WhatDo Posted December 6, 2012 Share Posted December 6, 2012 (edited) I am a guy. I have known this one girl (Jen) for over half my life. We always got along together and knew of each other, but it wasn't until high school that we started to hang out a lot more. We became really close. That closeness is still there after 6 years. We would text a lot and she revealed that I was her best friend, and that she can always see us together. Also in the texts, she would send affectionate messages like "I miss you," "I love you," and describe how amazing I am. I would text back the same. I have always had a special place for Jen, but over the passed year I have developed much stronger feelings for her. I didn't like that I had them because I love the friendship, but at the same time I hate the friendship because I have them, as I feel stuck. I decided to confess my feelings to her and she confessed her's for me. This would be great, but she has a boyfriend (Jacob) of about 3 years. From what I hear (as I do not know him well), Jacob is a very, very needy person. I don't like him, and not just because of the situation. I never thought he was good enough for Jen. She never talks about him, except for when they have problems. Jen and I do not see each other as much as we used to because school (across states), but we do every now and then, and mostly keep in touch through phone. She is the first person that I have had feelings like this about so I do not know what will happen. My greatest fear is losing her altogether. Is this the beginning of the end of our friendship? Is it the start of something new? Is it something that will pass? Is it something else? Edited December 6, 2012 by WhatDo Link to post Share on other sites
The Straightener Posted December 6, 2012 Share Posted December 6, 2012 Hard to say. Are the phone calls and texts less than they used to be? Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatDo Posted December 6, 2012 Author Share Posted December 6, 2012 Mmmm... Sort of. Not by much though. She does have a lot of school work now with finals and some sports and clubs on weekends now. She gets back to me when she can, and I understand she is busy and I do not like to be a pest. Still everyday though. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted December 7, 2012 Share Posted December 7, 2012 You're not a pest. She has feelings for you too, but neither of you can do anything about it because she has a boyfriend. Just be her friend and let her know how important she is to you, how lucky you are to have her in your life. She isn't going to leave your life, from what you've said. There's no reason for the friendship to end. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhatDo Posted December 7, 2012 Author Share Posted December 7, 2012 (edited) Thanks whichwayisup. I felt worried about the possibility of losing her, but you have a point. I feel like I should do something and I want her, but a course of action might make things awkward. I am lucky to have her in my life Edited December 7, 2012 by WhatDo Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted December 7, 2012 Share Posted December 7, 2012 What will help you too, focus on your own life more, friends and family, keep busy and don't make her such a high priority right now in your life. I think this is why you're missing her and hurting.. Things have changed between you two, but it's only natural when one has a boyfriend/girlfriend..Plus of course the distance, you two don't live close to one another. Link to post Share on other sites
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