Al Posted April 14, 2004 Share Posted April 14, 2004 I just got an invitation to a wedding reception in July to a guy friend that I haven't spoken with in probably 2 years, should I go? Here's the background of the situation: This guy used to be one of my best friends since probably the 7th grade (I'm 24). In fact, he used to be close will all my girlfiriends, he was like our brother. Anyways, we were always able to talk about anything and hang out, etc. Well when my boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me, my guy friend was also having troubles with his girlfriend (now soon to be his wife). We would talk every night for at least an hour on the phone just to keep each other company, etc. b/c he lived in a different town. We about a month afterwards him and his girlfriend got back together and my ex got a new girlfriend. Suddenly I was completely out of the picture. My guy friend didn't call anymore, didn't return calls and when he would come home to visit, he would be out with my ex and their girlfriends. To make matters worse, when I started dating my current boyfriend, I heard my used-to-be guy friend making fun of us in a bar one night loud enough for me to hear it, how he can't believe I'm in love with this guy, etc. and laughing extremely loud. Well now when he comes home, I can hear him talking to people about me behind my back and he can't so much as look in my direction or say hello. Now I get an invitation in the mail for his wedding. I think he owes me an apology before I go out buying any wedding gifts or is this an attempt at making amends? What do you think? How long is too long to hold a grudge? Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 14, 2004 Share Posted April 14, 2004 what do you want from this relationship with him? To be good friends again? to get him to stop being rude? to ignore him completely? if it's one of the first two options, maybe it's time to sit down with him to clear the air. Let him know how you feel about being on the outs/being treated so unkindly and then come to some kind of mutual agreement about how you are going to treat this relationship. if this is someone you're willing to let go of because you just have nothing in common with ... well, I think it'd be sufficient (and polite) to send him and his bride a lovely card wishing them well in their new life together. you don't automatically owe someone a gift when you get an invite to an event, but it's always good to politely wish someone well or offer them your congratulations for that event (birthday, wedding, graduation, etc). Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyamI Posted April 14, 2004 Share Posted April 14, 2004 Or you could dress to kill, take your beautiful bf and show some class. 'Cause he ain't got any! If you think he desirves the effort. There are always the persons he talks to behind your your back, and should you choose not to go, it's like showing that you're intimidate by him. There are 2 sides of this story: 1. he didn't realize what an a$$ he's been therefore he invited you to his wedding 2. he knows exactly what he had done and doesn't believe you're gonna show up anyway. It's up to you. Why didn't you go to him from the second he started acting like a jerk?!? He was supposed to be your friend... Link to post Share on other sites
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