How to make female friends?

[Aflac2010]

I posted another thread on how to get a girlfriend, but my whole life I haven't even had that many female friends for starters. In fact I can only recall about two times in my life where I had even a few female friends. Once in 11th grade, and once 5 years ago. Other than that I've talked to and hung out with women, but no close female friends like those two times. So most of my friends are guys. How can I make more female friends on the regular? Do I need to have a certain awareness, do I have to talk about specific topics? One thing that could be my problem is I'm a man who's into very guy things. Such as MMA, video games, action and comedy movies, dodgeball, Hip Hop, etc. I find that most women aren't into some of those things. Is that my problem? I would have to have more female oriented interests. The other thing I was thinking is that if I did have a female friend who's attractive, I'd probably ask her out, then she'd reject me, then even the friendship would be ruined. What do you think?

[carhill]

Surprisingly, I've found the most commonalities with women, away from being a sponge for their relationship issues, when talking about travel and home improvement. Many women travel on business or for pleasure and more women than ever are buying and fixing up their own homes, either for personal use or investment. IME, a sure-fire way to make female friends is, as you noted, through common interests.

 

I recommend age-appropriate shared interests as a launching point. That could be from school, hobbies, work-related, or whatever. However, do not look at these interactions as a way to 'grow' a girlfriend. Seek them strictly as platonic interactions. If you meet a girl and find her attractive in the least, do not become her platonic male friend. Bad mojo.

 

At my age, most of my platonic female friends are married. Some I've met in my travels. Some are wives of friends. I enjoy all. They add depth and breadth to life.

 

Hope that helps

[Aflac2010]

IME, a sure-fire way to make female friends is, as you noted, through common interests.

 

I recommend age-appropriate shared interests as a launching point. That could be from school, hobbies, work-related, or whatever.

 

Yeah but even when I find women who I have common interests with, it usually doesn't become a friendship. Usually I just have a conversation or maybe a few with them and they just become an acquaintance. I put some of my interests in the last post. What kind of things are women normally interested in that I can talk to them about? And how do I become friends with them after finding out we have common interests?

[carhill]

That sounds about right. Very few acquaintances will become friends. Women beyond the age of puberty generally understand that men approach them for heterosexual relations and IME are selective about who they accept as platonic friends in equal and satisfying non-sexual friendships.

 

Outside of that, the process is very similar to how you form friendships with men.

 

Wrt interests, you meet women in the pursuit of interests you enjoy and strike up conversations. I met a lot of women volunteering at our zoo, and also meet women through car clubs I participate in. The interest is the focus, and meeting people is incidental. When it happens, the shared interest is already there, so talk is easy.

 

Hope that helps

[havehope]

As a female, I like "guy" things - football, the occasional UFC fight, action movies, outdoor things. (don't get me wrong though, I still like to get dressed up and get my nails done and curl my hair). I've always had guy friends growing up and I like hanging out with guys because they're not drama-filled, and they love to have a good time doing whatever, and usually they are very funny. Maybe if you find someone you want to be friends with, you could invite her to something you're good at and want to show her (i.e. fly fishing? lol) or something you're interested in (go kart racing at a theme park is always fun!). Don't change your interests to attract others - then you'll have 'interests' you don't like and you'll be pissed because youll have to fake your interest. You want someone who wants to hang out with you because of you and what you like. Just like your buddies. I would be thrilled if a guy invited me to an action movie, invited me over to watch a sports game of a team we liked, or invited me out boating/etc/whatever. Maybe you could take a class (i.e. karate or whatever) and meet girls who like the same things you do (that way you wont have to change interests) and it will be easier to strike up a convo since you know you have that thing in common.

 

Just my thoughts