annoying fat coworker rant

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

arghhh I'm the shy one in the office and I really wanna say something to "Judy". She's loudmouthed and overweight and single, of course, and needs either a slap or a good ****!

 

She's the one who will take two donuts before everyone has had even one. She will cut herself two pieces of chocolate cake first thing in the morning in case it's all gone before lunchtime just to make sure she gets a piece! If there's a bowl of candy or chocolate on the table, now it's a big joke we always push it to the opposite end, and she asks for it 3 or 4 times, and it always gets pushed back to the other end, aren't we nice. If someone has a birthday and she knows there's cake, she'll keep "reminding" us to let her know when it's time to cut the cake! Her garbage can is full of candy wrappers.

 

She is not shy about it, has no shame. She had been walking on her lunch hours, and has lost quite a bit of weight, but she hasn't lost the rudeness.

 

Today I was included in a pizza lunch in the boardroom for a monthly managers meeting. She is NOT a manager nor was she invited to the meeting. The boardroom doors were open, so she conveniently came in to ask someone a question and on her way out said "mmmm pizza" and proceeded to help herself with a piece not ten seconds after the secretary had made an "out loud" comment wondering if she had ordered enough pizza.

 

I really wanna say something to her. I'm not usually invited to these meetings but I have a feeling she does this all the time. The secretary noticed this too, and when I left the boardroom she asked me in front of this woman if I thought there was going to be enough pizza. I glanced over at Judy and looked back at the secretary and we smirked cuz I knew that's why she'd asked, but Judy didn't catch on.

 

HR is aware of this, and I honestly don't know why she's still here. I don't know anyone who isn't annoyed by her. I don't think she's that good at what she does because she's always getting caught with nothing to do and is forced to see me or others for extra projects. They had to move her to a desk in plain view because she used to sleep at her desk. Now they have to move her again because they are adding on to our building and she is losing her "window" and cried depression of all things! Oh this is funny....a while ago she wiped out in the parking lot and screamed.....nobody went to her rescue and she came in bawling cuz she scraped her elbow.

 

We all know what she needs but don't think there is a guy out there who is desparate enough!

[shygurl]

I think it's rotten that a coworker (regardless of her size or love of carbs) would fall and get hurt, yell out - and nobody would come to see if she was okay. The way you write about it, it's like you think it's hilarious that she got hurt and nobody gave a damn.

 

I don't see what business it is of yours, that she wanders into these meetings and freeloads on the food - how is it directly affecting you? If her superiors are aware/have a problem with it, they should be the one to call her aside and ask that she not barge into meetings that don't include her.

 

At least she's trying to lose some weight - by walking on her lunch breaks (and you admit she HAS lost weight).....give her a break. She's likely unhappy and not in the greatest of health if she's still very overweight and obviously has such a carb addiction. Maybe she eats food to comfort herself because she knows she's not liked @ work?

 

I think it's mean and catty and petty for you all to purposely move the candy dish to the other end of the table. Sounds like grade 4 to me.

 

What really is your problem with her? Or do you really just generally dislike obese people in general?

[Rosalind]

I don't know...I don't really like to hear people joke about a woman they dislike saying stuff like : "she needs to get laid".

 

That's hardly the issue.

 

I've read articles that state it's common for many working women to over-eat and snack on junk-food when they are bored or stressed.

[New_Wife]

This may sound like utter crap, but my first sponsor told me that when I really despised someone - I had to take them to coffee and ask them 5 questions I didn't know about them. I thought she was nuts. I fought her and fought her on that point.

 

What she was trying to show me was that what I most disliked in others was normally some fear I had about myself.

 

I'm not trying to go all Ghandi on you here, you may just not like this person a bit. But the suggestion of coffee is still a good one (I know, you think I'm nuts). Take her to coffee, and ask her five questions you have no idea about her. Where did you grow up? What do you think about the office? How are things going for you? Who is your greatest influence? How many brothers & sisters do you have? Do you have any pets? What was the scariest thing you've ever experienced? etc.

 

After asking that, if you still feel like the problems are more important to you than this individual you've just gotten to know a little about, perhaps you'd have a feel for how to gently broach the more troublesome ones. "Hey, I noticed that you've had some trouble keeping busy, is there anything I can do to help?" etc.

[agnf666]

I she is doing her work, arriving ontime. Then there is no reason why the boss would get rid of her. Now, I can see some coworkers are annoying but sometimes you have to stick it out. I know it sucks but there is nothing you can really do. Maybe if you would be friendly to her then you can tell her things that she should or shouldn;t do. That might help her from getting made fun of and may not annoy you all that much.

 

 

Maybe there is a way to get her moved to a different area around the office. Hang a sign on the door when you have a boardmeeting lunch. "Boardmember's only" So, that she won't walk right in. I agree with you on that that was rude. No one has said anything to her. Until then it's going to keep going like this.

[loony]

I guess, she's a very very unhappy woman. With her overweight problems and these crappy social skills she very likely has not experienced a lot of romance or love in her life -- how sad is this?

