LoveShack.org Community Forums

LoveShack.org Community Forums (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/)
-   Business and Professional Relationships (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/business-professional-relationships/)
-   -   Co-Worker Is Taking Over My Job (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/platonic/business-professional-relationships/634042-co-worker-taking-over-my-job)

newlywedder 5th September 2017 10:13 AM

Co-Worker Is Taking Over My Job
 
Hi! I been a contractor a this job for more than nine months now and it has been going great, until a new co-worker was hired last month. He has the same job as me, which is a UI/UX designer but is working for another manager.

For whatever reason, they merged his manager's people and my manager's people together into one team. His manager doesn't have anything ready for him to do yet so he has been welcome to work on the website that my manager is responsible for.

Before this guy was hired, whom is named Kevin, I was the only designer on the team so was responsible for designing all the UI/UX for everyone. There wasn't many projects, so on the side, I would do styling in CSS on the website we are building for the company.

Now, everyone goes to Kevin for all the UI/UX design and all the styling so I have no work to do. I been doing training on my own because of this problem I am having. I am also the only female on the team as well, please note.

We are in an Agile/SCRUM environment so each week we are assigned projects. Kevin was assigned to design the website with me and this other guy who does Front End Development named Lance. He decided to team up with the guy only and left me out of the project.

After which seemed like begging, I was thrown a few "bones" of work like an icon set and writing copy for some parts of the site. I got done with those quickly but he ignored any other requests to help with anything else. Kevin and Lance decided they would design the whole website themselves.

On Thursday, I had an emotional outburst during a meeting when they were assigning tasks on the board. Only Kevin and Lance's name were up on the board under the project. I think they decided that they just wanted to work by themselves and not with me.

It made me so upset that I yelled out and alerted my boss that Kevin has been taking all my work. I said I had nothing to do anymore and that I was worried I was going to be fired. Then, I started sobbing in a heap of tears in front of everyone!

My boss told everyone to get out and talked with me about what has been going on. He said that I am not going to be fired but in the process of being hired on to the company. I am contractor right now. He said he would talk to Kevin and Lance about including me in the project.

I am now wondering what you would do in this situation. Would you look for work elsewhere or see if things improve here? I think I got myself here because I am not assertive at all and let Kevin do this to me. I'm worried that everyone thinks I am weak and a big baby for crying in front of them too. :( I feel like I am not valued at this job because Kevin seems to be better than me at designing and styling so that is why people have been preferring his work over mine.

stillafool 5th September 2017 10:41 AM

Yes I would start looking for work else where. They are certainly not going to keep you around with hardly anything to do regardless of what your boss told you. I think the emotional outbreak along with the crying was a bit too much. Especially if your boss had to ask everyone to leave. That certainly didn't help your case and made you look weak.

O'Malley 5th September 2017 12:36 PM

Work on being more calmly assertive - yes, you can get another job but the same dynamic may occur and it's best to learn how to address it. While the outburst wasn't the way to get your concerns across (although it's understandable to be stressed and upset about what's been going on), I would be upfront with Kevin: "I'm having trouble getting responses from you about my potential contributions towards (specific project). How can we address this so that we can move forward on this project?" It then puts him on notice that you're peers and should be acting like team players.

If he continues to ignore or to only delegate small tasks, I would be clear with your supervisors that a) you've repeatedly offered assistance on several projects, only to be either ignored or turned down and b) your desire to make substantive contributions to these projects. Focus the conversation where it rightly belongs on the lack of effective team building and cooperation and take note if the dynamic changes. If not, it's time to start looking for better opportunities.

anika99 5th September 2017 3:13 PM

While I was reading your post I got the feeling that this is a bit of a boys club where the team members sort of consciously or subconsciously felt more comfortable and secure dealing with other men. Unfortunately your emotional outburst likely only confirmed their belief that women are not competent or that women are too emotional to be good team leaders or members.

I'm not judging you. Many Years ago I had an emotional meltdown at work in front of my manager and supervisor. I still cringe when I think about it. I realized later that I should have addressed the problems I was having long before I got to that state of frustration. I would advise you to do the same going forward. Do your best to continue to address this situation with your boss in a calm professional manner. Maybe after some time has passed your outburst will be forgotten and things will get better. I would still keep your ears open for other jobs though.

newlywedder 5th September 2017 8:10 PM

@Anika99 ~ Yes it does feel like a boys club but everyone has been very nice to me. The job was going great and really awesome before Kevin came aboard. Now, I don't know my place on the team and feel left out on things. Sorry to hear about your meltdown. That sounds like it was quit painful and I bet it still upsets you. I have a phone interview for another job tomorrow during lunch so I will see what happens.

@O'Malley ~ That's great advice!

@stillafool ~ That is true. I'm trying to learn new skills so I can bring more to the team and any other team or company I may join the future. My boss knows I am paying a lot of my own money for schooling.

