Enasha Posted September 22, 2011 Share Posted September 22, 2011 Our relationship is more than 1year now. but now I feel that my guy is very busy and I'm the last on his list. When he calls also he talks about he's work now, but those days he used to pet me so much. I think he has forgotten all those things now. When I say that he doesn't have time for me he says he is working so heard for our own good and to give me a wonderful life in the coming future.I really don't want to give up on our relationship because I love him so much and he too loves me so much.. Because of his work i miss him so much, and when i tell him so he never tells it back to me.. I feel very lonely at times ,and i can't worry my guy all the time too... i miss him so much.so what should i do? please advise. Thank you very much for reading. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 22, 2011 Share Posted September 22, 2011 Our relationship is more than 1year now. but now I feel that my guy is very busy and I'm the last on his list. When he calls also he talks about he's work now, but those days he used to pet me so much. I think he has forgotten all those things now. When I say that he doesn't have time for me he says he is working so heard for our own good and to give me a wonderful life in the coming future.I really don't want to give up on our relationship because I love him so much and he too loves me so much.. Because of his work i miss him so much, and when i tell him so he never tells it back to me.. I feel very lonely at times ,and i can't worry my guy all the time too... i miss him so much.so what should i do? please advise. Thank you very much for reading. It's quite possible he has a very demanding job and it takes a lot of his time. It's also possible he's a workaholic and doesn't really need to work quite so much, but he's getting his emotional fulfillment from his job, and is sacrificing everything else because of it. Maybe you should have a discussion with him about all the time he's putting into his work, and how you think it's important to have a balanced life and allow enough time for a relationship. I know a lot of men who have an extreme work ethic and get a lot of satisfaction from their work, but they sacrifice everything else because of it. One man I know lost his wife because he was working night and day and weekends to build a business. Well, while he was building his business, he was destroying his marriage, and his wife, who felt neglected, developed feelings for someone else and cheated on him. I've had to work out guidelines with my own husband, who has an extreme work ethic because that was the way he was raised. I realized my husband was spending too much time on his business, and our family life and marriage started to take a back seat for awhile, so we worked out a plan we can both live with which would be fair. He agrees to be home by 6:00 p.m. and take weekends off for couple and family time. We also make sure we go on a date night once a week. Those few things (coming home by 6:00 p.m., date night, and weekends off) have really been good for our marriage. When you make your relationship not a priority in your life, it deteriorates, and then all the money your SO thinks will be helping you as a couple will be all for naught. Time together is what strengthens a relationship, not money. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Enasha Posted September 22, 2011 Author Share Posted September 22, 2011 'Time together is what strengthens a relationship, not money'.. yeah thats very true... I will talk to him about this and hope for a beter change.. is that he too needs to spend time with me but WORK come between us... Thank you so very much for your advise appreciate it a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted September 22, 2011 Share Posted September 22, 2011 'Time together is what strengthens a relationship, not money'.. yeah thats very true... I will talk to him about this and hope for a beter change.. is that he too needs to spend time with me but WORK come between us... Thank you so very much for your advise appreciate it a lot. You're welcome. Just let him know it's important to have a balanced life and invest time in a relationship. And not let work to take over one's life to the detriment of everything else. Link to post Share on other sites
Badenov Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 Don't sit by the phone waiting for him. Get out & have a social life. Make friends. Go to new places & do things. He'll soon realize he's not sharing any of it with you. Link to post Share on other sites
pretty11 Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 let me tell you this,If you love somebody you spend time even how busy you are...My mama say's if you want it there's a way but if not there's excuses... Link to post Share on other sites
shayla Posted September 26, 2011 Share Posted September 26, 2011 When my ex was too busy and put me last on his list, it was because he had a whole other relationship behind my back and married the other woman 2 months after he dumped me. Do not make a man a priority when you are only an option to him. I did it, and look where I am....right here angry and miserable. Link to post Share on other sites
Frank13 Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 I agree with Pretty. He is purposely avoiding you. Probably wants you tio end the relationship so he doesn't have to be the bad guy. At the worst he is seeing someone else. Try spying on him. Bottom line is if he wanted to be with you he would be with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Taramere Posted October 2, 2011 Share Posted October 2, 2011 Our relationship is more than 1year now. but now I feel that my guy is very busy and I'm the last on his list. When he calls also he talks about he's work now, but those days he used to pet me so much. I think he has forgotten all those things now. When I say that he doesn't have time for me he says he is working so heard for our own good and to give me a wonderful life in the coming future. Has he asked you to marry him and made concrete plans for you having a future together? If not, then talking about giving you a wonderful life in the future is meaningless. You're bottom of his list all the time...and he's making the minimum effort to ensure you're okay with staying there, by promising jam tomorrow. I really don't want to give up on our relationship because I love him so much and he too loves me so much.. Because of his work i miss him so much, and when i tell him so he never tells it back to me.. I feel very lonely at times ,and i can't worry my guy all the time too... i miss him so much.so what should i do? please advise. Thank you very much for reading. If you're this unhappy in your life and in this relationship, and there's no concrete evidence to suggest that the things making you unhappy are going to abate when some specific (and likely) event takes place, then I think it's time for you to take some initiative and start changing your life. Investing a lot of time, thought and emotion in a relationship that is, in reality, giving you very little is probably the first thing to stop doing. Which might entail making a clean break. Link to post Share on other sites
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