[agnf666]

This is sad. Ic an just imagine who all the woman in the office are picking on her and won't talk to her at all then they want to make comments about she needs a boyfriend. What she might really need is a friend.

[tiki]

I agree that some of her behaviors are sloppy, however, try to find some good in the woman.

 

For instance, when she falls asleep at her desk, does she let out a cute little snore?

 

Sorry, couldn't resist.

 

Okay, (I have to do this too) just remember that we are all God's children and that it takes so many of us to make such a diverse world. I mean, who else would eat all the M&M's and save you guys from getting chunky if she wasn't there?

 

Okay, I'm not helping. I just wanted to tag this thread.

[shygurl]

Originally posted by loony

I guess, she's a very very unhappy woman. With her overweight problems and these crappy social skills she very likely has not experienced a lot of romance or love in her life -- how sad is this?

 

It is sad. She probably, underneath it all, is very insecure and has self-esteem issues and knows that nobody likes her, people are annoyed with her.....likely isn't stupid to the snide comments her coworkers make to her. This lady, however rough around the edges and annoying she is, is someone's daughter or sister or granddaughter......MWC - would you want someone to treat your daughter or sister this way?

[HokeyReligions]

Oh this is funny....a while ago she wiped out in the parking lot and screamed.....nobody went to her rescue and she came in bawling cuz she scraped her elbow.

 

How sad for her to work with people who laugh at her pain.

 

She is not shy about it, has no shame How terrible to be confident in oneself knowing they don't meet other people's prejudicial expectations.

 

 

Does she work for you? Do you work for her? Do you evaluate her work performance? Does she evaluate yours? What does it matter to you? Honestly, it sounds like the 'problem' is yours and not hers. I'm with most of the others on this.

[A Fly onThe Wall]

Originally posted by MWC_LifeBeginsAt40

We all know what she needs but don't think there is a guy out there who is desparate enough!

 

so what are you jealous about ? Come on tell us the real reason you don't like her .......

[scared shy]

So would it be okay if this same woman was skinny and ate all the time? Would you still hide the candy dish from her and make fun of her when she ate a slice of pizza if she had a fast metabolism and burned it faster than she could eat? Who cares if she is fat, skinny, blue, purple? What is the real problem you have with her?

[agnf666]

I bet the problem is that the girl has a better office then she does.... Or she is getting paid more...

 

 

Yah I want to know what the real problem is too.

[lindya]

Originally posted by New_Wife

This may sound like utter crap, but my first sponsor told me that when I really despised someone - I had to take them to coffee and ask them 5 questions I didn't know about them. I thought she was nuts. I fought her and fought her on that point.

 

I think I like your sponsor, New Wife. There are some people who seem a bit obnoxious and annoying at first sight, but if you give them a chance they can often turn out to be extremely likeable

 

Re the original post - maybe the lady's comfort eating. Understandably, from the sound of things.

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

It was a rant okay? I was having a beyotchy day, moreso inwardly to myself about everything. But taking that piece of pizza was the last straw for me today, and better I rant here than in her face. I thought she had alot of nerve to barge into the meeting and help herself to a piece of pizza. I don't know ANYONE in the office who would be so rude. She didn't even ASK.

 

I know this person well - we went on a business trips together and it's a small town, and we have mutual friends. Jealous? Nope I have my own office, she has a cubicle. I make 40% more than she does. BUT I work my azz off and don't sleep or eat at my desk and I use my manners.

 

Oh yeah once I brought a half dozen chocolate easter eggs in my lunch (MY lunch). She asked if I was going to share them. I said no, otherwise I would have brought enough for everyone. (Anyone who knows me knows I DO NOT SHARE CHOCOLATE and they can rant on their own about that part of my personality). It's silly to have to "hide" my goodies cuz she would have no problem reaching over and grabbing food off someone else's plate. I have seen her do this! Whether it's a carrot or a cookie or a taco chip! It's annoying and she's the only one who does it. A normal person would ask! I don't know if she thinks she is being funny or not. She has a problem.

 

I know alot (too much) about her personal life, because all she talks about around the lunch table is her friend's cousin's daughter's neighbor's dog, etc etc if you get my drift. It gets annoying that she tries to fit herself into every EVERY conversation. (this one time, at band camp?)

 

I apologize if I offended anyone about my comments about her size. That really has nothing to do with my feelings for her. She is not the only plump person around the lunch table....one other person gets all of us laughing hysterically and is a very likeable and POLITE person. Our office is a great place to work in that it is not cliquey but that doesn't mean you have to try and be everyone's friend.

 

HR has dealt with her, as she has a history of lateness. She doesn't report to me and it's not my job to give her work to do. Whenever I've been asked to give her extra work, she has done the job well. BUT it's data entry and stuff, and she has a univ. degree so I don't agree with giving her data entry to do for what she is making. They should give her more challenging work to do, but when they do people complain because they don't want to deal with her....such as having her implement new workplace safety initiatives at all our locations.

