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-   -   didn't go to graduate school, feeling like a failure. (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/business-professional-relationships/635262-didn-t-go-graduate-school-feeling-like-failure)

HiCrunchy 17th September 2017 9:43 PM

didn't go to graduate school, feeling like a failure.
 
Hello,

I recently graduated college with a degree in chemistry. I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life so I just got a job as a coordinator at Columbia University.

I recently found that I want to become a nurse and get my masters in nursing at Columbia and am interested in applying.

I need to complete a few pre-requites for the program and just got a B- in one of the classes that I need to get a B in (and what makes me so angry is that it was I had a mental breakdown the day before my final because of my mother for reasons I do not wish to get into). Now I won't have time to complete my application in time before the october deadline next year. Now I will have a 3 year gap over a 2 year gap before I get into the program. A part of me feels a little bit like a failure since most of my peers are entering medical school and graduate programs.

Part of me was thinking that since I have a year off I can volunteer at a hospital as a resume builder since I will have extra time after I complete my prerequisites.

I feel like such a failure when compared to my peers.

Gillys 17th September 2017 9:57 PM

Don't feel like a failure, you just graduated with a degree in chemistry! That's a very difficult major at most universities. During your time off after your pre-requisites you can spend some time beefing up your resume/application. I know the longer gap seems like a disadvantage now but your real world experience will probably look better than someone who just jumped into a nursing graduate program fresh out of college. You'll have work or volunteer experience that will definitely show when it's time for your clinical rotations. Keep doing what it takes to reach your goal if you want to become a nurse.

DarrenB 18th September 2017 12:53 AM

Never compare yourself to peers, colleagues, advisories or anyone. Their characteristics and attributes compared to yours is irrelevant.

From what you've stated it appears to be understood that you've achieved quite a lot of success and pride in a relatively short period of time, that's something that you've done entirely by your own doing and that you should be proud of.

Everyone makes progression at their own pace, and often they believe there's more to just patience and succeeding, but fundamentally it's all progression and development really is, also a hint of willingness to persevere and such.

Your friends's career paths and lifestyles are completely different to yours, therefore the progression for each one is different. Focus on your own career and I'm sure you will thrive.

carnelian 18th September 2017 3:28 PM

Forgive yourself!

It sounds like a minor setback toward your goal. The extra time probably will make no difference, though I don't know all the facts. Chemistry is not the best major for nursing however.

georgia girl 19th September 2017 5:54 AM

It's natural to compare yourself with your peers and wonder where you went wrong sometimes. But don't linger there and know you have nothing to be ashamed of. Life is not a sprint to see who finishes first. Enjoy this time in your life. You have now decided on a path which seems very fulfilling to you. Take this year and volunteer to see what career paths are open to an NP. Look at hospitals and at clinics and specific disciplines such as surgery, dermatology, cardiology, etc. Really explore while also building up a little seed money from your paying job to pay for grad school.

Please don't be in a hurry to "catch up" with your peers. I did that myself and I ended up becoming a super overachiever, much to the expense of my personal life. While I can now semi-retire at a young age, I still regret so much how much I missed when I was so fixated on advancement. You only get one ride. Enjoy it.

d0nnivain 1st October 2017 4:11 PM

You are not a failure. You are on a different path. Find things to learn & grow as you spend that other year wisely.

Which is more important to you - the school (Columbia) or the time (2 v 3 years) A B- in whatever class doesn't get you into Columbia may get you into a graduate nursing program in a different school nearby. Have you tried NYU, St. John's, Seton Hall, UMDNJ etc.?


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