Hersheys Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 Hi! I'd like to know how do you deal with a rude/obnoxious co-worker? They say to be extra kind to this co-worker but I don't want to. I don't want to reward bad behavior. Help please and thanks in advance! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 You are not rewarding bad behavior. You are re-training the person to be nicer. When you say good morning & they respond F- you, you reply, well I hope your day gets better. It's more about not sinking to the other person's level. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 I find laughter and derision works best with those types. Next time they say something utterly obnoxious, jolly laughter. And yes, you are laughing at them, not with them, but at least you are not being crabby like they are at work. Link to post Share on other sites
CC12 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 They say to be extra kind to this co-worker but I don't want to. Who said to be extra kind to this coworker? If your boss said to do this, then you better follow directions. Don't even worry about rewarding bad behavior. This isn't your personal life, this is your job. Your job likely has nothing to do with regulating the behavior of your coworkers, so don't make it your problem. Being nice to them is probably the best way to go. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 There's been a few times in my work life where I was 'warned' to treat a colleague differently due to their temper/rudeness. Never once did I change my behaviour. I treated each of them just as I would anyone else. The result was they gained respect for me and it happened pretty quickly too - just within weeks or a few months. All of those that I was warned about became good friends of mine, some still are to this day. I would advise treating them just like you would anyone else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted January 9, 2016 Share Posted January 9, 2016 Depends. Do you have to work with that person? If not, just ignore them. I find it much easier if those with unable to control themselves go and bother someone else. Cuts down on the confrontation as sure as hell I won't tolerate disrespect. In my opinion those that do, make it harder for everyone else. The saying 'teach others how to treat you' doesn't just apply to romantic relationships. If you have to work with them, are they rude about your work or just in general? If it's about your work, it's bullying and it should go through to HR. No-one should feel under valued and at risk. If it's general rudeness, speak to your line manager and ask for another person to work with on this project if necessary. Don't subject yourself to stress if you are forced to have contact with this person. Those that say just accept it are wrong and are enablers. Link to post Share on other sites
Akashsingh Posted January 11, 2016 Share Posted January 11, 2016 Do not contact HR. They are there to protect the company from lawsuits and nothing else. One of the two will have to go and others will remember what you did to this person. Go to your boss and say explicitly what behaviors of this another co worker provoke you.. Your boss will send out an emissary to help patch the conflict. It will take a few weeks to months but things will be fine. Link to post Share on other sites
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