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Protecting Your Career From Sexual Harassment Allegations


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Old 29th November 2017, 7:54 PM   #1
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Protecting Your Career From Sexual Harassment Allegations

Protecting Your Career From Sexual Harassment Allegations

This thread is a strategy guide for those worried about being falsely accused of sexual harassment at work. The time has come for us to take serious precautions in order to protect our jobs and livelihoods from hostile forces beyond our control. I hope we can brainstorm some ideas here about how to make our professional lives more secure.

These days anyone can make a sexual harassment / assault allegation and be believed prima facie, with no subsequent hearing or evidence considered. The rule of law and due process doesn't apply to many cases in the private sector. With the current mob mentality, you are guilty until proven innocent, and 9 times out of 10 you will never get that chance to prove you are innocent.

What this means for you is that your career and livelihood is constantly in jeopardy, no matter how successful you are or how hard you have worked. ANY allegation is now grounds for summary dismissal and can ruin your life.

Accusers can make up things from decades ago and get you fired, so the smart thing to do is to begin to protect yourself NOW.

Basic Steps You Can Take:

1.) Never engage in romantic relationships with coworkers

You may like someone at work. That's only natural. But remember that relationships often don't work out, and your former BF / GF may seek revenge on you out of spite. To maintain your security: NEVER ask anyone (of the opposite sex) out at work with the intent of getting to know them personally / romantically. ONLY go out with coworkers in a group setting. Never give anyone a ride home when it is just you and the other person in the vehicle. ALWAYS be with other people if you hang out with coworkers, and never show any romantic interest to any person you work with. Remember, any advances you make, no matter how innocent, can be used against you in the future. It's not worth losing your job, so avoid it.

2.) Compartmentalize Your Relationships

When you do get involved with someone (who doesn't work with you), keep your work and romantic lives completely separate. Ideally, your partner should not know where you work or what you do until many months of trust have been built up in the relationship. Even then, keep the worlds of work and romance as far apart and segmented as possible. This will limit your partner's ability to sabotage your career if things go wrong in the relationship. On the flip side, those at work should not know who your partner is. They should know you are married, or otherwise involved with someone, but they should have as few details of your partner as possible. They should know just enough to know that you're not available romantically. And even if you are single, you should tell coworkers that you're in a relationship, so that none of them will try to become romantically involved with you.

3.) Always leave the door to your office open during private meetings

This holds true especially if you're a manager. You should leave the door open or meet your employees in a public area where others can verify what happened. NEVER meet an employee or coworker behind closed doors if you can avoid it. They can later make up things that never happened. If they ask to speak to you in private, go to a public, open area where others can see you but not hear you.

4.) Consider Recording All Conversations / Meetings for Your Protection

It's easy to set up surveillance of an office with video and audio. The system can be running 24 /7, whenever you're in the office or meeting with someone. You can easily archive video on dedicated hard drives over many years, keeping a record of every meeting that you had. Even if you happen to lose one recording of a meeting from 10 years ago, you will have enough video to establish a track record of professionalism that will hopefully be enough to prove your innocence.

5.) Set up a verification system for all meetings

Whenever you have a meeting (private or otherwise), it should be logged and verified in some kind of system. The participant should have to sign a ledger confirming the time and place of the meeting (which should be as public a place as possible) and what the meeting was about. In this way, nobody meets you without a reason, and that reason is verified by the employee / coworker. Also, when you do meet in a public place, you can use a phone or other device to record the audio contents of the meeting. You can then log this in a perpetual archive.

6.) Keep an archive of all email / text message correspondences

Your email client will do this anyway, but whenever you can keep back up copy of correspondences between you and a coworker, do it.

7.) Build up alliances of trust

It goes without saying, but you should always be working to build alliances of trust with people. The more people you work with who know your protocols when it comes to meeting, and who know that you are not the kind of person to engage in sexual harassment, the better. These people will hopefully be able to come to your aid in a time of trouble.



Conclusion

Those are a few of my suggestions for protecting yourself at work. Things are pretty crazy right now, and no matter how successful you are, or how well you have treated others in your life, a target can be put on your back. The only avenue is taking preemptive measures to limit your risk. I welcome your suggestions to add to this brainstorm.

