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JUST Found out she's had a bf the whole time


Business and Professional Relationships Networking and maintaining a positive environment in the work place is important! Surviving the 9-to-5 within.

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Old 17th February 2017, 12:44 AM   #1
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JUST Found out she's had a bf the whole time

So there's this girl at work. Super cute, and from what I could tell *single at the time* A friend of mine liked her also, so I said **** it bro go for it. He tried, made up excuses and failed. Then he said I should go for it. I was like w/e I didn't really put much though or effort into her. Usually during work hours she would come by my area and just stare at me, or look at me then look away. This has been going on for about two weeks. I would talk to her for a little bit, not much. She doesn't even know my name but she's been asking my name for a while now. Giving off hints like, how come I don't wear a name tag and what not. Anyhow, one time we both closed and I was sitting down. She then decides to go to the fridge, bend right over in front of me and just *pretend* to look for **** there for a good 2-3 min. I just looked at her like, is she srs right now? and I kinda laughed in my head a bit. I whipped out my phone, and as soon as I did someone else came in the room. Then after my friend came and we were leaving, so I got up and she just STARED at me. I waved at her and said bye, she said nothing and just kept looking at me while I walked down the stairs. Fast forward 2 days I see her again and it feels like she's not as interested. She followed me downstairs and I decided to call her out on what she did the other day as a joke, she laughed and said she had no idea what I was talking about. Then I said sure, and we walked off, later that same day. I go to take a piss, she's upstairs, I go downstairs, she follows me and asks what I was talking about earlier. I explained what I meant and she said oh no it wasn't intentional *I swear to god if it's not intentional I'm confused* anyhow I see her after work but she doesn't say anything, sits there and txts, and leaves with her brother. Didn't even look at me or anything. Did she completely lose interest? Should I keep flirting? Keep in mind she never told me she has a bf, and I've only been able to talk to her for like 2 min tops in an interaction. Don't wanna get her # with all the staff looking so I haven't gotten it yet. *Now that I'm actually slightly interested* seems like she's lost interest already. What do I do now, ask for her # after I flirt with her again? do nothing?

Last edited by wardzor; 17th February 2017 at 12:54 AM..
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Old 17th February 2017, 12:55 AM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wardzor View Post
So there's this girl at work. Super cute, and from what I could tell *single at the time* A friend of mine liked her also, so I said **** it bro go for it. He tried , made up excuses and failed. Then he said I should go for it. I was like w/e I didn't really put much though or effort into her. Usually during work hours she would come by my area and just stare at me, or look at me then look away. This has been going on for about two weeks. I would talk to her for a little bit, not much. She doesn't even know my name but she's been asking my name for a while now. Giving off hints like, how come I don't wear a name tag and what not. Anyhow, one time we both closed and I was sitting down. She then decides to go to the fridge, bend right over in front of me and just *pretend* to look for **** there for a good 2-3 min. I just looked at her like, is she srs right now? and I kinda laughed in my head a bit. I whipped out my phone, and as soon as I did someone else came in the room. Then after my friend came and we were leaving, so I got up and she just STARED at me. I waved at her and said bye, she said nothing and just kept looking at me while I walked down the stairs. Fast forward 2 days I see her again and it feels like she's not as interested. She followed me downstairs and I decided to call her out on what she did the other day as a joke, she laughed and said she had no idea what I was talking about. Then I said sure, and we walked off, later that same day. I go to take a piss, she's upstairs, I go downstairs, she follows me and asks what I was talking about earlier. I explained what I meant and she said oh no it wasn't intentional *I swear to god if it's not intentional I'm confused* anyhow I see her after work but she doesn't say anything, sits there and txts, and leaves with her brother. Didn't even look at me or anything. Did she completely lose interest? Should I keep flirting? Keep in mind she never told me she has a bf, and I've only been able to talk to her for like 2 min tops in an interaction. Don't wanna get her # with all the staff looking so I haven't gotten it yet. *Now that I'm actually slightly interested* seems like she's lost interest already. What do?
I'm confused. Where exactly in this narrative is there anything that could be described as flirting?

Please tell me staring at someone when they're bent over in front of you doesn't qualify as flirting?
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Old 17th February 2017, 1:41 AM   #3
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Don't really get the 2nd part of what you said but to answer the first part. When I talk to her for however short it is, she's flirting with me. Made a really stupid joke, she died of laughter, eye contact, hair tossing etc. I just didn't add that in, and the part you added in bold. Well, I guess it must have appeared I'm flirting with her also. At first I wasn't but now yea I kinda am
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Old 17th February 2017, 1:50 AM   #4
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she has a bf. move on.
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Old 17th February 2017, 6:32 AM   #5
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You need to understand that staring at her and especially taking a picture of her butt while she is bent over is not flirting; it's sexual harassment. Keep your phone in your pocket & the camera off at work.