 

As for the parking lot wipeout, nobody knew what the scream was about until she went into the HR office crying. I never heard about it until our HR person made the real classy move to blab to the office about it. But still couldn't help laughing at the childishness. Maybe she was embarrased but still! C'mon lady you're 28 yrs old!

[Moose]

You know what I can't stand? There's this woman, who I just met, and barely know, that goes and tells everyone that they should agree with her that this one chick she works with is fat, no good at their job, and needs to be let go. She doesn't work for me, but I'd keep the, so called fat and lazy one, and send the judgemental one home a packin'......

 

Attendance is 80% of my evals. Over eating, over imposing, being a smart ass or telling dirty jokes all day has no bearing. If my engineers are here, or on-site when they're suppose to be, they're as good as gold to me.

 

My sister has this problem too, and I've told her time and time again I don't need her opinions on someone I don't personally know, keep them to herself.

[greenhorn]

I would never ever look out for who is eating what amount of cake or what no of candies and getting a slice of Pizza. It hardly does matter at workplace to indulge in such kinds of observations.

 

One should concentrate on work and if someone is stuffing so much that others are not getting to eat then only it should be noticed.

 

If some one is over weight or underweight, it is a personal thing and extrapolating it for being unhappy or issues is totally uncalled for.

 

Let's be professional at workplace atleast.

[loony]

Originally posted by greenhorn

Let's be professional at workplace atleast.

Workplace is not only workplace and if you ignore the importance of human interactions you very likely ignore an important factore that influences the productivity at work. If this was a factory in China maybe then it wouldn't matter that much if people were happy or not, but in Western countries it's a factor. Simply for selfish reasons you want the workers to be happy.

[greenhorn]

Human interaction is quite different than ranting about someone who eats more candies or gets one slice of pizza. I am not sure of china but other countries have equal good human interactions between workers. We all have team dinner and team outing all for this.

 

On a side note I consider it quite 'cheap' if some one keeps an eye on how much other is eating from office pantry.

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

Originally posted by Moose

My sister has this problem too, and I've told her time and time again I don't need her opinions on someone I don't personally know, keep them to herself.

 

Exactly why I posted my rant here cuz I don't have a diary.

[Rosalind]

I think what Moose is getting at is - many people are not interested in engaging in gossip about someone they don't personally know.

 

Do you not realize you are posting on the world wide web?

[scared shy]

MWC_LifeBeginsAt40

 

Let me just say and this is my personal opinion you were not ranting, you were being overtly mean and judgmental. Your second post just seemed like a long list of excuses as to why you "vented" about this person in the first place...

it sounds like you have nothing better to do all day than observe this person who annoys you so. Why do you care what she eats or if she is doing her job? What business is it of yours? Does she pay your bills, does she eat all your groceries? I understand venting cause that's what I come on here to do, and everyone else, either about broken hearts or doctor's who do not wash their instruments (that one still blows me away) but this rant seemed very cruel. Since you seem to have such a problem with it why have you not confronted her about it? Or is snickering behind her back with the secretary much easier?

[scratch]

MWC, when people see you ranting about someone for whom they feel sorry, they will tend to take her side. Rants about the rich, skinny and beautiful will be met with far more approval in this forum, and probably most places where regular people interact.

 

My suspicion is that had you omitted details about her weight, this thread would have taken a different tone. Hopefully the criticism will roll off your back. I'd strongly advise against defending yourself to Those Who Feel They Are Without Sin.

 

As for me, I thought it was pretty funny, and know a person or two like that. And I've got my bag of Stones handy.

[MWC_LifeBeginsAt40]

People are free to say what they want to me, about me, behind my back, and they can judge me as they see fit, and do you think I care? NO I don't give a crap because everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and opinions.

 

I thought it was so typical of her to conveniently come into the boardroom KNOWING there was pizza and acting surprised MMMMM PIZZA and not even ASKING for a piece, just assuming the OWNER of the company who was sitting right there, would be okay with it. I didn't look at him, but I'm sure he was floored by her actions.

 

Why do you care what she eats or if she is doing her job? What business is it of yours? /

 

I care when she's reaching over eating MY lunch. Okay, sometimes she uses manners and asks "Can I have a carrot?" or "Can I try some of your soup?" Another coworker once said to her "you know, it's pretty rude to ask someone for their food they brought for their lunch. I would never think of doing that". The whole table fell silent and everyone was thinking FINALLY someone said something. Do you thing she got the hint? see above rant for answer.

 

Sorry, I have no sympathy for her. She is just plain RUDE! I would think the same if it was a relative or a close friend and not even in a workplace, that really has nothing to do with it.

[alphamale]

Almost everyone has at least one annoying habit that other notice or comment on. It may be wearing bad clothing, body odor, over-eating, over drinking, not being nice, being too nice, bad teeth, bad hair, ugly, too good looking, too short, too fat, too tall, not fun to be around, not exciting enuf, not enuf money......whatever.

 

I think you should leave the woman alone as long as she does not bother you. She is making herself look like an idiot already and you know everyone is laughing at her. That should be consolation enuf.