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How do I get my friend to see this is a bad situation?


End of my rope

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End of my rope

Background:

 

My friend "Mandy" and I have been the best of friends for going on three years now. We've known one another much longer. She, myself, and my friend "Punkin" are very very close. I'm the loud smart ass friend. She's the semi-slutty one. Punkin is the prude. (We're a strange lot!) So anyway I've moved 500 miles away and am engaged. Punkin is in school and engaged. Mandy is a recently graduated LPN and works steadily. She's infamous for not making the best decisions. I'm rather blunt about things...for example if the three of us are going out for dinner or a movie and we show up at her house and she's wearing something WAY to revealing or tight I'll tell her she's gonna have to change or we aren't going. (I know most of you LSers are going to say that's not my place ..yada yada yada.) That's not the point of this post though.

 

She has, for the past few months, been going out with a real looser. He was divorced but still living with his ex wife all the while still dating Mandy. Then Mandy breaks up with him. He gets married to some girl he'd known a week and now they are seperated. Now he's going out with Mandy again. His first wife has already told Mandy that if she sees her out she's gonna whip her *bleep*. And now the second one is calling her house too. This is obviosly not a win win situation. I tried to tell her from the start. Unfortunatley my "tough love" approach isn't working this time and neither is Punkin's "let's talk about this" method. This guy is a real looser and he's turning her into some real white trash. (I'm from West Virginia, I know white trash when I see it.)

 

So my question is this...How do I get thru to her and get her to see how this situation is only going to get worse? Any suggestions?

 

(sorry for spelling errors, didn't take the time to spell check)

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26thAquarius

As a person who has made many mistakes in the past, I can tell you that you can talk until the cows come home. Your friend my respect your opinion but more than likely she is not going to learn her lesson until the lesson has come to her.

 

Unfortunately it may take something serious to occur,(ie. his ex kicking her ***, or her getting an std). She has obviously made up her mind for the moment and has chosen to be with this man. The best thing you can do for her is not be critical of her(not that I think you are..but when the time comes..dont do the 'i told you so' thing) and just be there for her when she needs you.

 

Friends come few and far between..she will realize this and take your next bit of advice a little more seriously.

 

GOOD LUCK!

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