Thanks,
Dave

Last edited by Power_Forward; 29th November 2017 at 7:57 PM..
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Old 29th November 2017, 7:58 PM   #2
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Just ignore women. Many problems solved
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Old 29th November 2017, 9:15 PM   #3
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Just ignore women. Many problems solved
I know you're joking, but I don't agree with that approach. Sexism is not a viable solution to this problem. Personally, women make my life richer in many ways. Overall, they're indispensable contributors to society. I just think that at this point a risk management strategy is needed regarding protecting one's career, because there really are very few safeguards in place to shield us.
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Old 29th November 2017, 9:31 PM   #4
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No, I'm serious. I've always treated women in the workplace like eunuchs. Life is much simpler that way. Zeroes. Machines. Just like men. Machines to make a profit from. It's not personal, just business. Never hired, never dated, never had sex with, never really cared about. Of course that's easy working in an industry women avoid like the plague. I mean, who wants to get smelly, dirty and greasy? Oh, my nails!
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Old 29th November 2017, 9:39 PM   #5
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Rule #1: don't be a creep
Rule #2: see rule #1

But I hear you on the intent of this thread.
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Old 29th November 2017, 9:44 PM   #6
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OK, I may have screwed up one time. Made a hand machined brass plaque for a vendor's manager who was, oh my, smokin' hot. She had that on her desk for a decade but had a firm rule of not dating customers until, yup, a rich enough one came along and heh, boom, married that one. However, I never harassed her. Asked her on a date, she declined, EOS. That's life!
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Old 29th November 2017, 10:17 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Mrin View Post
Rule #1: don't be a creep
Rule #2: see rule #1

But I hear you on the intent of this thread.
This thread isn't for creepy guys. Creepy guys (and girls) deserve what they get if they're legitimately sexually harassing others.

This thread is for all those people playing it by the book but are still at risk of being targeted for reasons unrelated to their actual behavior (i.e. revenge, vindictiveness, or some strategic machination). It especially concerns those who have achieved financial success in their lives.
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Old 29th November 2017, 10:34 PM   #8
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Treat all females as potential plaintiffs in a lawsuit. I recall watching a vendor's wife, our local DA, in action and, whoa, pull back a bloody stump from that one. I have no idea why the voters took her out. She was a shark. I always thought of her when feeling the buzz in the balls regarding any warm bodies I encountered. Sobering.
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Old 29th November 2017, 11:35 PM   #9
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I don't dispute the validity of your suggestions, but there seems to be a presupposition of false claims. Do you feel that many of the current highly publicized sexual misconduct allegations are false?

In the present climate, I don't doubt that false claims will be happening. Women can lie as well as men can. That said, from my POV what is going on today is actually about sexual harassment rather than innocent men being accused.
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Old 29th November 2017, 11:50 PM   #10
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I don't dispute the validity of your suggestions, but there seems to be a presupposition of false claims. Do you feel that many of the current highly publicized sexual misconduct allegations are false?

In the present climate, I don't doubt that false claims will be happening. Women can lie as well as men can. That said, from my POV what is going on today is actually about sexual harassment rather than innocent men being accused.
Well, there's obvious cases such as the Duke Lacrosse team and the soccer player Ched Evans. Both were falsely accuse of rape and pilloried in the media before a trial. (Ched Evans actually spent 2 years in prison before being exonerated at a retrial). It is shocking how quickly someone will be found guilty in the court of public opinion, especially regarding sexual harassment / assault.

But many cases fly under the radar and aren't covered in the media. It's easier for companies to simply fire the accused person after an "investigation" in order to avoid bad publicity. A journalist was fired not too long ago by the independent media organization "The Young Turks" after spurious and disputed allegations were made against him. And this doesn't get into the men who are falsely accused and then imprisoned for many years.

Renowned attorney Alan Dershowitz was accused of sexual abuse two years ago. He was adamant in his denial and called on the accuser to make a deposition, to accuse him in court. She never did because she was lying. She knew that if she accused him on record, she would be found guilty of either defamation of character or perjury. He was smart in that he went on the offensive and called her out publicly. Anyone else who is falsely accused should do the same.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GaZhcDWoQ7s

Also, many cases seem to be lumped in together and treated with the same severity. This is why extreme caution must be the modus operandi for all concerned people from now on.

