college

[Guest]

so next year's college. Although I have a lot of friends, I have two best friends. Next year they're going to one college together, and I'm going to be NINE HOURS AWAY. They're all oh we'll alternate weekends to visit, and I just know that nothing like that will ever happen. We're not going to be friends after high school. Them deciding to go nine hours away and together, sealed this. Until the inevitable day where they realize they don't know me anymore and we're not close friends, I have to deal with them. Them and their fake promises. Oh, and listen to them talk about their dorm room and how much fun they're going to have. It's been affecting our reliationship lately just because everytime they talk about it it makes me kind of sad. I don't know just how has everyone dealt with situations like this?

[BlueEyedSarah]

I think its something you have to accept and move on to find new friends in your new school.

 

They say friends stay around forever, but it isnt always the case it seems.

 

You may have to put that little bit more effort into wanting it to still be the 3 of you by making day outs with seeing each other that extra fun mile.

 

I think because they are going to the same college they will become really great friends, best friends even.

 

In your new school it will give you the opertunity to meet new people, make new friends and give you that extra confidence boost to knowing you can make friends.

 

You can't be dragged around with your other 2 friends all your life, what will happen when you find a job? All 3 of you can't work together.

 

Keep your head up, smile and think of the wonderful friends you will be making at your college.

[RocketMan2]

Every relationship ive been in has happened around the time when she will be going away to uni.

 

Its ruined all three of them. I promised myself never again after the 2nd, im not sure how i let the 3rd happened.

 

Its a crap time for existing relationships, but a brilliant time for new ones, just think of the latter.

 

 

Rocket.

[IpAncA]

I don't know just how has everyone dealt with situations like this?

Oh you'll be fine. Just ignore them. That's not why your in college anyway. I don't know why but I love the way high school seniors talk about going to college.

 

I went to an different college then my friends did too. I didn't know anyone but once I moved in with 3 other girls, joined a group, and worked on campus, I knew LOTS of people. In fact I lost contact with my high school friends. There is only one that I still talk to.

 

Good Luck! .

[quankanne]

Until the inevitable day where they realize they don't know me anymore and we're not close friends, I have to deal with them. Them and their fake promises.

 

are you saying they're fake because they make fake promises, yet you still want to be friends with them? Maybe them rooming together at another college is the best, if this the case – believe me, you'll forge really strong friendships while in college, the kind that are still going full-force 20 or 40 years later when you're living across the country from each other.

 

if you're saying this because you're worried about how it will turn out, so you subconsciously sabotage the relationship now so that the pain of separation isn't so harsh later ... well, if your friendships with these two people isn't going to be as greatly impacted by this change as you dread. A true friendship survives distances and long lapses between communications, because it's like those things cannot affect the bond between you.

[norajane]

There's only one friend from high school that I'm still close friends with, and I really don't care about the rest, to be honest. I remember it was really sad at graduation when we all went our different ways to college (or not, in some cases), but it really wasn't all that sad once I started college. Met so many new people, made some wonderful friends that I am very close with 15 years later.

 

The truth is, high school is a limited environment. You are friends with people simply because they are the only ones around. Even if you are close, the closeness is driven by the proximity. There is not much choice involved - if you aren't friends with them, it's not like there are 3000 other people around to be friends with. So, you end up being friends with people simply because they are there.

 

In college, on the other hand, you end up having friends because you choose each other - these are the people you have a real connection with, not just because it's convenient or you have no other choices.

 

You'll be fine.

 

Besides, colleges typically don't encourage high school friends to room together because they end up limiting themselves from other friendships. And they usually end in disaster because living with someone is very different from hanging out with them.