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My Male Friend Co Worker Is Back


Business and Professional Relationships Networking and maintaining a positive environment in the work place is important! Surviving the 9-to-5 within.

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Old 7th April 2017, 9:18 AM   #46
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Women prefer guys who are already in relationships because they are tested and have more value. This behavior is far more prevalent than women will admit. Two women wanting one guy leaves some lonely guy in the cold. But said lonely guy is probably socially awkward.

Yes, someone once said. A woman won't date a man that lives with his Mom, but she will sleep with a man that lives with his wife.
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Old 7th April 2017, 9:28 AM   #47
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How do you think this will end up?

Sleeping with someone who is already involved with his gf. He's unhappily involved, but is very much attracted to me as I with him. He cares about me. He's not planning on leaving his gf and I don't want them to separate. I'm unattached and living the good life. My heart has been broken and I'm not trying to get into a relationship.

We work together, but in different departments. I don't care about the ramifications of anything at this point in life. I'm tired of playing the good guy in every situation. I just want to play. I know he's clean, discreet, careful and willing to please me.

Did I strike gold?
~Let go of people who dull your shine, poison your spirit, and bring you drama. Cancel your subscription to their issues.

You need to cancel your subscription to your OWN issues as well. You are setting yourself up for a world of drama and hurt . . .

I know he's clean, discreet, careful -- Is He???? How can this be true if he's cheating on his wife . . . ? Furthermore, in a cheating situation, it also means he's manipulative and sneaky. Great qualities in a guy. If he can/is putting one over on his wife, he'll put one over on you.
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Old 7th April 2017, 9:46 AM   #48
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I woke up to a gang of messages!

Yes it's the co worker who wouldn't spend any time with me after work, but now he's making time... somehow he says things are different.

I've read and posted replies on OW/OM forum. I understand the consequences. My rationality in his situation is that it's not a marriage. I may even think it's an open relationship. If that's the case no harm, no foul.

I'm still holding out for hope that I'll find someone soon, but I'm not going to hold my breath either.

This isn't about sex, but a connection on all levels which is difficult to find.

I'm not out to hurt anyone or be hurt in the process. I'll proceed with caution.

I just needed to get your constructive feedback, which I really do appreciate, to consider my decision on which way to go.
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Last edited by Tressugar; 7th April 2017 at 9:52 AM..
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Old 7th April 2017, 11:08 AM   #49
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My rationality in his situation is that it's not a marriage.
It may not be a marriage but it's a committed relationship. Same rules apply.


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I may even think it's an open relationship. If that's the case no harm, no foul.
Contact the girlfriend and ask her. Or better yet, ask the guy for his girlfriend's number so that you can ask her about their 'open relationship'.

Then watch him squirm and try to wriggle out of it....


You really are fooling yourself if you think you can avoid causing hurt in this situation.
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Old 7th April 2017, 11:17 AM   #50
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I would never be someone's side chick or anyone's seconds.

I respect my friend's relationship and actually side with his girlfriend on their issue.

I've been cheated on and it doesn't feel good.
Try to get to get back to this level of consciousness.
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Old 7th April 2017, 11:24 AM   #51
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Try to get to get back to this level of consciousness.

Reposted for emphasis . . . !!!!!! Empathy and insight are the needles of our moral, emotional and mental compasses.
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Old 7th April 2017, 3:17 PM   #52
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Thanks you guys! 🙂
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Old 7th April 2017, 3:25 PM   #53
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Come on.

Set the bar a little higher for yourself huh?

Struck gold?! Gees, if this is a wish come true..... I simply astonished by how little you strive for. Some scraps? Being a secret? That's all you want in life?

Make some better choices for yourself, and there are much easier better ways to get some NSA. Really, guys love free sex, it's easy to procure.
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Old 7th April 2017, 3:31 PM   #54
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What was his reply?
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Old 7th April 2017, 3:31 PM   #55
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I'll go out to dinner with you.

Yeah, I went there.

In all seriousness though:

I think you should do what you want and don't look back!
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Old 7th April 2017, 3:36 PM   #56
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Tres, I have a lot of respect for you but now...I have to say I'm really disappointed

As a woman thats been cheated on countless times, your point of view on this almost makes me angry

But it mostly makes me sad for you

E.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g you said is so a$$ backwards I dont even know where to start

Are you ok?

This is not something a healthy, happy, morally driven, respectable person would do or think

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Old 7th April 2017, 3:39 PM   #57
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Tres, I have a lot of respect for you but now...I have to say I'm really disappointed

As a woman thats been cheated on countless times, your point of view on this almost makes me angry

But it mostly makes me sad for you

E.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g you said is so a$$ backwards I dont even know where to start

Are you ok?

This is not something a healthy, happy, morally driven, respectable person would do or think

Unless of course we just got dumped by someone we totally are into and really just want to make a series of bad decisions because, let's face it, the one person we wanted to care: doesn't.
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Old 7th April 2017, 4:28 PM   #58
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Unless of course we just got dumped by someone we totally are into and really just want to make a series of bad decisions because, let's face it, the one person we wanted to care: doesn't.
Being hurt doesnt make hurting someone else ok
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Old 7th April 2017, 4:37 PM   #59
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Being hurt doesnt make hurting someone else ok
I don't think she's asking about the morality, or repercussions, of her choices, just stating that she struck gold with this guy. I totally understand why she wants to make these bad decisions, I feel the same after my last rejection from a woman I really wanted to see this weekend. It really just makes me want to go do a bunch of stupid **** just to feel alive because I feel pretty ****ty.
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Old 7th April 2017, 4:56 PM   #60
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I don't think she's asking about the morality, or repercussions, of her choices, just stating that she struck gold with this guy. I totally understand why she wants to make these bad decisions, I feel the same after my last rejection from a woman I really wanted to see this weekend. It really just makes me want to go do a bunch of stupid **** just to feel alive because I feel pretty ****ty.
Pls dont contribute to this dysfunctional thinking. Tres needs to be lifted up right now...not raised any lower

How on earth did she strike gold with this guy??? OMG!

When I read the title of this thread....then read OP....I was more confused than I was when my dementia patient told me he wanted to use the phone to talk to the, "action figures at the Outback Steakhouse"

And again, just because she's hurt doesnt mean hurting another woman is ok
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