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My 14-Year-Old Best Friend...and Marijuana


ASDFJKL

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I am 13 years old. I have a best friend who is 14. He hangs out with a girl sometimes who is a little slutty and annoying...the trouble is, she smokes pot. My best friend occasionally "smokes tea." That bothers me, but I can't really do much about it. I don't even think it's that bad, because it isn't even illegal. So, I guess my best friend was hanging out with the annoying, skanky girl today at the park. She was saying that it was stupid to smoke tea when you can smoke the real thing...pot. She apparently has friends who have access to marijuana. Once of my best friend's friends is considering smoking pot, and now my best friend is, too. I told him on the phone today, "That's so stupid...you can't smoke pot. You have to promise me." He just said, "I don't know." I feel like he's caving in to all the peer pressure. Why does he think this is so cool? Why does he want to do this? I need some advice. Quick. I need to know what I can tell him to get him to NOT DO THIS. AHH! :(

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First of all, I want you compliment the school system of your area for producing a 13-year-old who can compose a post generally free of grammar, spelling and composition errors. I am impressed!!!

 

You need to give up on controlling people. It's OK to express displeasure at their desire to smoke or actual smoking of marijuana...but don't harp on it. Every person must learn his or her own lessons and go through what they must.

 

I urge you to stay clear of these people, however. Pot is illegal and if you are in the company of someone who is in possession of it and they get busted, you get busted to. You need to look out for your ownself.

 

As for why your friend wants to smoke marijana, I haven't got a clue. Maybe it's out of curiousity, maybe it's to be cool and accepted by pot-smoking friends, or maybe he just likes the effect it has on him.

 

In any case, he knows how you feel...now back off. If you must be in his presense, make sure you ask him if he's got the stuff on him and tell him why you want to know. Young people do talk and people do get busted, jailed and suspended from school. You don't want to be one of them.

 

You are a terrific writer...I mean if you write this good at age 13, you are a darn genius. You should see some of the cryptic crap that is posted on this message board by people more than twice your age.

 

Also, don't even take up cigarette smoking either. It's the nastiest thing you could ever do. Kissing somebody who smokes is like kissing an ash tray. It's awful.

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A helpful anonymous hint to someone older could end this situation. What I'm talking about here is cutting off the source.

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Tony,

 

Thanks for your advice. But it's really difficult for me to let my best friend in the whole world make such a huge mistake. I could never allow myself to sit back and watch him mess up.

 

Yeah, he could tell me he would only have one hit just to try it. But I don't want him to say he'll have just one hit...and then have another...and then turn into a pot head! That's what can happen sometimes. Having one hit could be a learning experience, but it could also mess up his life. I just wouldn't be able to forgive myself if that happened, even though I know it would be his mistake. People who get involved with drugs at an early age will be very likely to get involved with other drugs when they get older.

 

You're right. I shouldn't preach him or harp on him to not get involved with drugs. But...Last night, I was so worried I was almost crying. I stayed online until three in the morning trying to find information about marijuana and what bad things it can do to such a young person. I want to give him some of the facts, let him know that he'd be making a big mistake, let him know that I would be disappointed and so would his friends and family...let him know that, no matter what, I would always be his friend. Then, I would let it go after that and let him make up his mind. Is that a bad idea?

 

Raquel

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LOL. Is it really that obvious that I like him? Hey, I can't help it. But it has nothing to do with the situation, and it has nothing to do with the fact that he's my best friend. Period.

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Wow, I'm really impressed with your writing too Raquel, but on to your question.

 

If you try and push him too much about this, he could only end up losing your friendship, what I mean is, if he really really wants to do this, no one can stop him. And those that do, he may push out of his life. I've seen that happen before, so just a warning for you.

 

I was trying to think of what I would do, if I were you. And I came to the conclusion, that the only way for him to forget about the whole drugs thing, is to stop hanging around with those people. When I was your age, if I thought I had "friends" like the ones he thinks he has (the pot smokers) then he will do almost anything to impress them, especially if they are older.

 

I hate to say it, but an adult, especially a parent, needs to say to that kid that he can't hang around with those people anymore. I think that's the only thing that can help.

 

I know that's the last thing you would want to do, because no one wants to "rat-out" or "narc" on a friend (Well, that's what they called it when I was going to school).

 

But if you really want to help him......

 

Talk to his mom, and tell her that you think he is starting to develop friendships with some "older" people, that may be doing some illegal things. You can be even more discrete then that if you want. But whatever you do, don't go around telling everyone he is doing drugs, hehe....

 

Well, I hope someone else here will be able to expand on what I said, because I'm not really sure what should be done.

 

I hope everything works out well Raquel.

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