LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Platonic > Business and Professional Relationships

They won't accept my wish to resign.


Business and Professional Relationships Networking and maintaining a positive environment in the work place is important! Surviving the 9-to-5 within.

Like Tree24Likes
 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 20th September 2016, 3:43 PM   #1
Established Member
 
Madame_Noire's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 276
They won't accept my wish to resign.

Hi guys

I have been in my current role for two years. I have tried countless times to hand in my letter of resignation but the one person in the HR/Personnel department will not accept it, beg me to stay and ask what they can do to change my mind.

I am happy to work my notice period and train whomever will be replacing me but they always try and talk me out of it. It seems they cannot take no for an answer and it affects my morale at work because I really do not want to be there anymore.

The reason I wish to leave is because I have to rely on others to raise and complete the apporiate paperwork to fulfil what is asked of me on it and get it delivered to the customer. I tried to resign 18 months ago and they called a meeting saying what they would do to change. Suprise suprise, nothing changed. So I am back to square one. There are people there that purposely slack and do not pull their weight, the owners of the company is aware of this but chooses to turn a blind eye because they do not like confrontation.

It is so frustrating working with people who seem incompetant with a poor work ethic and it hinders me being able to carry out my role.

Today I tried to resign and they said they don't want me to leave, they will do whatever they can. I told them that was all said before.

Why won't they accept my notice?? It is now affecting my mood and homelife now.
Madame_Noire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th September 2016, 3:46 PM   #2
Established Member
 
GorillaTheater's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 9,433
Well, you're not a slave. Either submit a letter of resignation effective on a date certain and stick to it, or demand a huge raise to make this BS somewhat worth your while.
GorillaTheater is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th September 2016, 3:57 PM   #3
S2B
Established Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 3,195
Find another job. Start the new job.

Don't show up at the current job...


They don't have that kind of power over you! You want to quit = then quit! After the allotted time goes by (2 weeks is gracious) don't show up at the current work place.
S2B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 20th September 2016, 4:09 PM   #4
Established Member
 
Madame_Noire's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 276
Thank you for the responses so far. I am already in the process of applying for new jobs. As soon as a suitable one arises that fits my skill set, I will be off and I will advise the new employer of the issues if there is an unsatisfactory reference.

Thanks again.
Madame_Noire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21st September 2016, 8:31 AM   #5
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 964
Did you have other jobs lined up the "countless times" you have tried to resign?
Survivor12 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21st September 2016, 10:00 AM   #6
Established Member
 
Miss Peach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: With Professor Plum in the Library with the Candlestick
Posts: 2,678
I had the same thing happen when I quit my last job. You just tell them you really appreciate the offer but you feel it's in your best interest to move on.
Miss Peach is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21st September 2016, 2:19 PM   #7
Established Member
 
Madame_Noire's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 276
I have two jobs. I wanted to drop this job and remain in my primary job, just having one employer. Don't worry, I do not plan on being a burden to the public purse and claiming benefits.

Now the managers, PA and directors kept asking if I am okay. Really creeping around me.
Madame_Noire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21st September 2016, 3:06 PM   #8
Established Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 2,609
It sounds like the bigger issue is that you can't say no to people. It's affected you in the job, and you can't even say no when they ask you not to leave. You should really work on your assertiveness as this isn't going to magically stop when you leave this job. People will continue to use you in whatever way they see fit if you let them.

But this is a pretty simple problem. You hand in your resignation and you stop going to work in 2 weeks. They can't refuse to accept it.
GunslingerRoland is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 21st September 2016, 3:57 PM   #9
Established Member
 
MidKnightDreams's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Big D
Posts: 3,401
Quote:
Originally Posted by GunslingerRoland View Post
It sounds like the bigger issue is that you can't say no to people. It's affected you in the job, and you can't even say no when they ask you not to leave. You should really work on your assertiveness as this isn't going to magically stop when you leave this job. People will continue to use you in whatever way they see fit if you let them.

But this is a pretty simple problem. You hand in your resignation and you stop going to work in 2 weeks. They can't refuse to accept it.
Assertiveness would probably fix the problem at this job.

There's not a whole lot of difference between asking people to provide you what you need to do your job (and not getting it) and asking somebody to resign (and not getting it). Wondering what to do when they turn down the resignation.

How would things be different or better at another job if it's apparent what you say or ask for can be overlooked or ignored?

Learning to be more assertive would beneficial to her career and possibly other areas of her life. How to make what you say impactful and effective. That could be the deeper issue here.
MidKnightDreams is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 23rd September 2016, 12:51 PM   #10
S2B
Established Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 3,195
Resigning isn't a request - it's a statement or a command.

I think your delivery isn't clear and concise. Be direct - as in, my last day is ____.

