they told me why they wouldn't want to talk to me anymore. But I'm just going to chill out and if he wants to contact me he will...

 

Unless there's something you know you did to him bad enough to warrant a silent treatment, then don't worry about it.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Maybe he couldn't pay his bill, or maybe he got a new phone and phone number. If you two were really in a relationship, he'd come over there if he had to to let you know what is going on, so you're not. He could always call from work or just use someone else's phone to give you a call. He's not worried about that because you're "just friends." So you definitely need to stop stressing about it. If the worst happened and he's in the hospital or something, you'd find out through the grapevine I'm sure. And if you don't share a grapevine, then you truly are only ancillary to his life and too invested.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

I don't think there's any reason for him not to talk to me. It's been almost 2 weeks...and we usually text each other, I was thinking about leaving a message. I really doubt that he blocked me though, I mean when I block my number and called him from a pay phone if all went to voicemail. If he would have blocked me, I would hear this phone ringing, right?

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Good news! He sent me a text today saying that his phone died and that he just got a new phone! Whew. No worries now. :)

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...