agnf666 Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 Oh boy, Do I have an issue... I don't even know how to go about dealing with this one. I know it is not any of my business but I know my dad is going to ask me and I'm really close to him and I don't know what I should say. So, I have became good friends with my dad's girlfriend. I talk to her alot on the phone. Well, today I called my dad and he told me to call her and see what she was up to because she wasn't too happy with him when he called her. He basically was trying to tell her to be careful if she was to come over because of the snow.. but he must have worded it wrong. So, she got mad at him. I call her and she was telling me how my dad didn't seem like he wanted to see her this weekend and how she wasn't calling him back yet... So, now when I talk to my dad later I don't know what to tell him. I mean I don't know if I should say something in regards like "she isn't too happy" or just keep my mouth shut... Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 Stay out of your dad's problem's and don't befreind his girlfriend other that to be friendly with her. You are not repsonsible for his "love life" or his communications with his girlfriend. Tell them both nicely that they will have to work it out on their own. Link to post Share on other sites
Author agnf666 Posted March 16, 2007 Author Share Posted March 16, 2007 You know you didn't have to come off soo mean about it. You know my last dad's girlfriend use to abuse me, so I was happy that he found a nice girlfriend. I'm just going to stay out of his business I plan on it but I just hope that he won't be mad at me. Link to post Share on other sites
curiousnycgirl Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 It was unfair o fyour dad to ask you to be in the middle - and perhaps you could have said that to him, but you didn't AND you called. Since you're already sort of there - you might want to just tell him that he was right, he clearly did not communicate clearly with her, and that she is under the impression he doesn't want to see her, encourage HIM to call her back and then ask that you not be put in the middle again. I would leave it at that, and think long and hard before I allow myself to get pulled to the middle again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author agnf666 Posted March 16, 2007 Author Share Posted March 16, 2007 I really don't think his intentions was to get me pulled into the middle of it. I didn't know what exactly was going on. I was just calling to see if she was coming over because it was her birthday on monday and I wanted to do something nice for her. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 Honey I didn't mean to sound mean, especially to you. I don't think that your father should ask that of you. It puts you in a bad place. I'm glad that you've found a friend in her, I just believe that you have to have your o wn life to worry about and let the adults work out their own issues. Also as communication seems to be a problem for them throwing a 3rd person in the mix can lead to even more break down in communication, then what? You get to feel responsible for the mix-up. Nope, not mean, just think that you should be protected from it. I have a neice that has been put in this situation since early teens and I hate that that has been done to her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author agnf666 Posted March 16, 2007 Author Share Posted March 16, 2007 It's ok... Today has been a pretty crappy day... I'm having my own relationship issues on top of this one. It is wierd that it is the same exact thing going on in there relationship vs. my relationship. I managed to keep the communication strong in mine. My dad is not the best communicator in the world. Basically he looks at me not only as a daughter but a friend. Considering everything we have been through in my life. I mean she is a great person, I just don't want him to lose her over something stupid. Link to post Share on other sites
IfWishesWereHorses Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 You see, this is where YOU start to feel responsible for the relationship. NOT GOOD! Go get your nails done and have lunch with your girlfriends and worry about YOUR own boyfriends. You are the child, not the parent. Don't befriend adults, they cannot be trusted!!! (That's what I've always told my own daughter but the truth is that I want her experience "young adult hood" without the worries of grown adults, she'll have her share of that soon enough.) Link to post Share on other sites
Author agnf666 Posted March 16, 2007 Author Share Posted March 16, 2007 You see, this is where YOU start to feel responsible for the relationship. NOT GOOD! Go get your nails done and have lunch with your girlfriends and worry about YOUR own boyfriends. You are the child, not the parent. Don't befriend adults, they cannot be trusted!!! (That's what I've always told my own daughter but the truth is that I want her experience "young adult hood" without the worries of grown adults, she'll have her share of that soon enough.) Yeah I know I shouldn't be worried.... I'm just soo tired of worrying over my own relationship that I'm trying to move onto something else... and that something else isn't good either. I'm just going to keep my mouth shut and stay out of it. The three person usually never helps things anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 Then what you could say to your dad is, are you sure she understood what you meant by you didn't want her coming over due to the bad weather?? I mean, come on dad, YOU know sometimes us gals read into something that isn't there, or take stuff the wrong way. Then see what he says. This way you're helping BOTH of them, and not really getting involved... Link to post Share on other sites
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