Last edited by Power_Forward; 29th November 2017 at 11:56 PM..
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Old 30th November 2017, 12:04 AM   #11
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On a more serious note, I did post one spicy bit of advice from a forward-thinking attorney who helped us years ago...

Never be alone with a female employee, ever. Always have at least one witness, preferably female and a manager and consider any female employee an employee everywhere, even off the clock a zillion miles from work.

So sad that world has come to this. So glad when I'll be off the planet. What a mess.
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Old 30th November 2017, 4:04 AM   #12
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As a business owner in a male dominated business, I get saleswomen that cold call at least once a month that are dressed more like they are going to a club or late night party than doing business....And very young as well...Never over 30..Very short skirts and low cut tops..And they are deliberately flirtatious,..I'm not stupid, they know what they need to do to close a guy...

Years ago, I may have let them make their presentation, always being careful and respectful, and even though I wasn't really interested or really didn't have the time to talk, it was a nice break from having nothing but guys around all the time..So I entertained the pitch...

Now, I stop them at the door and tell them politely that I don't have time to talk or I am just not interested....I just don't need the potential aggravation...

I do think it is an issue now...Its not just a criminal thing, either...If someone wants to wreck your life, the power of the internet/social media allows anyone to broadcast something onerous that can be seen by thousands instantly...There isn't much recourse. either...

Thankfully, I am not in any kind of corporate world, where I am sure the opportunities are more frequent....I think guys do need to be more vigilant and on their toes...

TFY
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Old 15th December 2017, 2:26 PM   #13
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I was reading some content today which brought this topic back to mind, specifically where the original contact was, at least as recounted by the female, ambiguous to desired and then, later, she changed her mind about it being wanted due to being 'ashamed' and came to label it 'harassment'.

I can see how that change of mind can occur and also how it can do a disservice to women who are overtly harassed in the workplace without any ambiguity about it being wanted or unwanted.

I'm brought back to this bit of humor:

https://www.liveleak.com/view?i=db6_1370665965

Imagine the contact from the very desirable Tom Brady being wanted and then, later, the woman changes her mind for any reason or no reason at all and deems it 'harassment'. How does that go? I'd be especially interested in interactions where, as is typical, the woman is passive and 'let's it happen', meaning no evidence of overt acts by herself exist.

One more reason to avoid interaction with women at all in the workplace? IDK. TBH, I'm sorry it's come to this.

A suggestion I offered elsewhere is likely lost on people but IMO women hold a ton of power here. They choose who they love, validate, have sex with and procreate with and socialize offspring with. Why choose one of these guys, the harassers, molesters, diddlers, as evidenced in all the media of late? Why validate their existence with your loyalty and producing their spawn? Be the instigators of change. Leave them be. Don't reward such behavior with your time, attention and love. Be the change.
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Old 15th December 2017, 3:03 PM   #14
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As far as the suggestions are concerned:

1) Yes, very much this. Office romance will likely bite you in the rear.
2) This seems like overkill to me, and I'm a fairly cautious person in this regard. Having social contacts outside of work will foster your career.
3) Not always possible. I will however have another woman present during difficult discussions. I will not interview a woman without another female interviewer.
4) Illegal where I Iive.
5) Not feasible where I work, my company sets the standards.
6) Also not feasible where I work. Regulations determine the retention policy, not I.
7) Yes, very much this. I have a female boss, and it is not a problem going out having drinks with her. But she knows that she can trust me, and vice versa.
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Old 15th December 2017, 3:16 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thefooloftheyear View Post
As a business owner in a male dominated business, I get saleswomen that cold call at least once a month that are dressed more like they are going to a club or late night party than doing business....And very young as well...Never over 30..Very short skirts and low cut tops..And they are deliberately flirtatious,..I'm not stupid, they know what they need to do to close a guy... [...]
Like that account rep from an IT consulting company who tried to get on my calendar all the time. She didn't know that much about IT, but prior to her current gig she was a professional volleyball player in Brazil. (A pure coincidence, of course.)

Sales will be sales.
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