You. We'd to work on your delivery of what message you send...
S2B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 23rd September 2016, 3:38 PM   #11
Established Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 5,188
In many of my past roles they have said no to my resignation but I got out whenever I wanted to.

I don't buy a salary increase or a promise of things changing to make me stay.

I recall one time when I had a Director haul me in from the French office (whom we reported to) she literally screamed her head off at me - massively unprofessional and the fact I was very soon due to report direct to her made my mind up even more!!

In work you choose your own path - you don't just choose to do whatever people want.
GemmaUK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 23rd September 2016, 5:58 PM   #12
Established Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 964
Quote:
Originally Posted by Madame_Noire View Post
I have two jobs. I wanted to drop this job and remain in my primary job, just having one employer. Don't worry, I do not plan on being a burden to the public purse and claiming benefits.

Now the managers, PA and directors kept asking if I am okay. Really creeping around me.
Now I'm even more confused. First you said that you were looking for another job & commented about an "unsatisfactory reference" & now you're saying that you have another primary job & wanted to drop this one.

It seems that there is more to the story than lack of assertiveness, but without clarification, offering helpful advice is impossible.

Whatever the case, I hope things work out for you.
Survivor12 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 15th May 2017, 3:04 PM   #13
Established Member
 
Madame_Noire's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 276
This is a bit of a long vent. Please bear with me as I have to provide clarification...

I worked two jobs for the past 4 years. One where I was outsourced to a company for the past 4 years as a cleaner or janitor as you call it in the U.S. Then, as soon as the first shift/job ended, I commenced a role for the place I was outsourced to directly for the last 3 years whereby I put company logos on garments for various businesses, this could be hundreds of garments a day.

In March, I resigned from the clothing job because I felt I didn't get recognition and acknowledgment for all the work I did. Also, I think every company has a diagram showing the hierarchy and who is who. I was not even on there, I only recently stumbled across it. That was like a kick in the teeth. When I wrote my letter of resignation, I stated, that if it was not for the role I did, the customers would not get their orders. My predecessor walked out of the job without giving notice and the company begged me to take the role while I was doing the cleaning role because they had a backlog of orders. I would have thought they would have worshiped the ground I walked on seen as I said yes to help them out.

The final straw was when my grandmother died and colleagues were moaning about the time I took off for bereavement because I was the only one that did the job and my manager would frequently complain about not having the time to cover my work. I never had a sick day, was never late and got on with my work. The day my gran died, I stayed at work because I didn't want to leave my employer in the lurch because there was alot of work on and saved the time off for the funeral and the day off, so they had two weeks notice at least. Coincidentally, the day of the funeral was time I had already booked off a month before, well in advance.

I continued doing the first job for the company. There was no animosity, I remained professional and continued my role.....I have now been offered a new role elsewhere, completely different career, closer to home and the clothing job employers, who I left in March are upset I didn't tell them and had to hear it from the outsourcing/ cleaning company - my current employer. The clothing company I have had issues with and I have tried many times to hand in my notice but they would not accept it, they said they didn't want me to leave and they say I do a good job. I wanted them to put their money where their mouth is and asked for more money. They said they could not do that. I then asked them to allow me to work my notice period. I asked for more money because other colleagues have openly discussed what their income is and I was on minimum wage.

Why are they being like this? I didn't have to tell them, they are not my employer any more.


Hope this is clearer, sorry for any previous confusion.
Madame_Noire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 15th May 2017, 3:44 PM   #14
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 17,447
Tell HR nothing had changed from the last time you agreed to stay if things changed. It might not even be the same HR person and maybe she doesn't even know or whatever. But they can't stop you from just walking out.
__________________
"I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not better for it." -- Abraham Lincoln
preraph is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 16th May 2017, 9:57 AM   #15
Established Member
 
thefooloftheyear's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 9,485
I don't understand how that company operates....

Ive been a business owner for almost 30 years...Its even rare that I allow someone to stay that gives notice...I normally just pay them to that point and show them the door...Like you accurately stated...Once someone doesn't want to be there, then you have to get them out of there, so they don't disrupt morale and/or start to become the workplace lawyer..

No disrespect, but no one is irreplaceable...I just don't understand their attitude..

My advice is just dont come in and forget about giving notice...I never judged a new hire on whether or not they gave notice...Its not as important as people make it out to be..

Good Luck..
\
TFY
__________________
"don't fear the baddest or strongest.....fear the one that never gives up"
thefooloftheyear is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
When should you resign/not care about improving social skills? NGC1300 Self-Improvement and Personal Well-Being 6 22nd March 2015 9:27 AM
Ask to resign??? beautiful_stranger Business and Professional Relationships 7 15th July 2009 11:34 AM
Should I just resign myself to the fact that whatever it was is over? dsbs39 Dating 5 20th February 2004 5:06 AM

 

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 9:12 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2013 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.