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I like my friend...A lot, and she knows how I feel.


bubbagump8787

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bubbagump8787

I recently started training for a police department test with an old friend from school, everything was fine at first but then I started to develop feelings for her but was unsure what she was thinking, one day it would seem she was on the same page and the next, completely the oppisite. So one day when I THOUGHT she was hinting to me to say something, I told her how I felt, she however gave me the B.S. line that it was just a really bad time for her right now and that she was going through a lot, like I have never heard that one before. Reguardless we still train together and hang out together, but it is becoming harder for me to be around her knowing that nothing more than friends is going to come of it.

 

So I was wondering if anyone had any ideas on how to get through this because I don't want to just stop seeing her or talking to her. I don't know what to do and I don't want to talk to anyone close to me about it.

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So I was wondering if anyone had any ideas on how to get through this because I don't want to just stop seeing her or talking to her. I don't know what to do and I don't want to talk to anyone close to me about it.

 

I don't think you will find a single reply on here from people who have gone through this where it didn't end badly. The fact that she doesn't receiprocate your feelings will only make you want her more.

 

Get out while you can. Trust me. Walk away from this now. It will save you a lot of pain and misery down the road, 1000 times worse than getting out now.

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Sometimes when a girl tries to be nice and let you down easy, it's worse than if she was mean about it.

 

Why? Because these feelings make us crazy and you'll want to win her over. And if you try to give it some time and then come out to her again it's just going to make it more uncomfortable for her, and worse for you. So the nice let down can make you think that there's hope when the fact is there is no hope (ie bad timing).

 

Bottom line dude, she doesn't dig you and it sucks donkey balls. This is hard because you are training together. BUT trust me, you have to find a way to stop hanging out. Maybe not entirely but reduce the frequency gradually. Also consider whos the one initiating the hang out. If its always you then it's easy to start controlling this.

 

But if she actually initiates sometimes. Then you need to start getting some hobbies, or start lying about why you can't hang out.

 

Reducing time together is the only way to start getting over these feelings. It's going to take a while, and you might never lose interest, but you will come to ACCEPT IT.

 

If you still want to be friends you have to get to a place where hang outs are reciprocated almost as often as you initiate. But remember DONT take her initiating a hang out as change of feelings. I feel its easier for girls to want to be just friends, while us guys... not so much. It's not impossible, just harder.

 

Good luck!

 

P.S. we're still friends, it didn't end badly and we've hung out and kept in touch. This was about 7 months ago for me.

Edited by McLovinIt
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bubbagump8787

I know y'all are right, but obviously I don't want to accept that as what I have to do. However I've thought about it a lot and have decided that I'm going to take the advise, our test is next week so after that I'm moving on. I can't take the hurt I feel when I think about the whole situation. I guess the worst part is that I'm really trying to find someone to spend the rest of my life with and **** keeps blowing up in my face. It's depressing and well just all out sucks. :(

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