Friend has turned to Heroin and Prostitution.

[HeartbroekenInBoston]

(please excuse the typo in my username, not sure how to fix it)

 

My situation: A very good friend of mine of 6 years, has avoided me for about 7 months. The last time I spoke with her live over the phone was last April. I haven't seen her since February of this year. I'll try to make the story background short. I met her at a former job and we clicked right away. We had alot in common as far as our sense of humor and interests. She is a few years younger then me. I'm 34, she is 30. When I first met her she was single mom of a 4 year old little girl. Turns out the father of the child is a total loser, scumbag, you name it. She wasn't in a relationship with him anymore, when I met her. And it continued that way for the next 3 years. Then he slowly wormed his way back into her life. He didn't work and had a long criminal background. I knew he was just using her, because she had a good job and he knew she always had a soft spot for him. I would tell her she could do better but that only made her mad. So I stopped saying anything.

 

They then moved back in together. I would be civil to the guy just out of love and respect for my friend. We would go out a few times a month for a dinner or ladies night regularly. I then moved about an hour away to live with my boyfriend, but I would always make an effort to get together despite the distance. But then over the last year and a half I didn't see her much. She started to complain that she didn't have any money even though she had a decent pay. Then about a year ago she got fired from her job for absenteeism. She was always telling me she didn't feel well but the doctors didn't have any answers. I started to think there was more to her stories but I didn't push her for info. I told her if she needed me to call me for anything.

 

After she was fired, her and her boyfriend were evicted from their apartment. She said it was for nonpayment of rent. The daughter then went to live with the boyfriend's parents. These people aren't that much better then the boyfriend. My friend and the boyfriend then broke up and she went to go stay with some male friend she knew. On several occasions last April I told her I would pay and take her to dinner. I attempted to make plans with her for 3 weeks in a row but she kept canceling. We made plans on a Friday and she then called me at the last minute and said she didn't think she could come out because she with her ex and they were fighting. We hung up and then an hour later she called me back and said her ex took her car and all her money but she asked me to come get her. I had a really bad feeling about everything and I really didn't want to be anyplace around the guy, in case he came back. My intuition was telling me something else was going on. I told her it probably wasn't the best night to go out and out of frustration I told her when she got her self together to call me.

 

That was the last time I spoke with her over the phone since last April. We texted for a few months after that. She texted me and told me her car died, she hadn't found work and that her and her ex were back together living in a Motel 6 room. I told her she could come stay with my fiance and I until she got back on her feet but that the boyfriend wasn't allowed. She declined my offer. She then texted me from her boyfriend's phone one day saying she no longer had a phone and if I wanted to contact her I would have to call her boyfriends phone number. Everytime I would try to call his number it always went to a voicemail box saying "this voicemail is full" and they never would pick up the phone. I heard less and less from her. Over the last several months I would text her and sometimes get a text back. I would ask her if she was ok and she would say she was but I could never get her to come out for dinner or anything. They lived in the motel for several months (I didn't know how they were paying, with no jobs) She then texted me and said she was very depressed and she hardly got out of bed, but she hoped things were looking up because they found an apartment and were leaving the hotel. She said she was sorry that she hasn't been herself and that she missed and love me. That was back in late June.

 

July and August were very busy for me because I was getting married at the end of August so I didn't really try to contact her during those months since I had so much going on. She didn't reach out to me anyway. If initiated contact it was me mostly.

 

So I tried to contact her for the last 3 or 4 weeks and again no one would answer the phone or my text messages. Just yesterday I got desperate and called her mother. Her and her mom are not very close but I figured I could find out something. When I got her mom on the phone she told me that she hadn't seen her in months and my friend was no longer in touch with her 9 year old daughter either. The child is still living with the grandparents. Her mother takes the daughter every weekend. She also told me that she received a phone call from someone that my friend was hooked on heroin. Her mother mostly blames the boyfriend. She said she also believed my friend had turned to prostitution to support her habit. I asked her how she knew and she said that if I googled the boyfriends phone number a bunch of "Escort" ads would pop up. And she was right. There are several ads on a few different websites saying:

 

"Two girls looking to take care of you tonight. Bbw and a size 4 hosting tonight. Text (number) for size 4 or (number) for bbw. Ask about the two for one special"

 

The ads are posted on some Craigslist wannabe sites. And there are two photos. One of a woman with a t-shirt and underwear only and the other a fully dressed bigger lady. I'm positive the one in the t-shirt is my friend, even though it doesn't show her face. The background in the photo is clearly a cheap motel room and these ads were posted last May, when they were living at the motel.

 

Her mom said she has all but given up. Apparently the boyfriend got a 10,000 dollar settlement and they blew through it in a few months. She offered her daughter to come live with her but my friend declined and then disappeared. She doesn't even have an exact address for her. She just knows its off a street in an area known for drugs and crime. Turns out someone sent her mother the same photos off the escort website in the mail. She doesn't know who sent them.

 

After we hung up I cried and cried. I just can't understand how it got to this. I felt angry and I texted the phone number of the boyfriend and said "how do you like being a pimp?" and he actually responded telling me to mind my business, and I didn't know what I was talking about. I told him I knew about the ads and I also asked him if she was using drugs. He denied anything and said "She obviously doesn't want to talk to you, so take a hint" and that was it.

 

I don't know what to do . I feel pretty helpless. And I don't want my friend to overdose and die. This isn't the woman I have known for the last 6 years! Anybody been through something similar?

 

[love1336x]

I don't know what to do . I feel pretty helpless. And I don't want my friend to overdose and die. This isn't the woman I have known for the last 6 years! Anybody been through something similar?

 

There really isn't nothing you can do......

I am sorry... when a person turns into that life. They have to one to saved themselves. I have seen intervention, and even on that show when family and close friends try to save them, they still go back to the drugs.

 

Support her, show her that you love her, but there no real way to save her on less she wants the help.

[Purepony]

She wont change unless she wants to. I would say just let it go and focus on your life

[harrybrown]

Is there anyone in her family that could get her to see a counselor?