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How many real friends do you really have?


Sw3etdev1L

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It's lame, but when I get into facebook , and hi5 and stuff...everybody has around 100 friends and more, and I believe it is just stupid and pathetic. I mean.. how many real friends do you reaaally have?

because meee? I have one best best best friend who is a man.

My other friends are girls, but at 24 everybody is starting to mind their own business which hurts me. Don't know why it just simply does.

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my BF from high school, who I've known for 25 years and is a sister of my heart; my two guy best friends and another girlfriend from college, who I've known for 20 years. These are the people who carry me through rough patches and who I've celebrated many good times with, and who I hope find me as good a friend to them as they are to me!

 

as for not seeing your girlfriends as much – don't make yourself miserable, but know that you're going to meet people you will have an instantaneous friendship with and who you'll wonder how you ever lived without him/her thus far!

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I got 2 close friends. Some friends, and some aquantances. Though I usually meet up with the people from my, well hi5, I guess that's the English version of our Dutch hyves. I generally don't add strangers. I don't care I only got 50 people I talk with, where I see half of them irl on occasion. Instead of 300 where I only know 5 :). It's got to do with some people giving it a social status.

 

Sw3etdev1l. Not sure where you live, but I'm always up for new friendships:) :).If you're interested you can PM me, if not, no hard feelings! You're the same age as I am as well \o/ go go 24. (only a week or 3 left then I hit 25, wheeeee :''()

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lonelysoulja

i would say i have 4 really die-hard friends. one in particular that i speak with everyday and means the world to me. she's always been there.

 

but yeah I feel lonely/pathetic sometimes when I compare myself to others and see how many friends I *think* they have based on facebook or what have you. But really that's an immature thought.

 

I do know that I spent lifetime hiding from people and probably missed out on a lot of good friendships, and for that I'm forever regretful.

 

My advice for what it's worth: don't hide, let your light shine and good people will be more than happy to be your friend...

 

and it's about quality, not quantity :)

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I believe this is just better than going to the psychologist.

Really guys, thanks for your opinions, they were really nice.

: )

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...at 24 everybody is starting to mind their own business which hurts me. Don't know why it just simply does.

 

I'm also 24, and I find that people our age are self-absorbed and immature. I care about people a hell of a lot more than they care about me. They're so g*ddamn wrapped up in their BFs, GFs and one-night-stands. There's very little decency among early to mid 20s people.

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You're the same age as I am as well \o/ go go 24. (only a week or 3 left then I hit 25, wheeeee :''()

 

I turn 25 on Jan. 27th, how bout you Joyvke?

 

We'll have to make a "Happy Birthday to Us" thread. :cool:

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I find that it really doesn't matter how many friends you have it just matters if you have a friend who loves and cares about you no matter what......I love the people in my life. I don't have many but I have enough that I know I will always have people who can count on me and I can count on them.....

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I turn 25 on Jan. 27th, how bout you Joyvke?

 

We'll have to make a "Happy Birthday to Us" thread. :cool:

 

25th :). Beat you by 2 days, ho ho ho!

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Apart from family...hard to say. There are some friends who I am close to at some points, but distant from at others depending on what's going on in our lives. I would say 2 female friends and 1 male friend who are really consistent, who I trust on a really deep level and genuinely feel I can count on....but bonds like that take a long time to develop, I think. It doesn't mean that I don't like and regard lots of other people as good friends too, but I pick out two closest female friends are the people who are first to know (even before family) if I'm in crisis. And vice versa. The guy, though he isn't necessarily the best to offload emotionally onto, has been my longest term (25 years) and most consistent friend.

 

As far as Facebook goes - some people I know are rigidly against it because they think it's just for teenies. I like it though. It's a good way of staying in touch, and it's more fun than email. The "X has thrown a snowball at you, throw one back?" or "Y would like you to join his army and play war-games" thing gets a bit irritating though. Do casual acquaintances actually get offended if you don't throw a snowball back, or avoid commenting on the fact that they have "petted" you? There have been times I've suddenly been "deleted" by someone I barely know, and certainly haven't fought with....and I'll find myself thinking "was it because they tended my green patch last week, and I haven't returned the favour?"

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I'm also 24, and I find that people our age are self-absorbed and immature. I care about people a hell of a lot more than they care about me. They're so g*ddamn wrapped up in their BFs, GFs and one-night-stands. There's very little decency among early to mid 20s people.

 

haha that also go for people in their thirties and 40's to!

i hate calling or msging ppl who dont even take the time to call or write back even tho they are suppose to be my friends!

what has this world come to?

is everyone on the lethargic pill? just b/c theres an economic slump doesnt mean ppl should act lazy and not keep in touch.

need new friends big time its making me depressed this new year.

4get this i'm going to see a movie tonight!

