My "friend?"

[BubbleBear81]

Hey- all

 

I dont really want to go into to detail, but here is my problem;

 

I have an issue with a friend im really hurt by. We have been friends for a while now and he always used to flirt with me. I started to like him so i asked him if he was serious about it or just play flirting and he said 'serious' even wanted me to move in and all this stuff.

 

So, finally when i told him how i felt, he seemed shocked by it and just tried to justify his actions by making excuse,after excuse, after excuse, and even made most of it out to by fault and that he played no part in it. When i told him i felt used or expressed any sort of confrontation, he got semi- mad ( at me!) and was pretty insulting with some snide comments. I mean really, what is his f*&kin deal!!!

 

I just want to tell him off and give him a peice of my mind, but with him he never accept responsiblity for what he does, its always " the world's" fault or some BS justifucation for what he did.

 

I'm going to visit my good friend this holiday season and he lives right by her. He has told me for quite some time now that he wants to say something to me in person, but after this littler sherade, i dont know what to expect.

 

Please Help ( i feel really stupid and hurt for having gotten attatched to him)

[magichands]

He sounds very immature, and I think you should just let it go.

[Guest]

a classic case of miscommunication.....u know i think flirting does cause problems...and if its done over email or such...there's always gonna be trouble....

 

best thing to do is face to face...and i thing someone talking about moving in - well, that's serious....would someone say that as a joke? that would be cruel....

 

i would talk with this dude and maybe both of u should talk about the important stuff face to face and still flirt in a playful way in other ways

 

always communicate the real stuff in person - so important

 

my 2 cents [with the devalued dollar now worth 1.5 cents]

[Cheshire Cat]

I just want to tell him off and give him a peice of my mind,

 

Go for it if it's going to make you feel better to give him a piece of your mind. Unless by the time you see him again in person you have decided it would only be a waste of breath.

 

He messed up with your feelings.

Whether he was just playing games with you, or he was genuinely interested at first and then got scared, is irrilevant at this point.

 

If he did not mean to hurt you, he had to accept his responsability and apologize to you instead of getting mad at you, blaming what happened on you and insulting you.

 

My advice is: save breath (unless telling him what you think of him might help you let go), but expecially save time. He is not worthy of your friendship.

[BubbleBear81]

Thanks everyone for your help.

 

I'm just finding it really hard to let go of this friendship. I feel like my telling him how i felt ruined everything. I find his actions to be somewhat abusive at times ( i.e the blame game and saying rude and insenstive things towards me when i make myself vulnerable).

 

He pretty much tried to make me believe that there was soemthing there, for so long, but finally when i tried to progress it he freaked out and pretty much said he didnt want to give m false hope for a relationship, yet for 3 months he played around making me think there was! I think he is pretty selfish and never learned the lesson he was supposed to when he claimed someone did that to him. Because he now he does it to ironically the nice girls, like me. He doesnt know me well enough to have a relationship with , but knows me well enough to sleep with. ( i didnt, but hes always saying what he wants to do to me and with me, and says he finds me physically attractive)

 

He's said for so long he has something to say to me that he prefers to say in person and not online, but after all this i dont know what to believe or think.

 

Why is it so hard to detatch from *******s like this? I'm just really hurt by this so-called friend.

[empathyfriends]

Hi.. surprise.. I went thru the same as u.. worst he even proposed to me wit 100 stalks of roses.. Now he say his feeling is flat.. I'm lost.. will let u know my story soon.

Its hard I do understand.. believe me.. he will repeat again.. Take care dear. XOXO

[vanessabg]

Hey- all

 

I dont really want to go into to detail, but here is my problem;

 

I have an issue with a friend im really hurt by. We have been friends for a while now and he always used to flirt with me. I started to like him so i asked him if he was serious about it or just play flirting and he said 'serious' even wanted me to move in and all this stuff.

 

So, finally when i told him how i felt, he seemed shocked by it and just tried to justify his actions by making excuse,after excuse, after excuse, and even made most of it out to by fault and that he played no part in it. When i told him i felt used or expressed any sort of confrontation, he got semi- mad ( at me!) and was pretty insulting with some snide comments. I mean really, what is his f*&kin deal!!!

 

I just want to tell him off and give him a peice of my mind, but with him he never accept responsiblity for what he does, its always " the world's" fault or some BS justifucation for what he did.

 

I'm going to visit my good friend this holiday season and he lives right by her. He has told me for quite some time now that he wants to say something to me in person, but after this littler sherade, i dont know what to expect.

 

Please Help ( i feel really stupid and hurt for having gotten attatched to him)

As your friend said, he looks like immature leave him and let him go and no need of continue it.