TheFinalWord 6th September 2017 12:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newlywedder (Post 7408022)
I am now wondering what you would do in this situation. Would you look for work elsewhere or see if things improve here? I think I got myself here because I am not assertive at all and let Kevin do this to me. I'm worried that everyone thinks I am weak and a big baby for crying in front of them too. :( I feel like I am not valued at this job because Kevin seems to be better than me at designing and styling so that is why people have been preferring his work over mine.

I am not certain about your line or work, but contractor work is largely on an at-needed basis, correct? If they brought someone else on in a permanent role, it sounds like they no longer need the contractor.

If you are a contractor, I would think you should always be on the look out for other work that will keep you busy, and in all honesty is probably better and will make you more money. As a contractor I would think one advantage would be that future employers would not spend a lot of time asking why you left your former employer.

newlywedder 13th September 2017 11:40 AM

Update on this:

We have the website launch date coming up on Monday so I been trying to work with Kevin and Lance. They still won't include me so I been asking other team members how I can help with the site. I don't want to go to my boss again for help because I don't want to look whiny or needy. I think Kevin is a huge jerk and he talks down to me. I hate working with him anyways.

I feel horrible that my hands are tied here and I can't really contribute as much as I could. Kevin insists on doing everything himself and doesn't want me to have any part it seems. He over-writes my code that I have done on the site as well. I worry that my boss might think that I'm not a good team member after the website is finished with because of this.

I'm trying to see if things improve after this website is over with and all we have is the upkeep and maintenance. I worry what I will be doing each day because Kevin keeps taking all the work that I used to do here. There does not seem to be a light at the end of this tunnel.

Right now I am looking for other jobs but they are not paying as much as what I'm making here, located too far away or require skills I don't have. If only Kevin was not hired, my job would be going good right now. UGGHHH!! :mad:

coolheadal 13th September 2017 5:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newlywedder (Post 7408022)
Hi! I been a contractor a this job for more than nine months now and it has been going great, until a new co-worker was hired last month. He has the same job as me, which is a UI/UX designer but is working for another manager.

For whatever reason, they merged his manager's people and my manager's people together into one team. His manager doesn't have anything ready for him to do yet so he has been welcome to work on the website that my manager is responsible for.

Before this guy was hired, whom is named Kevin, I was the only designer on the team so was responsible for designing all the UI/UX for everyone. There wasn't many projects, so on the side, I would do styling in CSS on the website we are building for the company.

Now, everyone goes to Kevin for all the UI/UX design and all the styling so I have no work to do. I been doing training on my own because of this problem I am having. I am also the only female on the team as well, please note.

We are in an Agile/SCRUM environment so each week we are assigned projects. Kevin was assigned to design the website with me and this other guy who does Front End Development named Lance. He decided to team up with the guy only and left me out of the project.

After which seemed like begging, I was thrown a few "bones" of work like an icon set and writing copy for some parts of the site. I got done with those quickly but he ignored any other requests to help with anything else. Kevin and Lance decided they would design the whole website themselves.

On Thursday, I had an emotional outburst during a meeting when they were assigning tasks on the board. Only Kevin and Lance's name were up on the board under the project. I think they decided that they just wanted to work by themselves and not with me.

It made me so upset that I yelled out and alerted my boss that Kevin has been taking all my work. I said I had nothing to do anymore and that I was worried I was going to be fired. Then, I started sobbing in a heap of tears in front of everyone!

My boss told everyone to get out and talked with me about what has been going on. He said that I am not going to be fired but in the process of being hired on to the company. I am contractor right now. He said he would talk to Kevin and Lance about including me in the project.

I am now wondering what you would do in this situation. Would you look for work elsewhere or see if things improve here? I think I got myself here because I am not assertive at all and let Kevin do this to me. I'm worried that everyone thinks I am weak and a big baby for crying in front of them too. :( I feel like I am not valued at this job because Kevin seems to be better than me at designing and styling so that is why people have been preferring his work over mine.

Really pull yourself together man what the heck is your problem. Let them love Kevin over you so what the fudge! Now grow some and you can get a better job as User Interface and User Experience Expert. Why settle for this position they don't want you there so you just leave. Do not show him the ropes either. Your done get up and leave.

Your in hot demand right now you can get such a better position with higher paid and more. as UI/UX.. Android is hot you know today if you got those skills or even IOS too under your belt.

What's really troubling that your crying over a job no one really cares that your unhappy so you need to move on dude. Really are you so weak, come on now get some self-esteem and confidence your talents/skills set.

angel.eyes 14th September 2017 8:18 AM

It's incredibly frustrating to work with people like this! However, there will always be some version of Kevin in your work life. The key is to figure out how you are going to deal with him and them in general.

