d0nnivain Posted December 5, 2015 Share Posted December 5, 2015 I have my own business but sometimes I take on contract work from others when things are slow. About 5 years ago I started doing contract work for a great guy. I like him & the work but it was about 2-4 hours per week if that. He's currently in a bind so I agreed to work part time 20 hours per week for him during December at a rate way below my market value. He's pressuring me to close my business & come be his full time employee. I have no interest in doing this. First he has ADD/ADHD & he's too frenetic for me. It's hard to concentrate around him. Second, his office is chaos. Third, I'd make about 1/4 of what I earn now but have to work 3x as hard. No thanks. Fourth I feel that being an employee again after being an owner is a step back in life. Fifth working for him doubles my commute without traffic & triples it with traffic. Plus where I currently am parking is free & a short walk; by him I pay $10+ per day & have to walk several blocks. I have said no several times. I keep reminding him that I agreed to 1 month. He doesn't seem to be hearing me. Can anybody suggest some strong but polite words to get through to him? I don't want to ruin the friendship / professional relationship we have but by the time December is over I'm going to need a month away from him. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted December 5, 2015 Share Posted December 5, 2015 (edited) "I'm already under contract for Jan-March elsewhere." If you did want to rethink the idea, ask for something absolutely outrageous like partial ownership or stock options, 3 weeks off a year and 6x the salary. If he doesn't take it, then you can still consult part time. If he does take it, it could be worth it to come on as a partner/owner. Edited December 5, 2015 by loveweary11 Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted December 5, 2015 Author Share Posted December 5, 2015 He'd give me all the time off I wanted. It's not a job I have to be there to do all the time. As for the money, it's a good idea but I'm half afraid he'd pay me that. At any price, I don't know if I could work for him. There are upsides to the idea, which is why I agreed to December because all of the people I confided in before taking the gig told me it would be good for me. After only 3 days I can see that it is helping me in the senses they told me it would but I am more convinced that I couldn't do it long term. I know I will find a way through this. It's just weighing on my mind right now. Link to post Share on other sites
loveweary11 Posted December 5, 2015 Share Posted December 5, 2015 Lol.. sounds like a terrible work environment. I'll stick with the first sentence in my earlier post as the best response then. You are already under contract Jan-March. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted December 5, 2015 Share Posted December 5, 2015 Maybe you could offer to help him find someone permanent? Write up a job description for the role and you could offer to help get the advert out there and help with CV's and interviews. You need to stick to your guns that you can't and wouldn't be willing at all to give up your own business. Make sure he is always clear on the end date for this temporary help you are giving him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NewLeaf512 Posted December 6, 2015 Share Posted December 6, 2015 Perhaps a hybrid solution could be an option. If you are reaping some benefits from the mechanics of the set up but he and his environment are the issue. Agree to work for him 2 days a week (your choice) and work on your business, contract for another company or just hang out the other 3 days. You don't have to give a reason except that "I have an important piece of business come in that I'm not at liberty to discuss, and it would be a life long regret if I missed out on this project. I know you can understand this." That is what I suggested to a friend to use in a similar situation. (Her 3 days were used for therapy and NLP because she was dealing with depression. Working on yourself IS the most important business anyone needs to take care of and she would have regretted not getting treatment and taking all kinds of drugs for the rest of her life!) NL Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted December 6, 2015 Share Posted December 6, 2015 Oh goodness.... Come Christmas, leave, and don't go back in january! It's that simple, isn't it? You've told him several times, and he doesn't get it. Your actions will speak for you. It's not rocket science! Link to post Share on other sites
Author d0nnivain Posted December 6, 2015 Author Share Posted December 6, 2015 It's a tad more delicate then that. I genuinely respect the guy. He fed me work when I was starving. He's been a good friend when I was an emotional train wreck. I need to extricate myself from working for him FT but not do too much damage to the overall relationship. I think helping him find & train a FT employee would be the best bet . . . now how to suggest that to him in a way that he thinks it was his idea. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted December 6, 2015 Share Posted December 6, 2015 You just have to be firm and tell him, "I can't do it. My own business has picked up and I admit I kind of like being my own boss." You have to just keep saying no. And I think you should stop "helping him out" so this doesn't continue. Just say you're too busy. Over and over again if necessary. He may be ADD but if you just stop returning his calls if he doesn't respect your decision, he will get the message. "I don't know what else to tell you. The answer is no, but thanks." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mrldii Posted December 6, 2015 Share Posted December 6, 2015 Regardless of all your legitimate reasons for NOT wanting to be an employee of THIS person's company, the fact remains, years ago you started your own company TO be your own boss, invested time, money, and energy TO establish it (including those 'lean times'), and you enjoy the variety that working on several different projects, by several different personalities, who bring several different expectations and flavors to the mix that YOU call "earning a living". Personally, I think it's extremely presumptuous of this "friend" to expect you to change your life's direction and life's work to best suit his needs. He reads like a potential beau who won't take a "Sorry, I'm not interested" and instead insists you MUST give him a shot, because - after all - he's interested in you and therefore you have to give him the chance to prove he really IS the man for you. ~pfffftttt~ Why worry losing him as a friend OR client...demanding you close your business to just focus on him...at less pay AND with less interest? Would you settle-for-less in the dating world just to not hurt someone's feelings? Why - in the hell - would you even consider or worry about doing the same with your livelihood?!? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted December 6, 2015 Share Posted December 6, 2015 Maybe something like this? “I love our work arrangement right now. I don’t want to be your employee, or anyone’s employee for that matter. But I hope this continues.” BTW, I like not being an employee too… and… he’s being kinda bossy considering he’s not your boss! Kind of shooting himself in the foot, isn’t he? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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