Jump to content

Friend is a mean drunk


FaithInTheDark

Recommended Posts

FaithInTheDark

I have a good friend in my life ...

She's a 36 yr old woman that is a alcoholic, and she gets super mean, she pulled a episode on Christmas that was really bad but I looked past it,

Well, two weeks ago we were drinking and she got super mean to mostly a friend with us and I couldn't handle it anymore, I told her what a cold hearted she was and I left her house.

I was wAiting for her to contact me about it but she never did ...over two weeks went by so I decided to text her and addressed the issue and basically said her drinking is affecting our friendship.

she told me how puzzled she was I'd bring this up weeks later and pretty much said she had no clue what my issue was.

I blantenly told her she's a mean drunk and I'm saying this cus u value our friendship,

More words were exchanged But she won't take ownership to her behaviour,

I told her all I want is a apology but she says she feels attacked.

I told her it hurt that she can't understand where I'm coming from ...

I'm the type of friend to confront issues , in means to prevent this from continuing.

This friend is a raging alcoholic. !

But a good person when she's sober, I'd be crushed if we ended things but it's too stressful dealing with her drunkeness.

Should I have went about this differently ?

Should I cut my looses? Any advice?

Link to post
Share on other sites
whichwayisup

You are enabling her behaviour actually by continuing to hang out with her and going drinking. you knew from past experience she was a mean drunk, yet you chose to still go out and drink with her and you say she's an alcoholic.

 

Do not go drinking with this person anymore. If you do hang out, go to the movies and do something that doesn't involve booze.

 

Don't expect an apology from someone who is in denial. Let it go and encourage your friend to slow down and consider seeking help, so she can quit drinking. All your friends that are her friends should band together and let her know that you all love and care about her, approach with kindness but be firm that she gets help. Maybe once she has worked through some issues you'll get an apology when she wakes up and sees who she's become.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I will just tell you that in my experience, once you call a person on their addiction, they usually avoid you until and unless they themselves do something about it -- and then when they relapse, they disappear again. It's sad but it can happen even to the closest soulmate type friends. Don't regret saying something to her about her drinking. But wanting an apology isn't really the point. The point is she needs to stop drinking. Don't know if anyone else has told her she needs to stop or not, but if you're the first, then bravo. I was the first to tell a young friend of mine that years and years ago. She didn't do anything about it for 10 years, but she finally did get sober and stay sober and we're good friends still.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I would cut her loose until she sees her problem and gets help. If that never happens then I would say goodbye for good. If she continues drinking and behaving this way within years it will just get worse.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...