Does this girl know your name yet? Try talking to her like a person not an object. She's acting uninterested because you embarrassed her. If she has a BF she is now trying to put some distance into your work relationship.

Last edited by d0nnivain; 17th February 2017 at 6:36 AM..
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Old 17th February 2017, 8:13 AM   #6
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taking a picture of her butt while she is bent over is not flirting;
Really!? Seriously!? another prank thread right
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Old 17th February 2017, 8:26 AM   #7
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Taking a picture of her bum is incredibly distasteful and equal to sexual harassment! In future, if a girl is flirting with you, then act like a gentleman and don't go round acting vulgar like that as you could wind up getting yourself in trouble.

Last edited by GoldSparkz; 17th February 2017 at 8:28 AM.. Reason: Grammar
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Old 17th February 2017, 9:01 AM   #8
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Sounds like any interest she had in you was mostly in your head. I don't think she did anything wrong. Looking at someone in itself means nothing. She could have STARED at you for variety of reasons - maybe she thought you were weird staring at her. She'd be right because it's not cool to make it up in your head someone bending over to get something is only pretending to for your viewing pleasureand proceed to try take a picture (wtf, that's creepy) Regardless, she has a bf. Move on.
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Old 17th February 2017, 9:05 AM   #9
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She wasn't interested in you to begin with! Plus who the hell takes pictures of girl's butt? WTF
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Old 17th February 2017, 10:17 AM   #10
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If you see a girl you like, just go right up to her and introduce yourself like a gentleman. Girls like a guy that have confidence, and are willing to make a bold statement showing their interest. It flatters them. If she has a BF she will tell you then you graciously pay her a compliment like "he's a lucky guy", then walk away.
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Old 17th February 2017, 10:20 AM   #11
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Be prepared my friend, you could be looking at a harassment complaint in a hurry.
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Old 17th February 2017, 11:50 AM   #12
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I hate to be the one who gives you this information, but I feel I must: A nice butt or boobs on a woman is not an invitation for you to have sex with her.

Just because you're aroused does not mean she is inviting you.

She is clearly otherwise occupied and you and your little friend got all frothing at the mouth and carried away.
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Old 17th February 2017, 1:57 PM   #13
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This is all in your head.

You're over thinking all of it.

Just leave her alone - over thinking anything to do with relationships does not bode well at all for any work based relationship.
Work based relationships only work for those who do not over think or over analyse.
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Old 17th February 2017, 2:22 PM   #14
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I tend to avoid work relationships anyway. There's too much drama that can go on and it gets old. Example:

-Co-worker comes into my room daily and chats. Talks about hanging out on weekends but isn't tossing out any concrete plans.
-I ask her out, she says she'll text but I don't hear from her.
-Things become weird at work from her end. She avoids me at all costs. People start talking about it.
-I make an effort to be as pleasant as possible with her and things gradually get back to normal.
-Things get weird at the staff Christmas party as she was hammered drunk. Nothing happens between the two of us but I get out of there when she gets handsy.
-Work becomes weird again. I stay pleasant, things go back to normal.
-She comes into my room, we chat and she tells me she has been in a LDR off and on the whole time. I don't think anything of it but don't plan on asking her out again.
-She pops into my room, I ask her what she's up to that weekend, just making conversation. She says she's "cleaning her house and her car" and beats feet out the door.
-Another gossipy co-worker informs me that this woman is now single and has stated that her "biological is ticking".

I am now avoiding the co-worker.
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Old 17th February 2017, 3:15 PM   #15
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When you told her that you thought that she was intentionally bending over by the refrigerator in order to get your attention, you made her uncomfortable. Imagine one of your male coworkers telling you that he thinks you had bent over deliberately, or if you discovered that he tried to take a photo of you. It's the kind of banter that you might get away with if the woman is someone you're dating or have been friends with for a long time, but not with someone that you barely know.

If you want to avoid being known as the "creepy guy" or coming to the attention of management, I'd also advise you to not take photos of your coworkers - or anyone else - without their permission.

Last edited by O'Malley; 17th February 2017 at 3:29 PM..
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