love?

[Guest]

i live with a 24 year old wonderful yet slightly introvert girl. shes italian, artistic type. came home christmas day early from her sisters because she was bored. revelled in my company. she hasnt had a guy in 2 years, however keeps mentioning this great guy or that great guy, and keeps me in tune with the guys she is talking to on her phone. barely ever meets them, and when asked why she doesnt, she says "im trying". she is stunningly beautiful, and i know that she occasionaly sleeps with one of her best male friends. she only has 2 or 3 friends.

 

ive always had the feeling that she enjoys my company a lot more than she is willing to let on. im 10 years older, but that dont mean nothing. she saw the break up that devastated me after 6 years with another girl. she will rarely go outdoors with me, or outdoors at all, thats probably a bit of depression. anyway, we play and wrestle a lot, but weirdly always makes the point of keeping her legs closed. when we hug, its from the waist up. she lets me stroke her hair, and sometimes makes a point of avoiding sexual jokes depending on her mood. shes really coming out of her shell as a person, and knows i take care of her. i once asked about any possibility between me and her via her roomate/best friend.

 

this was probably seen as cowardly. she said she sees that i like her, but would never say it. and, hes a friend, and thats all he ever will be. thats all fine, however, i finally got her to a bar the other night, and she stated"with the way we exchange bruises, you would think that we are a little bit more than just friends, huh? also in a description of any guy she might like, she quoted my words by saying.... "oh he could be large, bald, 34, i just want someone who likes me for my mind, and not just my body." we have this very strong friendship, but she also remembers every single detail about me, even verbally, and cant wait to dump her entire day on me when she gets home. its as if we already have a highly tuned relationship without the physical side. god knows i gotta get in shape, heh heh.

 

am i reading too much into a trusting friendship, or is she changing her mind on a daily basis like lots of young girls do? or maybe shes just waiting for me not to be such a doormat of a guy? ive always thought i should do the long term strategy thing, by always being there, and holding the door for her, and making her coffee etc, and i find im doing this anyway. its a tough one. by the way, she is clinically lazy, and loves being pampered like a cat. in the house, we do almost everything together, yet shes never come to my room to call me, or for any reason. incidentally, the wrestling intensifies whenever her roomate is away for a few days. shes highly intelligent, and very hard to read.

 

am i being a moron here? its going on 8 months now, and i know she has a lot of experience with men. my australian friend insists "she will never give it to you, shes just playing with you. she wants the kind of guy whos occasionally gonna let her down" i do have my safety barriers up, so it wouldnt do me any harm if it turned out bad, so no worries there. if i stay in my room for an afternoon, she will jump to sit next to me when i come downstairs, and tell me she was bored all day, and start punching me. we often go as far as regular waterfights, and destroy the kitchen. i appreciate any read into this, and thanks in advance for your help. cheers, tom.

[norajane]

Why not ask her out on a date? What's the worst that can happen?

[vanessabg]

i live with a 24 year old wonderful yet slightly introvert girl. shes italian, artistic type. came home christmas day early from her sisters because she was bored. revelled in my company. she hasnt had a guy in 2 years, however keeps mentioning this great guy or that great guy, and keeps me in tune with the guys she is talking to on her phone. barely ever meets them, and when asked why she doesnt, she says "im trying". she is stunningly beautiful, and i know that she occasionaly sleeps with one of her best male friends. she only has 2 or 3 friends.

 

ive always had the feeling that she enjoys my company a lot more than she is willing to let on. im 10 years older, but that dont mean nothing. she saw the break up that devastated me after 6 years with another girl. she will rarely go outdoors with me, or outdoors at all, thats probably a bit of depression. anyway, we play and wrestle a lot, but weirdly always makes the point of keeping her legs closed. when we hug, its from the waist up. she lets me stroke her hair, and sometimes makes a point of avoiding sexual jokes depending on her mood. shes really coming out of her shell as a person, and knows i take care of her. i once asked about any possibility between me and her via her roomate/best friend.

 

this was probably seen as cowardly. she said she sees that i like her, but would never say it. and, hes a friend, and thats all he ever will be. thats all fine, however, i finally got her to a bar the other night, and she stated"with the way we exchange bruises, you would think that we are a little bit more than just friends, huh? also in a description of any guy she might like, she quoted my words by saying.... "oh he could be large, bald, 34, i just want someone who likes me for my mind, and not just my body." we have this very strong friendship, but she also remembers every single detail about me, even verbally, and cant wait to dump her entire day on me when she gets home. its as if we already have a highly tuned relationship without the physical side. god knows i gotta get in shape, heh heh.

 

am i reading too much into a trusting friendship, or is she changing her mind on a daily basis like lots of young girls do? or maybe shes just waiting for me not to be such a doormat of a guy? ive always thought i should do the long term strategy thing, by always being there, and holding the door for her, and making her coffee etc, and i find im doing this anyway. its a tough one. by the way, she is clinically lazy, and loves being pampered like a cat. in the house, we do almost everything together, yet shes never come to my room to call me, or for any reason. incidentally, the wrestling intensifies whenever her roomate is away for a few days. shes highly intelligent, and very hard to read.

 

am i being a moron here? its going on 8 months now, and i know she has a lot of experience with men. my australian friend insists "she will never give it to you, shes just playing with you. she wants the kind of guy whos occasionally gonna let her down" i do have my safety barriers up, so it wouldnt do me any harm if it turned out bad, so no worries there. if i stay in my room for an afternoon, she will jump to sit next to me when i come downstairs, and tell me she was bored all day, and start punching me. we often go as far as regular waterfights, and destroy the kitchen. i appreciate any read into this, and thanks in advance for your help. cheers, tom.

If you love her very much then why you don't tell her about it .you should ask her out on date then tell her about your love and feelings.