The busy excuse for attempting to meet up with someone on the internet.

[Armegoggon]

Around 2 months ago, I messaged a 26 year old woman on OkCupid. So we talked every day and we had a good conversation. Then 1 week later, we got to the stage of exchanging phone numbers and we did have a phone call conversation. However, 2 days, later on a Monday, she found out that I was only 18 (turning 19 soon) and decided not to meet me as a date.

 

At first at the end of the phone call she said, we could try next Saturday to meet in a restaurant in a mall. I felt I may have made some mistakes along the way.

 

Since then we didn't message each other much. I tried to ask her to give me a shot but she refused to unfortunately. However, she was able to consider me as a normal friend.

 

I was too afraid to ask if we could meet as friends so all we did was just chat on OkCupid. I went on OkCupid a lot too because I hoped to just move on from her and find a new date. However, this did not work.

 

Last week, I secretly found out she got an official boyfriend relationship at the end of April. I didn't tell her that but I felt really jealous so I decided to text her on my phone asking to possibly meet as friends. I even asked if you and your friends could hang out.

 

However, she said she was busy. I asked if we could try again next week (this week as of this post).

 

 

- She has a job as an assistant manager in a small retail franchise store.

- She works all of the hours AFAIK.

- Hours: Monday to Friday 9:30-9, Saturday 9:30-6 and Sunday 12-5

- She has no kids to take care of.

- She has no post-secondary education at all (only high school completed)

- She has a boyfriend (not 100.00% sure because she didn't admit to me at all)

- I can go to her workplace right now if I wanted to because I can easily bus there in 40 minutes or less but I'm not a stalker.

 

So this Monday, I texted her asking if we could try meeting in person and then she said she's working all week again. I texted her again asking next week but she said "stop reminding me".

 

Finally, I decided to confess to her about my issue as to why I sounded desperate. I told her about how terrible I got on OkCupid and that I would've never gotten this close to meeting someone. Seriously, I've never come this close than her. I also asked her "What's preventing you from meeting me?" She didn't say a lot because she's a polite woman in general.

 

The next day, she told me that she is preparing for an Anime Convention. So she also told me she made a lot of friends there. She told me that it takes a long time to make prepare. Does it really take that long to prepare a cosplay? The Convention is in 2+ weeks from now.

 

So 2 days ago, if we could meet at some point on Victoria Day, pretty sure the store is closed but she didn't respond. Yesterday, I asked her to call but she said she's working all day and busy. Seriously? if you're working from 9-9:30 don't you have time to at least chat on the phone for 15-30 minutes? Her commute only takes 10 minutes.

 

So yesterday, I had a feeling that what if I could come with her to the convention. I asked what her ride will be. She told me a friend is picking her up. I asked for carpooling but she said it might be full. Somehow it's starting to make me feel suspicious. Is that another excuse to prevent me from meeting her?

 

Now the reason I want to meet her before entering the convention is so I can fully trust her. The internet can be a scam sometimes. If we met at a convention, it would be harder to find because it is a big convention of 5000 people I think. Who knows how she looks like especially covered in her cosplay? She may have said she's staying in the hotel for the whole weekend but I just don't get it, why only meet at the convention? Why meet at a place where it's going to be hard? There could be at least 10 other women who like just like her? How am I supposed to tell apart from her looks?

 

So she hasn't responded yet but my question is, if she claims to be busy for the next 2 weeks, in other words, she cannot hang out with ANY of her friends at any point between the convention? I just wanna know, is busy the only thing that's hiding from her? I'm very very sure that those work hours can still guarantee at least 1 meeting in real life. Now if I plan any meetings with her, it will be with her friends. So she has a boyfriend and yet this logic tells me between now and then she wouldn't even hang out with her boyfriend even once?

 

So now I'm thinking, well if busy isn't the factor, what is the barrier between me and her friends?

 

Now before you think I've put my eggs in just 1 basket, well I've put them in lots of baskets already! I've message a lot of women that have the best chance of match% but she was the only one that came the closest, therefore, all the eggs got destroyed except this one. I also think it's a dream to meet someone online for once. I've dreamed about this as far back as my pre-teen years (6-7+ years ago!). Also, meeting people in real life is really hard but going to Anime North with her friends can help me out.

Edited May 8, 2014 by Armegoggon