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As far as Facebook goes - some people I know are rigidly against it because they think it's just for teenies. I like it though. It's a good way of staying in touch, and it's more fun than email. The "X has thrown a snowball at you, throw one back?" or "Y would like you to join his army and play war-games" thing gets a bit irritating though. Do casual acquaintances actually get offended if you don't throw a snowball back, or avoid commenting on the fact that they have "petted" you? There have been times I've suddenly been "deleted" by someone I barely know, and certainly haven't fought with....and I'll find myself thinking "was it because they tended my green patch last week, and I haven't returned the favour?"

 

:laugh: I love this comment on Facebook. Funny. I got kidnapped and whisked somewhere far, far away. I think I'm still locked up, too. Oh well. And it's kind of embarrassing being nominated as "Sexiest Person" by a Starbuck's barista you barely know.

 

Which leads me to Facebook, in the beginning, it was my ACTUAL friends and family I wanted to keep in touch with across the miles, but it's gotten out of hand now a year later, and I find I'm not on as much or censor what I say through the public channels i.e. wall, etc. I got so many friend requests from acquaintances, and I suppose I was too weak to decline them. *sigh*

 

My family mean the world to me, and probably know me better than anyone and still love me. I have maybe four women I adore that I'd do anything for and know they'd do the same, and a guy friend also on this level.

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I read a study not long back which said people have a core of about 6 really good friends.

 

I had around 150 'friends' on facebook. I spoke regularly to around 10 of them. I couldn't say I would care too much if I never spoke to the other 140 ever again, and I expect they'd feel the same about me.

 

Some of my facebook contacts had between 400-600 people on their friends lists, nobody knows that many people well enough to call them friends.

 

I'd say if you know around 10 people who you can really depend on then you're doing good.

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facebook has been a pretty cool experience thus far: I've reconnected with people from my college newspaper and I'm getting to know my co-worker's kids a bit better.

 

I believe this is just better than going to the psychologist.

 

that's right, baby ... where else can you beg for quick-fix recipes, find comfort when you're grieving and get a reality check when you need one ... for free?! ;)

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Too many!! And they all have demands which sometimes tires me to no end. There are times when I have to switch of all phones just to get some peace, especially at weekends.

 

Don't get me wrong. I am not complaining. I know that I am one of the lucky ones to have such a strong network of friends (about 20 I'd say and we are all friends with eachother.. have been for over 15 years) but I admit I am at the core pretty much a loner so all this socializing really exhausts me when I'm not in the mood.

 

Maybe, it's also the life-style here in this country. People are very outgoing and like to go out in big groups doing all sorts of things. ..clubbing,dining,cinema,concerts,dancing you name it they do it.

 

To give you an idea, at weekends, even at 12 midnight, traffic going into the centre of the town is like rush-hour traffic in the morning. Unbelievable!!! These people hardly ever stay indoors. Maybe that's why they are such a merry bunch and not on meds. Of course, the sunshine helps!!

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Other then my boyfriend and friends I know from work.. I don't have many.. One of my resolutions is to meet new people this year. I have terrible luck with finding really good friends. My last best friend I had when I was 18; well she told me she was pregnant.. I spent a lot of money on her buying her things she couldn't afford, some baby items, food.. Then I found out that following fall when she dropped all contact with not just me but other friends that she lied about the entire thing.. It really hurt.. So I have a hard time trusting people.. There's a lot of nice girls in my boyfriends 'friend circle' that are dating his friends. I'm looking forward to hanging out with them as much as possible.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Zero friends? Are you serious? I'm sure you got at least 1 friend. For me, I have about 4 good friends and like 50 aquaintences who I barely talk to at all.

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Zero friends? Are you serious? I'm sure you got at least 1 friend. For me, I have about 4 good friends and like 50 aquaintences who I barely talk to at all.

 

same here..

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I have many many friends.. but real friends.. I've got 2. With one, it's a friendship of 53 years.. with the other one.. about 45 years. These are real friends.. we have always been there for each other.. always will be.

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My sil and I were talking about this last night. I think she was fishing who to invite to my 40th bday (UGH) this year. I overheard her and my H a month ago about having a party. Anyhow, as we were talking she asked me why I don't have any friends I just hang out w/. Like shopping, going to the movies, etc. I told her I have plenty of friends, I just don't have any that I really do much w/. W/ having families, full time jobs, it's just hard to get together. The only person I go shopping and to the movies w/ is my H and/or our children. I have my teammates that I hang out w/ once a week. I don't go to the bars anymore b/c it's so $$$. My sil ask me how I could I be happy w/ my life w/o going out w/ friends. I told her I'm content. I have my friends and even if we just talk on the phone or email I'm ok w/ that.

 

I also get to the point where I'm tired of always being the one that has to try to hold a friendship together by making the calls all the time.

 

Life is just too busy sometimes to get together w/ friends.

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