How is Kevin getting more work than you if you're in an Agile/Scrum environment?
  • Is he being proactive while you're waiting for others to give you an assignment?
  • Does he have better relationships with others than you do? Does he hang out with them outside the confines of your project. Is he attentive and responsive to their concerns and questions? Is he communicating more than you are? Being more visible than you are?
There are other potential reasons for the dynamic you're experiencing, but most often, it's one or both of these two that's at play.

I don't know your age, but that would be helpful to know in this particular situation.

stillafool 14th September 2017 8:38 AM

I hope you are still looking for another job. I have a feeling they aren't going to need you much longer.

UpwardForward 14th September 2017 8:53 AM

Yes, Possibly Kevin has been more aggressive in getting work, and so others have developed confidence in him. And his eagerness transmitting to others a possible outcome of quality and timeliness. Naturally it's hard know.

While you are submitting applications for other jobs, and taking interviews - and if you have no work: Are you able to observe Kevin's work?

If you are able to view Kevin's ongoing or finished projects to notice his style, or how you would do the same, differently. Use the time to learn from Kevin, or assurance in your own style and ideas.

newlywedder 19th September 2017 2:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by coolheadal (Post 7414879)
Really pull yourself together man what the heck is your problem. Let them love Kevin over you so what the fudge! Now grow some and you can get a better job as User Interface and User Experience Expert. Why settle for this position they don't want you there so you just leave. Do not show him the ropes either. Your done get up and leave.

Your in hot demand right now you can get such a better position with higher paid and more. as UI/UX.. Android is hot you know today if you got those skills or even IOS too under your belt.

What's really troubling that your crying over a job no one really cares that your unhappy so you need to move on dude. Really are you so weak, come on now get some self-esteem and confidence your talents/skills set.

I do web design and development so have been getting lots of calls for other jobs. I haven't seen anything that paid as much yet so am still looking. I might just settle for less here.

You are right that I haven't been feeling confident and am lacking self-esteem because of this awful co-worker. I'm just feeling stuck right now. :(

newlywedder 19th September 2017 2:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by angel.eyes (Post 7415282)
It's incredibly frustrating to work with people like this! However, there will always be some version of Kevin in your work life. The key is to figure out how you are going to deal with him and them in general.

How is Kevin getting more work than you if you're in an Agile/Scrum environment?
  • Is he being proactive while you're waiting for others to give you an assignment?
  • Does he have better relationships with others than you do? Does he hang out with them outside the confines of your project. Is he attentive and responsive to their concerns and questions? Is he communicating more than you are? Being more visible than you are?
There are other potential reasons for the dynamic you're experiencing, but most often, it's one or both of these two that's at play.

I don't know your age, but that would be helpful to know in this particular situation.

I'm 35 years old and yes, I am acting like a baby here. I just hate how this guy brings out the worst in me. I am all irritable and angry when I get to work. I hate working with him because he over steps boundaries by taking over work that was assigned to me. I'm just tired of it all.

It helps that he is a guy and everyone else is a guy too. I try to communicate the best I can but it doesn't help that I am penis-less. Everyone prefers his design for everything. I'm a lame duck with nothing to offer anyone here.

He is being proactive I have noticed by coming up with his own projects. That was how he got to design the whole site himself. Everyone chooses to work with him over me!

newlywedder 19th September 2017 2:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stillafool (Post 7415293)
I hope you are still looking for another job. I have a feeling they aren't going to need you much longer.

Yes I have been looking but was promised I would be hired here next month. Kevin can't be hired because he has no degree. After his contract is over with, he is gone. That is the only light at the end of this tunnel, that he is limited here.

I don't think I should leave just because of Kevin since he is a temporary worker. I am going to be a full time permanent employee soon.

I need some tactics on how to deal with Kevin and his rudeness. He has no social skills whatsoever and is so controlling.

He takes over work that was assigned to me and makes me feel badly for speaking up about it. I'm just so tired of him redesigning all the work that I have done since starting here. He thinks he is the world's best designer or something and has no respect for me.

newlywedder 19th September 2017 2:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UpwardForward (Post 7415306)
Yes, Possibly Kevin has been more aggressive in getting work, and so others have developed confidence in him. And his eagerness transmitting to others a possible outcome of quality and timeliness. Naturally it's hard know.

While you are submitting applications for other jobs, and taking interviews - and if you have no work: Are you able to observe Kevin's work?

If you are able to view Kevin's ongoing or finished projects to notice his style, or how you would do the same, differently. Use the time to learn from Kevin, or assurance in your own style and ideas.

His style is very corporate with no creativity at all. I guess that is what people here love. I have an art background so try to be more creative with my designs. Having to stick with his boring design choices on this website kills me.

He sits much further away from me which is the only saving grace here. I don't know what I would do if he were sitting by me. I would lose it for sure.

That's a good idea to learn his style too so it can help me in future endeavors. It just makes me want to tear out my hair that he keeps redesigning all my work and taking projects on that were assigned to me.


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 8:58 PM.

Copyright © 1997-2013 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.